


Lovable Obligation

by dazzledbyrobward88



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: All Human. Set in 19th century, Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-08-18
Updated: 2012-09-11
Packaged: 2017-11-12 09:13:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 54,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/489218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dazzledbyrobward88/pseuds/dazzledbyrobward88
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bella is forced to marry the most eligible bachelor in hopes of saving her family from bankruptcy. Will their days together make them get closer and fall in love or will it destroy any hopes of them being together? Set in 19th century.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 01. Prologue: Desperation

**Bella**

 

 

My name is Isabella (Bella) Marie Swan and this is the story of my life.

 

I was born in Chicago, Illinois to Charles Swan and Renee Swan. I am currently 17 years old and the fate of my family lies in my hands. My father was tumbled in the enmesh of debt, losing most of the family money to usurious in order to provide the life of welfare for my selfish money hungry mother, but the more he took loans, the more the interests became more sublimate till he was leaning on what little money we have left and it was the money coming from leasing our horse ranch. All of this because of my mother, and because my father loved her too much to refuse any of her demands. Thus, I was to be the bride in procession into the hands of the wealthiest bachelor.

 

The son of the towns' famous doctor. Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. I was to be taken as the bride of a man I hardly knew, to a man I have never seen before, and to a man known with his crudeness and isolated nature.

 

My life was taking the turn for the worst.


	2. 01. Arrangement

**Bella**

 

I was running and playing with my big brother and best friend in the snow. That was one of the most things I loved about Chicago, was the snow. I would run in it for hours, feeling the cold fluffy white underneath my feet. My big brother, Emmett would take pleasure in throwing snowballs at me. I would giggle every time he did it and he would holler with laughter.

"Bells, are you prepared for another ball?" Emmett said with a devilish gleam in his eyes. I didn't have the opportunity to answer as I was suddenly hit with yet another snowball, hitting me square in my face. I spluttered the snow that filled my mouth and I glared at him in mock.

"You are going to pay for this one, brother." I screamed as I made a big snowball and threw it at him. Of course, because I was a terrible aimer, that and the fact that I was the clumsiest person on the planet, it hit him in his leg, his black trouser's leg was smudged with a handful of white powder. He howled with laughter as he shook his head at me.

"You were never a good aimer Bells, Surrender!" He grinned and Rosalie, my best friend and Emmett's fiancé laughed with him.

"You traitor, you should be by my side, not his." I pouted and she laughed.

"He is my fiancé, Bella." She reminded me.

"Well, I am your best friend and you are supposed to take my side." I scowled at her.

"You will always have me by your side Bella; just not this time." She smiled hugging me. I smiled back and hugged her.

"I know, I was only teasing you." I said.

"Well, let's return to the house. It's starting to freeze out here and I'm starved." Emmett boomed making Rose and I laugh.

"God help you when you marry him. You will be in good need of feeding him, possibly every hour." I mocked and he scowled at me.

"It isn't my fault that I'm a fully grown man with perfectly muscled shape." He pressed.

"Alright, let us go inside, my monkey man." Rose smiled and he grinned at her wrapping his arm around her waist. I looked away when he leaned down to kiss her. I was never one to be jealous, but seeing Emmett and Rosalie this way always made me feel jealous. I have always wanted what they have, someone to love me to no end, care for me and put me at the forefront of his mind. I was a hopeless romantic as Emmett always called me and I have always yearned for my happily ever after. I always wanted to fall in love with a kind gentle handsome man whom I would spend the rest of my life with. I was always dreaming about him, and I'm still waiting for him to come to me.

We went inside and walked into the living room. As we entered, we saw mother sitting on the sofa with a very beautiful woman. She had caramel shoulder length wavy hair, a beautiful pale skin tinged with pink cheeks; her beautiful emerald green eyes were adorning her heart-shaped face. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, more so than my own mother if I dare to say. While my mother was beautiful in her own way, her character tainted that beauty. I know I was not supposed to speak of my mother in such way, but she was not the kindest person you could find.

"Hello Isabella. Come greet Mrs. Cullen." Mother said and I did my best to hide my grimace. She knew how much I disliked her calling me Isabella.

"Hello dear, It is a pleasure to finally meet you." Mrs. Cullen said with a bright smile. I found myself smiling back and quickly loving the kind gently woman whom I have never seen before.

"Hello Mrs. Cullen, the pleasure is all mine." I said politely. She smiled wider and took my hand in hers. Suddenly, her tenderness and loving demeanor made me wish she were my mother instead of Renee.

She might be my mother, but she hardly possessed any maternal feelings toward me, or even Emmett for that matter.

"Emmett, take Rosalie and leave." Mother said rudely and involuntarily I found myself scowling at her. She could not even have courtesy in front of guests.

Emmett sighed and came over to me, kissed my cheek and nodded to Mrs. Cullen.

"Mrs. Cullen." He smiled, she smiled back.

"Nice meeting you Emmett, and you too, Rosalie." She responded in kind. Emmett and Rose smiled at her before retreating to the kitchen. I saw seated beside Mrs. Cullen when mother spoke, rather roughly at me.

"Isabella, Mrs. Cullen has honored us with her visit today to discuss an arrangement between us." She said and I nodded, smiling still at the kind woman holding my hand.

"Dear, I know that you might think it is not fair, and it might be frightening for you, but I assure you that you will not regret it." Mrs. Cullen said vaguely and I looked at her with a little confusion, still unable to stop smiling at her.

Mother cut in with her next words.

"The arrangement is for you to marry her eldest son, Edward." Her words were harsh and rough, her icy blue eyes staring at me, daring me to speak.

My smile fell after hearing her words.

"W- what? What do you mean?" I asked dumbly. Mother sighed irritably.

"I mean what I have said. You are going to marry Edward Cullen, Mr. and Mrs. Cullen's son. What more is there to understand?" she hissed and I saw anger flash in Mrs. Cullen's eyes as she stared at mother.

"Be gentle with the girl, Renee. She's shocked and has every right to question the matter." She snarled and mother rolled her eyes, but remained silent.

"Dear, I know that you are surprised but I am telling you now, it is a good possession for you. I have been searching for the perfect bride for my son and I know that it's you whom I have been looking for. You are perfect for my son in every way." Mrs. Cullen said. I looked at her hand in mine and then pulled my hand back from hers; I looked up to see her smile fall as I pulled away from her on the sofa.

"How are you sure? You don't even know me." I said with tears filling my eyes.

"But I know very well, sweetheart. I know that you are a kind, loving, gentle, and would do whatever it took for the ones you love. You are a very good person Isabella," she gushed.

"Bella, I hate to be called Isabella." I said and she smiled, glancing at mother with cold eyes, which softened when she looked back at me.

"Bella, you are perfect for my son. I am assuring you. You will never regret it." She said again and this time I stood up so fast, I was starting to feel faint, my skin was starting to breakout in cold sweat, my hands were shaking, I started seeing black spots dancing in front of me, and my vision started to blur.

"Bella, are you alright dear?" Mrs. Cullen said but I could not answer her.

"Isabella is alright Esme; she only likes acting out of dramatic effect." Mother said coldly. I believe I heard Mrs. Cullen growl, but I could not be positive. I was on the verge of fainting and perhaps I was imagining the whole matter.

"Have a heart Renee; can't you see the poor girl's pale face?" Mrs. Cullen snarled.

"She's always pale." Mother said with nonchalant.

"Bella, dear." Mrs. Cullen stood and took my hand but not before I fell to the ground with a loud thud.

"Bella." Mrs. Cullen screamed out my name. I faintly heard hurried footsteps until I heard Emmett's worried voice.

"Bells, what happened?" he boomed loudly.

Then everything went black.

**Esme**

"Emmett, could you please carry Bella to her room; I will be up in a minute." I said.

He nodded, carrying Bella in his strong arms and walked away to the staircase, but not before shooting an angry glare at his mother. The moment Emmett and Rosalie disappeared out of sight with Bella, I turned my own angry glare at Renee.

"How dare you treat her that way, Renee? She is your daughter for heaven's sake."

She merely shrugged, "She may appear to be an angel, but that girl is an ungrateful little brat." She said her voice laced with venom.

How could a mother be so cruel to her own child?

"I do pray that the marriage arrangement occur as soon as possible, for I want her to be in my house and under my roof to save her from your cruelty." I hissed.

"As long as she is away and the arrangement is settled, I do not care what happens to her. I told you before Esme, I have never wanted children from the start. It was Charles who wanted them. It is a blessing that I have only one girl. Emmett is a man and can depend on himself, even if he lived off of the streets, but Isabella is a girl and would always be a burden if she wasn't taken away in a respectful manner." She said.

I stood frozen in front of her, staring at her in shock. I have never met someone so, so vile, so devious, and to whom, her only child. I would never be that way to my Alice.

"I would have strike you if it weren't for the poor girl waiting for me to attend to her. I am ashamed to say that you do not deserve to have such wonderful children, nor your good husband. Now, if you'll excuse me." I growled storming out of the room and dashing up the stairs.

Bella was awake now, and she was staring out of the window with tears running down her face as she lay on her bed. Emmett and Rosalie were talking with her, attempting to get her to speak to no avail. She was silent, staring ahead of her.

"Emmett, Rosalie, would you mind giving me a moment with Bella?" I asked gently.

"What did she do? What did Renee say to her to have her in such condition?" he snarled. I smiled at the over-protective boy who reminded me so of my Edward in his worry, concern, and love for Alice.

"Just give me a moment with her, please?" I said gently again. He gave a stiff nod and leaned down kissing Bella's forehead. He took Rosalie's hand in his and gave me a pointed look on his way out.

"I am leaving you with her because I trust you, but if she becomes more upset, I will overlook all meanings of politeness. She is my baby sister and I would butcher the whole world if a hair was touched from her head." He said seriously. I smile, yet again reminded of my Edward.

"Have no worries Emmett; I would never hurt Bella. I already see her as my own daughter." I smiled. He nodded and left with Rosalie.

I lay on the bed beside Bella and pulled her to my chest, she started sobbing and her anguished cries shattered my heart. How could a sweet girl like her be treated in such way?

"I don't know what I have ever done to deserve her hatred. I was always a good girl. Always doing what my parents told me, always polite to everyone, yet my own mother treats me as if she never wanted me." She cried.

Oh, precious girl, how right you are. I thought sadly.

"I know that I will have no say in the matter, but I can't marry that way." She said, looking up at me with red teary eyes.

"I don't even know your son; I have never seen him before. I have not fallen in love with him; I – I don't know him." She started crying again and I held her tightly to me.

"Dear, I know how you feel, but as I told you, you are the one for my son. Just trust my words." I said, begging her to see my point of view.

"I can't marry without love; I was always that girl, the girl who dreamt of prince charming, the knight in the shining armor. I am known as the hopeless romantic. I can not marry that way." She cried.

"Oh my precious, believe me, my son is the epitome of charm. You shall see for yourself." I said but felt her go rigid in my arms.

"Are you alright, dear?" I asked.

"You called me precious. She never called me precious. She never even hugged me the way you are hugging me now."

Oh, how I longed to ripe that woman's head off of her body.

"Well, if you like, I would be honored to call you precious from now on." I said.

"You would?" she asked in a small voice.

"Of course," I smiled as she looked at me.

"Does my father know?" she asked and I sighed. As much as good Charles was, he could not escape his wife's talons. She was the reason he was almost insolvent. And the marriage was because I wanted a good wife for my son, in this case, in exchange for a good amount of our money. Charles could not even look me in the eyes when I spoke with him along with my husband, Carlisle. He was crying and cursing himself and his wife for what transpired. He loved his daughter more than anything in the whole world; but he was desperate and needed help.

"He knows but it's necessary for the marriage to happen, for the both of us." I said.

"What for?" she asked and I sighed, deciding on telling her.

I told her everything, all the money her father owed and them being on the verge of loosing all they have. Charles begged me to tell her for he could not tell her himself.

She looked at me with fresh tears in her eyes before nodding her head.

"Alright, if it saves father and Emmett, then I will do it. Forgive me for saying this, but I would not have agreed to this will it be mother in this trouble alone. I am doing this for my father and brother. As for me, it does not matter what happens." She said with a determined voice.

I was very proud of her.

"Of course, what happens to you matters. You shall see, my son is a harmer and both of you will get along very well together." I promised.

She nodded. There was a knock on the door and then Rosalie peeked inside.

"May I come in?" she asked.

"Of course dear, we are done talking for the time being." I turned to Bella, kissing her forehead, "We will be seeing a lot of each other soon, my precious." I said and was filled with joy when a breathtaking smile invaded her face. She nodded and I left her room leaving her with her friend and future sister in law.

As I reached the living room, I heard Emmett's angry voice.

"How could you? Sell her for money? How could father agree to this? It is worst than whoring her out." He snarled.

"That does not concern you, Emmett." Renee spat.

"Like hell it doesn't; She is my sister damnit!" He snarled.

"Watch your mouth!" She snarled back.

"I hate you; I wish father have never married you, you ungrateful woman!" he yelled.

I decided to step in before the worse happens.

"Emmett," I said. He spun around and glared at me.

"You! I trusted you with her and what you d; you buy her for the pleasure of your son. How could you?" I knew he was angry but I would not tolerate those words.

"Mind your tongue young man. I would never do such a thing. I am choosing Bella for my son because she is the perfect woman for him. I would never do anything to harm her. She may not be my flesh and blood, but she is my precious girl. I loved her the moment I saw her and I would treat her as my own." I promised.

"I have no time for this. We agreed on the terms. Excuse me; I have matters to attend to." Renee said walking out of the room. I took Emmett's hand and sat him on the sofa beside me. I started telling him with reason about the arrangement, and I spoke to him about my son. I was half way convincing him. He realized there was no other choice.

"I will be telling you this Mrs. Cullen only once. If and when ever your son hurts her, emotionally, mentally, or physically, I swear on my grandparents' graves I will hunt him down and bury him. She is my baby sister and I will be damned if I let her be hurt." He vowed.

"And I swear to you, she will be treated as a princess. I know the way Renee treats you and I hate it myself. Bella is already my daughter, and I am certain she will be best friends and a sister to my own daughter, Alice. Have no worries, Emmett." I said.

"Alright, I am going to see Bells now. My apologies if I have offended you earlier."

"None of that, Edward would have acted the same way had it been his sister." I smiled. He smiled back and got up walking to the stairs to his sister's room.

Renee appeared out of thin air.

"So, we will be seeing you again, Esme." She said.

"Most certainly, Renee!" I spat her name as if it was a curse word.

"Good, good." She smiled but I kept my face blank, only showing my disgust with her. Not that she cared.

"You have a good day, now. I will be seeing you soon." I said. She nodded, walking me to the front door.

I left the house, promising to do my best to make the young girl happy.


	3. 02.Announcement

**Edward**

 

I was riding on my horse around the forest. It has been one of my most consuming obsessions. Besides reading and taking over our estates, riding was my passion. I would escape from all the work burdening my shoulders and ride my horse for hours. I would go to the waterfall in the middle of the woods, or my secret meadow that no one else knows about.

You would think that a man like myself, with wealth and power would have nothing to escape from but you would be sadly mistaken. I became hateful at the world at the age of eighteen; exactly two years ago. It was when she decided it was better for her to leave me, leave us.

_**Flashback** _

_"What's the matter, darling?" I asked the strawberry blonde goddess lying under me._

_"I cannot do this any longer, Edward." She said._

_"What do you mean?" I asked, moving to lie on my elbows._

_"You can't offer me what I desire. I don't love you anymore, Edward." She said._

_"What?" I asked, staring at her wide-eyed. No, it cannot be. She cannot be saying such a thing. I caressed her cheeks while staring at her still._

_"Tanya, I love you, and you love me too. Please, give me time. I cannot avow to my parents yet about us. Give me some time, please." I begged, unable to stand the thought of her leaving me._

_She stared at me with cold eyes before she sighed._

_"I cannot wait for you, Edward. I must go away with my family. You are fortunate I have not told my parents about what transpired between us; otherwise, you would have been dead by the hands of my father." She said coolly._

_"Tanya, I want to marry you, have a life with you, and children with you. All I ask of you is some time. Please." I begged once more._

_"No, Edward. What we have is finished. I must go now, my mother is expecting me."_

_"No. I will not let you go like this." I grabbed her arm and pulled her to me, falling on the mattress again. I crashed my lips to hers, devouring her in an all-consuming kiss. She responded vigorously while moving her hands on my back, scratching my flesh with her nails. However, the moment my hand reached her heated core she recoiled from me, pushing me away from her and fumbling with her undergarments._

_"I must go now. I do not love you anymore, Edward. You are not enough for me." She stared at my eyes while she got dressed._

_"You are a boy and I need a man who will fulfill my needs in every possible way."_

_Her words were cutting through my heart but I still stared at her with pleading eyes, hoping she would forget the nonsense she was uttering._

_Only her next words shattered me._

_"Especially in bed. I only ever took pity on you when you would be all over me. You never satisfied me, Edward and all the times I climaxed were an act. I always satisfied myself after leaving you." She said with a smirk on her face._

_I pulled back and stared at her with wide eyes. How could she say such things? Emasculating me? Telling me I was weak and feeble. Suddenly, all the hurt was gone and came the anger. I got off of the mattress and put on my robe. I was a satisfying man and I knew my own strength, and if she did not climax as she claims, then it's her own flaw._

"Get out of my house and never return." I said in an eerily calm voice. She glared at me and then got up, put on the rest of her clothing and walked to my bedchamber door. Only before leaving my room she turned and smirked at me.

_"Good bye, Edward. It was fun while it lasted." She grinned and then left._

_**End of flashback** _

After those years, after her hurtful words, I still loved her.

A fool, I know. But you cannot control your heart.

I rode back to my parent's house and put my horse back in it's stall. I could feel eyes on me and I turned around to see my mother looking at me with an unfathomable look in her eyes. She smiled once she saw me and walked toward me. I closed the stall's door and met her half way as she wrapped her arms around me and kissed my cheek.

"How was your ride, sweetheart?" She asked with her tender, motherly voice.

"It was alright, mother. How was your afternoon?" I asked and she had two expressions on her face; one of sheer happiness and one of sheer sadness.

I, of course, picked up on the sad face first.

"What's the matter? Are you alright? Did something happen?" She laughed at my rambling questions.

"I'm perfect, my dear boy. But there was a subject I wanted to discuss with you." She said. I nodded and walked her back to our house. We entered the living room and I was surprised to see father sitting by the fireplace as he was supposed to be at the hospital still. ******** He smiled once he saw mother and she went to sit by him, she smiled back and gave him a gentle kiss before both of them turned to gaze at me with hopeful eyes. Alright, now they have caught my full attention.

"Is something the matter?" I asked as I gazed back at them.

"There was something we wanted to speak to you about, son. Have a seat." Father said quietly and I nodded, walking cautiously and sitting on the chair beside the fireplace. They kept gazing at me with such intensity that I started to feel uncomfortable. Father cleared his throat and started to speak.

"Edward, you know how much your mother and I love you, and we would do everything that we could to make you happy and safe." He started and for some unattainable reason, I didn't like the path of his words.

"Yes," I started slowly. Mother sighed heavily and I looked at her.

"And you know how long I have searched for a bride for you." She said.

That's when I understood.

"I'm guessing you have found me one?" I asked quirking my eyebrow at her.

"Yes. I have." She said with caution. They both knew how much I hated speaking of this matter, how much I loathed their persistence of me finding a bride and marrying.

I was not thinking of marriage.

Not anyone but her.

Tanya.

However, that was out of the question, according to her words.

"No." I said with finality. Mother sighed.

"Edward, she's the sweetest girl you could ever meet. She's kind, loving, and the most beautiful girl. I am not asking for your permission, I am simply telling you. You are marrying Isabella." She said.

"Isabella?" I asked, not recognizing the name.

"Yes, Isabella Swan." she said and suddenly it all came to my mind.

"I'm guessing she's marrying me for the money." I spat knowing the debt her father was facing. They were on the verge of being broke, merely holding on by a thread thanks to their small horse ranch.

"I am not going to lie to you, yes. But only because her father and brother are good men and they need the money. Her mother, on the other hand; is a hateful witch who I wish dies a horrible death." I stared at mother in shock. She never spoke about anyone in such a way and her anger and disgust at speaking about Isabella's mother was such that I was a little curious as to why she hated her mother so.

"Does Isabella know about all of this?" I asked.

"Yes, but we have agreed we would not speak of it. You both marry and live your lives normally like a loving married couple. And you WILL be good to the girl, understand?" She pressed, her eyes narrowing at me.

What was it about this Isabella that brought out the mother hen in my mother?

"I don't want to marry her." I said, for the first time allowing myself to be vulnerable in front of my parents. "I don't want to marry someone I don't love." I hedged.

"Oh, dear boy." Mother left father's side and kneeled in front of me.

"She is a lovely girl and I am certain that you will fall in love with her once you see her. She is the sweetest thing." She caressed my cheeks with her hands.

"But I do not even know her. I have no idea what she even looks like." I exclaimed.

"You will see her tomorrow." She said.

"So soon?" I asked, knowing that the matter was sealed and I was only hanging onto straws. Mother smiled at me.

"Yes. You will see her and she will see you. You both are perfect for each other. Trust me on this, Edward." She said, but I was having none of it.

"No." I shot up from my chair, causing mother to startle and stand up quickly.

"Edward," father warned me with a stern voice.

"No. I refuse. I will not marry some girl because she is in need of my money. I will not marry her." I snarled.

"Mind your tone, boy. I may be patient with you now, but I am telling you." Mother stood in front of me, glaring at me with such fire that I froze in my place. (Did Esme or Carlisle say this line?)

"You. Will. Marry. Her." She said slowly and vigorously.

"I. Will. Not." I said with the same vigor. We stared at each other for a few moments before I turned around to leave.

But her next words stopped me in my tracks.

"If you don't marry her, we will disown you." Mother spat.

I turned around slowly, staring at her with shock evident on my face.

"W- what?" I blabbered. Surely she was joking, or I misheard her. I stared at her with wide eyes and she stared back with determination. I looked at father to see him grasping her shoulder and squeezing it.

"You heard me, young man. Don't believe for one second that I don't know about your disgraceful affair with Tanya." She hissed and I gasped, blinking rapidly.

_She knew? How could she?_

"How? What? How did you know?" I choked.

"A mother knows these things, Edward. And I'm deeply disappointed in you for putting yourself in such a position. What would you have done if she were to scandalize you? Or worse, become with child, your child?" She snarled and I narrowed my eyes at her.

"I would have married her. I wanted to marry her, but she refused. She wouldn't give me time to come and speak with you about us." I snarled back and she gasped, raising her hand and putting it on her mouth.

"You were thinking of marrying her? How could you? She's not fit to be a proper wife or mother." She whimpered.

"And this Isabella is?" I glared at her.

"Of course. The girl is a valuable jewel and you will be the luckiest man when you marry her."

"I SAID I WILLNOT MARRY HER." I screamed at the top of my lungs. This time, it was my father who stood up to me. In a blink of an eye, he was in front of me grasping my shoulders and glaring at me with such anger that would have made me crumble to dust.

"Listen to me boy, and listen carefully. You will NOT and I repeat, NOT speak to your mother in such a disrespectful way again. She only seeks what is best for you. And as for the Tanya subject, we would have never agreed for you to marry her. She and her family are not the best to suit us or any other respectful family. They are vicious, pigheaded, and social climbers and they would only let their daughter marry you for your money." He growled.

"And Isabella is marrying me because of her undying love for me? She wants me for my money, your money." I said, but my voice was weak knowing I was unable to let loose of the matter.

"Your mother would have chosen her even if her family was not in need of our money. She is the perfect girl for you and you WILL marry her. Understand?" He snarled.

"I don't get any say in this?" I asked, grasping at straws again.

"NO." He deadpanned. I nodded and looked at mother who had tears in her eyes. I couldn't speak to her. She was forcing me into a loveless marriage with a girl I don't know, who is only marrying me for my money.

"May I please be excused?" I asked, feeling weak and tired and wanting to return to my chamber. Father let go of my arms and nodded. I walked to the stairs and was about to climb, when my mother grabbed my arm tenderly. I turned and looked at her to find tears cascading on her cheeks.

"It's for your own good, dear. You will see when you meet her tomorrow." She whispered.

"It doesn't matter. I'm only marrying her for the title of being married, and I believe that both of you would be expecting a child as soon as we're married, yes?" I asked, knowing their desperate wish to have a grandchild.

"We will speak of it later. When you've seen her with more sense and wits in your mind." She promised. I looked at her with numbness and gently detached myself from her motherly touch.

"I'm going to sleep. Inform me when we must leave to see my new bride." I said sardonically.

"You will come around, Edward. And one day, you will thank me for it." Mother smiled.

"I doubt it. Good night, Mother. Father." I said, running up the stairs and to my room, slamming the door behind me.

Tomorrow, I will go to see this Isabella girl, I will do as mother says and treat her like the wife she will be; I will bed her and have children with her.

_But I will never LOVE her…_


	4. 03. Family Talk

**Bella**

 

I sat on my bed, thinking over what Mrs. Cullen told me. My family was facing bankruptcy, almost running out of all the money we had, all because my precious mother wanted a new dress or a nice trendy hat. She was draining my father dry, taking all his money, and because he was madly in love with her and was unable to day NO to her, he is barely hanging by a thread, only with the help of our small horse ranch.

In addition, of course, my mother runs off to the first person to have an opportunity to make more money. To her, it was an excellent opportunity; to me it was an indecent proposal, even if it was coming from such a kindhearted woman such as Mrs. Cullen.

"Bells, are you alright?" I was pulled out of my reverie by my brother's voice.

"Yes. I'm perfect." I said, my voice slightly wavering.

"No you aren't. Talk to me, sis." He sat beside me, pulling Rosalie into his arms and hugging her. I quickly looked away, knowing that I will never have what they have. I will never have a man who loves me and cares for me the way Emmett does Rosalie. I will never fall in love because I am doomed to marry a man, whom I do not know, a man who knows that I am only marrying him for his money.

_I was going to be stubbed a gold digger._

Emmett looked at me with his blue eyes, pleading for me to speak.

"It's nothing, Emmett. I'm alright." I whispered. He sighed and stared at me.

"I talked to Mrs. Cullen." He said and I stared back.

"What about?" I attempted nonchalance, but he was not fooled.

"I know about the arrangement Renee made with her. Bella, you can't marry her son out of need. We are doing well with the horse ranch, and we don't need for you to marry someone for his money." He insisted.

"We need the money, Emmett. It's the only way for us to survive," I said, my voice weak with defeat. Emmett's jaw clenched tightly and his hands balled into tight fists. It was not a good thing for him to be angry. I feared terribly for my brother's wellbeing. Being angry at all times was bound to make him weary.

"It most certainly _not_ the only option. I already work at the ranch, and I can search for another work with more money, just don't do this, Bella," he said in a soft voice. I looked at my big brother, with teary, tired eyes.

"You can't do that, Emmett. Have you forgotten that you and Rose are to be married soon? The money, which you will earn, will be better left for your future life as a husband and a father. Moreover, as for myself, it does not matter; so long as you and father are well, nothing else matters to me." I concluded, my voice brimming with finality.

_Only Rosalie's next words shattered my world, more so than it already was._

"What about Jasper?" she asked, her eyes hard somewhat as she stared at me.

"Jasper will be alright. He _will_ find someone else, who is better and more suitable for him. He _will_ love her and she _will_ love him, and he _will_ be happy. With or _without_ me," I said, my voice shaking at the last sentence. Rosalie's glare became that more cold as she kept staring at me. Emmett's hand squeezed Rosalie's as she kept glaring,

"Is that what Jasper will return to, then? Finding you married to another man? A man who you _don't_ know? I believe that you are aware of Jasper's intentions, once he returns from the army, he would ask for your hand. What do you think it will make him feel once he realizes that you are no longer available? That you are _married_?" she spat, he voice filled with accusation, and if I am not mistaken, hatred. I stared at her with wide eyes, unable to fathom how she could be so cruel to me. I had no say in this matter and she knew it. She knew that once Renee set her mind to something, _nothing_ and _no one_ will be able to stand up to her.

_Not even Father._

"How dare you, Rosalie? How dare you accuse me of treachery for not waiting for Jasper? You know more than anyone else does that I have no say in the matter, which Renee already spoke with Mrs. Cullen, that she agreed with her for me to marry her son. Father will not object, because _we_ are in need of the money. You do not feel the way we will feel because you are wealthy, and if you were wealthier than the Cullens, Renee would have literally threw me at Jasper's feet, but she decided to throw me at the Cullens feet because they were with more money. So, don't you dare accuse me of doing this willingly," I screamed, jumping from the bed and pacing the room back and forth, "you will marry the man you love, you will be happy with him, and you will raise family with him because you want to. I will marry a man out of _obligation_. A man whom I don't know what kind of a person he truly is, a man who wants me as a mere vessel to procreate children for him. Once he gets bored of me, he will search for a mistress to extinguish his boredom with me. I _will_ be alone and heartbroken for the rest of my life, so don't you _are_ reprimand me about Jasper. You all will get what you want, and I will have _NOTHING."_ I screamed, tears spilling down my face as sobs raked my body. Rosalie was staring at me with pity, as she stood up, walking toward me, and trying to pull me into her arms,

"Don't you dare come near me; you have made your point clear, Rosalie." I snarled, glaring at her with fiery venom. I looked at Emmett, who was frowning at Rosalie, his eyes turned to me and I saw again, _pity_ in his eyes. I screamed at the top of my lungs, throwing vases and books around the room.

"Get out. Leave me alone, and get out!" I yelled at them, pushing Rosalie out of my room. Emmett was going to stop me, but I threw a vase at him.

"GET OUT!" I screamed. He literally ran out of my room, dragging a struck Rosalie behind him. They thought this was hilarious, or solvable; but it was not.

I was going to live in pain and agony for the rest of my life.

I ran to the door, slamming it shut, and then threw myself on my bed, sobbing my heart out into my pillow.

_Sometime in the eve_

I felt a hand running through my hair as I slept. My body was so cold, and my cheeks were stinging me from the tears. I slowly opened my eyes, hissing in pain as it hurt to blink. The hand kept running through my hair as a deep voice kept murmuring.

"I am so sorry, Bella. I am so very sorry," father's voice shook with emotion.

"Daddy?" I whisper/asked, looking up at him. He gave a weak smile as he caressed my cheek.

"I am here, lovely girl," he whispered. I sat up slowly, clutching his nightshirt in my hand. His eyes were filled with unshed tears as he stared at me.

"Don't do it, Bella. I am a big man and I can handle my own. Don't marry Edward Cullen," he whispered, but from the tune of his voice, I knew that I had no other choice. I gave a small smile, and patted his hand.

"I have too, father. I am the only hope you have left. In addition, with Renee's presence, I fear what might happen to you when she keeps asking preposterous demands." I deadpanned. He sighed heavily, shaking his head remorsefully.

"It's all my fault. If was not a weak man in front of her, I would have been able to save you from such fate. And you would have been preparing your marriage to Jasper," he said. I looked down, blushing. He lifted my chin with his fingers, and a sad smile broke onto his face.

"I know of Jasper's intentions before he left for the army. He spoke with me and I gave him my blessing. Moreover, I am aware of how disappointed in me, and heartbroken with you for coming home to find you married. If I could, I would have let you marry before he left, however, your mother threatened me, if I were to give you to him and she will leave and take you away from me. Like she had done before."

_My hatred to Renee intensified after hearing of this._

"Don't call her that; she is no longer my mother. I am only doing this for your sake, and Emmett's. He still needs money for his wedding to Rosalie, and the money he takes from the ranch, and his other job is not that much reliable. He needs more."

Father's eyes blinked, and a few tears strayed down his cheeks. He pulled me into his arms and squeezed me tightly. I hugged him back just as tightly, breathing in his fatherly scent, that I always loved.

"I am so proud of you, baby girl, and I promise you, I will do whatever it takes to make you happy.I know that your marriage to Edward is inevitable, and I _know_ that he is a good boy, but I also know that you don't want this marriage; therefore, whenever you need me there, I will be on your doorstep in the blink of an eye. It is the least I could do to repay you for what you are doing for me and your brother." His voice broke as he finished. I pulled back, my own tears making my vision blurry.

"Do not speak in such way, father. I will do whatever I can to help you and Emmett." I sniffled, hugging him back, "always," I concluded. I felt him nod against my head.

"I owe you too much, baby girl. And I know that I have no _right_ to ask of you anything else, but could you stop calling me father?" I pulled back, staring at him in confusion, he smiled as he went on, "I want you to call me Daddy; at all times." He smiled. I smiled back, nodding and hugging him back once more.

"Of course, _daddy_. Whatever you want." I promised.

"Thank you, baby girl. I love you," he chocked, holding onto me tightly.

"I love you too, daddy," I hugged him even tighter, like my life depended on it.

"You are an angel, Bella. I am positive that Edward, once he knows the real you, he will fall madly in love with you, and I am certain he is a good boy. His parents are jewels." He whispered,

"Yes. Mrs. Cullen is a nice woman from when I spoke with her, and from what I heard Dr. Cullen is a good man." I whispered back.

"It will all work for the best, angel." He kissed my forehead, "now I am going to leave you to sleep. You must be tired from the day. Sweet dreams, angel." He kissed my cheeks, and hugged me one last time. I kissed his cheeks, and hugged him back.

"Good night, Daddy." I smiled; he smiled back and got up, left my room, and closed the door behind him.

I may not like what I am destined to do, but I would do it.

_For daddy and Emmett, I would do it._

_Next day_

It was fifteen minutes after eight in the morning when I woke up. The blinds were open, as I forgot to close them before going back to sleep last night. The shiny sunlight was invading my room, lightning it while my insides were _dark._ I could hear the birds chirping a beautiful melody while standing on the trees.

_They should be singing an obituary, I thought._

I shook my head, attempting to remove the morbid thoughts out of my head. I am already doomed, so I might as well toughen myself and work with it.

I sighed heavily, got off the bed, and put on my robe. I walked out of my room, and walked to the bathroom. I washed my face, brushed my hair, and then went back to my room. I took out fresh undergarments, a dark green dress, and a green slipper. I took off my robe, nightgown, and started getting dressed. I have decided to forgo the corset for the morning. _Surely, Renee will have me wear it before meeting Edward._

I cringed at the thought. I hated corsets, and I hated the idea of meeting _Edward_ for the first time; it was as if he were coming to look a purchase, a horse he wishes to buy. In a way, I was exactly _that. Damn you, Renee._

I may go to hell for cursing my mother ( _cringe when thinking the word)_ , but she deserves nothing less for the suffering she's putting us all through.

I sighed again, putting on my slippers. I went to my vanity, brushed my hair into a braid, and then left my room. As I descended the stairs, I could hear Renee screaming at the servants, whom I am certain were wishing for her impending doom, just as much as I did.

"My god, does any of you has brilliance? The house must be perfect by noon, or else all of you will be sacked out." She kept screaming, her shrilling voice giving me a headache. I decided to go into the kitchen, and make myself a teacup. I could hear the servants whining and lamenting, but once I entered the kitchen, they all fell into silence. I sighed, walking directly to range. I filled the teakettle with water, and left it to boil. The servants were murmuring quietly, some I could hear what they were speaking, other I could not.

_"Poor child,", "how could she do this to her own girl?", "at least she will get good money from it." *giggle*_

I whipped my head so fast to the person speaking the last sentence. _Jessica_ was giggling still, speaking without shame to Mallory, who was staring at me with wide, fearful eyes. Jessica must have notice Mallory's stare, because she turned around, only to find me standing right in front of her face. _I have no idea how I walked the few steps to her._ She had the audacity to smirk at me. Jessica never liked me, it was no secret; but to imply me whoring myself out that way; she might not have spoken it in literal, but the implication was there. Her smirk fell from her face, surely after seeing how angry I was. She opened her mouth to speak, only to be silenced with the palm of my hand. The slap echoed through the kitchen, everyone was standing in silence; the tension was too thick, that if you will, you could cut it with a knife.

"Mind your tongue, Jessica. Or would you like me to tell mother of the food and money you _were_ stealing?" I glared at her, my nostrils flaring in anger, and my face hot with boiling blood pumping through my veins.

Her eyes widened in fear, and a pleading look invaded her eyes.

"Apologize to Miss Bella, Jessica. _Now._ " Mrs. Cope, our housekeeper snarled.

"I- I am sorry, Miss Swan," Jessica stuttered. I gave her another death glare, and then turned on my heels, the tea all but forgotten. I maybe a gentle doll as people might say, but I could also be a fierce lioness if someone wronged me, and when it was in my ability to put them in their place.

I walked into the living room, to find Renee on the letter desk, a pen in hand, and she was writing furiously. Emmett was nowhere in sight, but Rosalie was sitting by the fireplace. She looked up, her eyes meeting mine. I looked away, still angry and hurt by what she said. I turned around and walked toward the door, only to be stopped by _Renee._

"Isabella, come here at once girl," she yelled. I sighed, clenched and unclenched my fists. I walked back to the living room, going to Renee. She was sealing the letter she was writing, a smile on her overly red lips. _Too much, rouge, again._

"ALEC," she screamed, causing me and Rosalie to jump. I rolled my eyes at her; she could call onto people quietly every now and then,

"Yes, Mrs. Swan?" Alec, our old butler answered. He was in hid-fifties, and a good, kind man.

"Take this letter to Mrs. Cullen, at once," she chirped. I resisted the urge to cringe at the sound of her squeaky voice. You could break glass with that voice,

"Right away, Mrs. Swan," Alec said, giving me a sympathetic smile. I smiled back at him, and then he left.

"Isabella, what on earth are you wearing?" Renee shrieked, causing me to cringe fully this time. I knew what she was referring at; hence, I decided to play dumb.

"A dress?" I answered, making it sound like a question. Rosalie concealed her laugh with a cough, as she clamped a hand over her mouth. I felt the side of my mouth twitch, but I resisted the urge to laugh.

"This is unacceptable, Isabella," she practically whined. She walked toward me, grabbing me by the arms, and squeezing tightly. I winced in pain as her nails dug into the exposed flesh of my forearms.

"I will not have you ruining this chance for me, Isabella. You are to go upstairs, change this ridiculous dress, and put on the _best_ dress you have. Put on the dark _blue_ dress and for the love of god, wear the corset; and don't eat like pigs in front of your groom." She warned. I rolled my eyes at her.

"Of course, we don't want to have the mighty Renee look bad," I spoke before thinking. _Big mistake._

"You will not speak to me in such way again, Isabella. You will be a polite, submissive, and obedient girl in front of Mrs. Cullen and her son, or else you know what I am capable of," she snarled, narrowing her eyes at me, and digging her nails in my flesh with more vigor. I winced again, the pain bringing tears to my eyes. I nodded my head, feeling the blood rush through my arms once more when she released me. She pushed me aside, walking out of the room, but not before speaking again.

"Get ready now, girl. It takes time to turn ugliness into beauty; and be helpful Rosalie, instead of laughing, dress her up." She ordered, and then went outside.

My vision was blurry, and I felt my cheeks wet with tears as I stared after her. Her words hurt more than they should. I knew I was plain, not beautiful, but also not ugly. My hair was the conventional dark brown, my chocolate brown eyes were dull, and my skin was as pale as the dead were. I knew I was not as beautiful as Rosalie was, and I was content with what I am, but to hear her utter the word _ugly_ and connect it to me, it hurt more than I wanted to admit.

"Don't listen to her, Bella. You are _beautiful._ You know how hateful she is. Please don't listen to what she's saying," Rosalie hugged me from my back, squeezing me in a soothing manner. I squeezed her back, feeling more tears falling down my face.

"Come on, let's get you prepared," Rosalie said in a quiet voice. I just nodded, letting her pull me up the stairs, and into my room.

She went straight to my closet, after sitting me down on the bed. She kept rummaging through my dresses, until she found the right one. It was a navy blue, with a white ruffle at the chest, the chest was a little too low for my liking, showing a little of the tops of my breasts, it was sleeveless with a chiffon belt around the waist. It was the dress that showed the color of my skin in the best ways, not making me look half past dead. Rosalie took out my white and pink corset, along with blue-heeled shoes.

"Now, let's get started, shall we?" she gave a small smile. I gave a grimace that intended to be a smile and nodded. Standing up and walking toward the vanity. Rosalie helped me take off my dress and slipper. I was standing in my undergarments, when she spoke.

"I am sorry, Bella," she began, "I was out of line when I spoke to you in such way last night. I love you, and I know that you are helping Charlie and Emmett with what you're doing; but I also love my brother very much, and I know how much he will hurt once he knows of the news." She whispered, her voice wavering. Rosalie was the strongest person I knew, and she would never show weakness to anyone, but whenever she did, it was for the strongest reasons.

"I know, Rose, but there is nothing I could do. What's done is done, and there's no changing it," I whispered back, feeling the tears prick my eyes again.

"I know. I am sorry Bella. Let's not fight again, please." She begged, I turned around and hugged her tightly. She hugged me back, her body shaking with her crying.

"Jasper will be alright, Rose. He will forget about it and heal." I hoped,

"I only hope so." She nodded, pulling back and smiling, "Now, let us start,"

Two hours later, and I was ready. My hair was up in a styled, fashioned bun, with few wavy ringlets falling down my face. My pale pink lips were a darker shade of red, and my cheeks were dark pink from all the pinching Rose has done. My skin was flawless, and translucent, I looked down at me arms and sighed; Renee's nails had left dark, angry red marks what turned blue in a split second. I bruised easily, and my skin would be black and blue in an instant, and since my dress was sleeveless, Rose had to cover the crescent shaped bits by powder, or else Renee would rip off our heads if the scars were obvious. My dress was perfect, and the corset was not as tight as what Renee might have knotted it. Rose wanted me to breathe just as much as I wanted to. Rose opened a vial of perfume, and sprinkled it on my dress and skin. I smelled of roses and gardenia. Rose took a step back, and admired her handiwork.

"Now, you are officially prepared and as beautiful as ever." She smiled. Of course, I blushed. The person standing in front of the mirror was not a girl, she was a beautiful woman. Her eyes were wide, and her stance was immaculate, if not slightly nervous.

"That Edward man will be a fool if he did not fall to his knees once he sees you," Rose boasted.

"Let's hope it goes well, or Renee would invent a reason for the failure and blame it on me." I sighed, looking at Rose in the mirror.

"Alright, it's almost time. Let us go." She smiled, walking to the door. When she opened it, we saw Renee was about to barge in.

"What took you so long, girl? I swear Isabella, if you ruin this, your life will be hell." She snarled. I clenched my jaw to stop myself from lashing out. I took a deep breath, and put a forced smile on my face.

"I am ready, mother," I said in a too sweet voice. _No need for trouble now._

"Alright. Go down and wait for me in the living room. Rosalie, go home, and Isabella sit with Mrs. Cullen. Her son will be here shortly." She hissed before walking to her chamber. Rose and I looked at each other, rolled our eyes, and walked down the stairs.

Mrs. Cullen was sipping on her tea when we entered the living room. She smiled widely when she saw me and Rose enter.

"My sweet girls, you are so lovely," she beamed, hugging Rose first, who stared at me in shock as I shrugged at her mouthing _she's nice_. Then Mrs. Cullen turned to me, staring at me with an even wider smile.

"My sweet child. You are so beautiful. You are perfect," she exclaimed, pulling me into her arms in a bone-crushing hug. I blinked back tears as I remembered the bad words Renee said. Rose noticed and shook her head in disapproval, mouthing _don't._ I nodded, and smiled a little. Mrs. Cullen was the mother I have always wanted.

We sat on the couch, Rose and I on either side of Mrs. Cullen,

"How are you today, dear?" she asked, her motherly voice caressing me like a velvet quilt.

"I am alright, Mrs. Cullen," I gave a smiled,

"Bella, how many times must I tell you? Call me Esme, Mrs. Cullen is my _mother-in-law_." She laughed, Rose and me joining in.

"Alright, Esme," I said with a smile.

"And what about you, darling? All is well with Emmett?" she asked Rose,

"Yes, Esme. Everything is perfect. We are marrying soon, once everything is ready." Rose beamed. I looked away, not able to stand the reminder that I am to be married out of obligation, not love.

I felt a squeeze to my hand, looking up I saw Esme with a smile on her face.

"I assure you, dear, Edward is a wonderful boy, and I am not only saying that because he is my son; but it's the truth. He is wonderful, and you both shall see what a beautiful perfect match you are," she grinned. I smiled back, not having the heart to upset her.

Of course, she is saying this because he is her son, and any _good_ mother would say her child is perfect, even if he was filled with flaws.

"Things will turn out for the best, darling. And I know that you will be best friends with my daughter too. Alice wanted to come with me, but it was best to have this visit with Edward alone. You will meet her soon enough." She smiled, looking at Rose,

"And I am certain that you will be good friends with her too, Rose. Especially if you care for fashion." Esme concluded. Rose let out a squeal, and I rolled my eyes.

"She likes fashion?" Rose's high-pitched voice nearly deafened me.

Esme's bell like laugh made me smile as she spoke to Rose,

"Yes, my dear. She _loves_ fashion. She even makes her own dresses. I wouldn't be surprised if one day she were to be a famous fashion designer," Esme and Rose laughed and again, I rolled my eyes.

"You don't like fashion, Bella?" Esme asked with an amused expression.

I shook my head vigorously. She laughed again,

"Wait until you meet Alice, she will literally shove fashion traits down your throat,"

I stared at her with fearful eyes, and then shook my head as she and Rose laughed at me.

_Suddenly, the doorbell rang._

"That must be Edward," Esme smiled, getting up. Renee appeared out of nowhere, running into the living room.

"Stay in your place Mrs. Cullen. Isabella will open the door." She spoke rudely, glaring at me.

_How could be so rude to Esme, when she was giving her the opportunity of her life?_

I sighed, throwing a glance at Rose who was in turn glaring at Renee; Mrs. Cullen was no different. I nodded, walking out of the living room, and slowly approaching the front door.

I stood in front of the door, and I could see a shadow from underneath it. I could hear the neighing of a horse, as I took a deep breath. I said a silent prayer to the God above, and then opened the door.

_Nothing prepared me to the sight in front of me…_


	5. 04. First Sight

_***~Bella~*** _

 

_*~Previously~*_

 

I stood in front of the door, and I could see a shadow from underneath it. I could hear the neighing of a horse, as I took a deep breath. I said a silent prayer to the God above, and then opened the door.

_Nothing prepared me to the sight in front of me…_

Standing before me was the _handsomest, most beautiful_ man I have ever laid eyes on. He was the epitome of _male beauty;_ he was dressed fashionably. He was wearing a double-breasted black tailcoat with turned-back cuffs and a matching high collar of velvet; his coat-sleeves were puffed at the shoulder. He was also wearing a white waistcoat, shirt, cravat, and pantaloons. His hat was adorning his head, leaving few loose strands of what seemed to be the softest hair a man could ever possess. I looked up quickly when I heard, _Edward_ clear his throat, and blushed profusely when I realized he had caught me staring at him. He stared at me with the most intense green eyes I have ever seen; it was the color of green shiny emerald, with golden fleck in the middle. I blinked rapidly as I stared back at him, a small _smirk_ spread across his face as he scrutinized me, as I him.

"Miss Swan, I presume?" he asked, his voice was like melted _honey._

_What was wrong with me? I have never been that shallow._

"Yes," I cleared my throat embarrassingly as my voice was hoarse, "Yes, I am,"

We stared at each other for a few more minutes, or hours, or days, I had no idea, but our contact was rudely interrupted when _Renee_ hollered my name,

she yelled, probably waking the dead. I sighed heavily, shaking my head. _Edward_ gave me a confused look, and I gave a weak smile.

"Would you like to come in?" I asked, feeling my face heat again,

"Of course, thank you." He smiled crookedly at me, making my heart pound furiously in my chest as he entered the house. I closed the door behind me and turned around to find him standing behind me and staring still. He stepped aside and let me pass in front of him, gesturing politely with his hand. I smiled shyly and walked in deliberate steps into the living room.

As we entered the room, I saw Renee's fuming eyes glaring at me, her cheeks were flushed with anger, and her stance was rigid. _Prepare for the blow._ I thought.

"What have you been doing all this time, girl? I hope you haven't done anything to embarrass us in front of _Edward,_ I know how stupid you get all the time," she hissed.

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath, and _praying_ for a hole to break into the ground and swallow me whole. Even now, she cannot contain her need to humiliate me. I reopened my eyes to see Esme glaring at Renee, and I actually saw Esme's teeth showing.

I prepared myself for Esme's verbal defense.

_Only I was surprised to hear his velvety voice._

"It was my fault, Mrs. Swan. Miss Swan was waiting for me to tie the rope of my horse to the fence, which is why we were late to come inside." Edward's smooth voice answered, only I could sense a certain edge to it. Renee seemed to be baffled by Edward's voice and presence. She blinked rapidly for a few times, and then a smirk spread across her face; she kept staring at him with _flirtatiousness? Was she serious? He was going to marry her daughter for god's sake. And she was married to my FATHER._

"Of course, darling, I just happen to _know_ how idiotic my daughter can get," she actually batted her eyelashes at him.

_I wanted to vomit._

"On the contrary, I believe Miss Swan is a smart young woman, hence idiocy is nowhere in her traits;" he went on, his voice earning more edge with each word. I looked at him, to find him glaring at Renee, his intense green eyes almost firing greenery flames at her. I stared at him with shock. We were practically strangers, and here he was, _defending_ me in front of Renee?

 _Isn't he a gentleman?_ My subconscious mused. I internally rolled my eyes at my thoughts _._

Renee seemed either oblivious to Edward's venomous stance, or she simply did not care. She smiled widely at him, her eyes glowing with mischief as she let her eyes roam him up and down. I felt sick to my core, watching my mother looking at another man in such way, a man who was as _old_ as her _son_ was, and a man who was to be her _son-in-law_.

_Suddenly, I thought what was between Father and Renee was more than debt issues to be the reason for her tepidness towards father._

Suddenly, she looked at Rosalie, and glared at her.

"I believe I _asked_ you to go back home, Rosalie, have I not?" Renee spat. Rose rolled her eyes, glaring back at Renee. She turned to Esme, gave her a big hug, and a kiss on both cheeks,

"It was an honor to meet you, Esme, I can't wait to meet Alice as well." She smiled,

"The pleasure was all mine, dear, and you _will_ meet my Ali soon I guarantee," Esme beamed, as she kissed Rose's cheeks. Rose turned to me, giving a nod at Edward, who nodded back politely; she walked toward me, linking her arm with mine.

"Walk me out, Bella," she said, scowling at Renee. She quickly dragged me out to the front door, opening it, and stepping out with me by her side.

" _OH MY GOD! Did you see him, Bella? He is a fine specimen of a man. I swear if I was not madly in love with Emmett, I would have dragged him to the nearest room, and have my wicked, wicked way with him," she purred, her eyes gleaming._

"Rose!" I exclaimed, blushing at her words, and feeling a strange tightening in my chest; I did not like seeing Edward with another woman, not even Rose.

_I wonder why that is._

"He is a very _good looking_ man, Bella. Good luck not turning into a pile of goo in front of him. Moreover, try _gauging_ Renee's eyes out, she was flirting shamelessly with him. What is the matter with that _woman_?" she asked, I sighed, shrugging my shoulders. She was about to say something, when Renee shrieked for the millionth time today, yelling for me to come inside.Rose rolled her eyes, and then hugged me.

"I had better go, before she comes out with a sledgehammer after us. I will talk to you soon, and you _will_ give me all the details regarding the handsome _Edward Cullen,_ " she winked at me, kissing my cheek, and then walked away to her house.

I was a blushing mess when I went back inside. Esme, and Edward were sitting on the couch, Renee was nowhere in sight. I breathed a sigh of relief as I entered the sitting room. Edward's head snapped in my direction, when I entered, and a beautiful smile spread across his face as he saw without a doubt, my blushing cheeks.

_I hated the fact I blushed all the time,_

"Bella, come sit beside me, dear." Esme smiled, sitting aside, to leave me a room to sit beside her. I walked deliberately, fearful I would trip on my own dress, and fall onto my face. _That would be horrible to happen in front of Edward._

I sat beside Esme, aware of Edward's eyes on my face. I could feel a strange electric heat floating around me as he kept staring. I could feel my flesh heat with the intensity of his stare, feeling my scalp prick with fire. I dared not look at him, or I would have fainted in my place.

Renee barged into the room, huffing in annoyance,

"The servants are worthless. I should fire them all for their incompetence," she huffed, rolling her eyes. I shook my head at her dramatic antiques, noticing from the corner of my eyes, Edward glaring again at her, his face set in a permanent scowl as he looked at her. I saw Esme squeeze his knee once, making him relax somewhat. He then suddenly, snapped his green eyes at me. I blushed of course, looking away quickly.

"Esme, don't you believe the children would like to have some privacy?" Renee asked, giving Edward another flirtatious look. I pursed my lips, forcing myself not to _throw up,_ I have no idea how she could be so crude.

"Yes, they do," Esme practically growled, causing Renee to look at her with a confused expression on her face.

_Did she seriously believe Esme did not notice the way she was ogling her son?_

"Edward, would you be a dear, and take Bella for a walk?" Esme asked, giving Edward a smile. He gave a small smile, nodding, and standing up. He stood in front of me, his hand outstretched in front of him. His eyes were pouring into mine, searching into the depth of my soul. I blushed once more, putting my cool hand in his. His hand was warm, and large; easily enveloping mine in his, and securing it in his grip.

"Shall we?" he spoke in susurration, his voice enveloping me in a warm cocoon. I took a deep breath, nodding.

"We shall," I answered, not wanting to look foolish in front of him. We walked to the front door, him opening it, and letting me walk out first. I blushed as I saw his eyes following my every move as I walked; he walked out of the door, and closed it behind him. He put my hand in the crook of his arm, and we started walking around the neighborhood. Our house was surrounded with trees, and greenery. Lush and abundance roads, filled with sunflowers, and other various roses.

Edward walked me through the trees, every now and then; I would catch him glancing at me from the corner of my eyes.

After about ten minutes walking, we stopped by a small wooden like shack; only it was consisting in four dark maroon obelisks, topped with a triangle roof. There were no doors, or windows. It was openly sitting in the middle of a large garden.

_It was the most thing I loved here. I always played here with daddy when I was little._

Edward walked me to a wooden bench, sat me first, and then sat beside me.

We sat together, in a somewhat awkward silence. At times, I would stare at my hands, knotted by my lap, and in other times, I would look around me, letting my eyes take in the beauty surrounding me. I never glanced at Edward, not once. However, I could feel his eyes on me; I could feel the potency of his stares as he stared at me. The same electric fire I felt before, was consuming me once more. My hands started to shake as I did my best to remain calm in my seat, hoping he would not notice how shaky I was becoming. I felt him move slightly beside me, and then his cool hand was on mine, squeezing lightly. I looked up to look at him, and found his intense eyes literally devouring me with its burning gaze.

My breathing hitched, when he spoke my name,

_"Bella,"_

_***~Edward~*** _

I woke up rather early, that if you could call the few times I closed my eyes during the night sleep. I have not slept well all night, tossing and turning all the time. I kept thinking of what mother told me, her and father would _disown_ me, had I not married this _Isabella_ girl. I shook my head, rubbing my face rather roughly.

 _Why was this happening to me? If Tanya had not left, things would have been different by now._ Suddenly, I felt _abhorrence_ toward Tanya, if it were not for her; things would have been so much better.

I shook my head again, cursing myself for having such ill thoughts of _Tanya,_ she might have left, but her _love_ would always cage me, I would forever be her enchanted, lover, her _shackled_ slave. It did not matter that I was to marry someone else; my _heart_ belonged only to her, _Tanya._

I sighed heavily, got up, and walked to my window. I pulled open the curtains, letting the sun enclose the shadowy murk of my room. I saw my little sister, Alice, running around our garden, her light pink dress flowing behind her, as she flew from place to another, like a butterfly, flying from flower to another, drinking its nectar.

I felt a smile break across my face, as I watched her. She and mother, were the most precious women in my life, I would do anything for both of them; to make them happy. Namely, Alice.

When mother was conceived with Alice, things have been rather difficult for her. Father had said that another pregnancy for mother would be endangering her life. I overheard them once, speaking of trying to control the birth of other children. I was four years old then, unaware of what they were meaning by it. When mother told me she was with child, and I would get to have a little brother, or sister, I was ecstatic.

Other children would have been angry, or upset, that another child would invade their space in their parent's heart, but I was not. I was happy that I would have a little brother to play with, or a little sister to protect, and dot over her every word and move. Mother was happy that I was happy, and everyday, I would leave everything in my hands, and run to mother, sit beside her, pat her belly gently, and talk to the baby. I remember feeling Alice kick whenever I would be around, and it always made me stare at mother's belly in shock, and then _giggle_ with mirth. Mother would chuckle and smile with me, telling me what a good older brother I would be.

I would do anything for Alice,

_Which sometimes is a blessing and a curse._

I went to the bathroom, took a quick bath, then got dressed, and went out to our garden. It was a sunny day, even though it was winter. The warm rays of the sun were falling over the icy edges, melting them to droplets of watery diamonds. I went to stay around Alice, who smiled widely at me as I approached; only to make a double take when she concentrated on me. Her eyes were wide with shock, and her hands reached her hips, she was standing in a defiant way, glaring at me.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, what in heaven's name are you wearing?" she asked,

I frowned at her, and looked down at my clothes. I was wearing a dark beige pantaloon, and a white silk shirt; the first three buttons were open. I looked good if I may say. I looked up at her to find her glare more intense,

"A shirt and pants?" it came out as a question. Alice huffed, and rolled her eyes.

"You are meeting you _bride-to-be_ for the first time in a few hours, Edward. You must be elegant and handsome," she chided.

"I am always _elegant_ and _handsome,_ " I said, offended. She rolled her eyes again,

"I know, I meant _more_ elegant and handsome. It takes time to be fashionable; even for men," she deadpanned, taking my hand, and dragging me back inside. I sighed, following my sister, up the stairs, and into my bedchamber.

_Sometimes, it's better to do what Alice asks,_

_Or there would be hell to pay._

Alice was like a tornado, searching my clothes for the perfect suit. She was throwing shirts, pants, and coats around my room, until finally, she _squealed_ with delight.

"Perfect," she clapped her hands like a child, and then she gently put my clothes on my bed. She, with the speed of _light,_ returned all my poor, violated clothes back to my wooden closet, and then she gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"You will be the most handsome _groom_ there ever was. She _will_ fall madly in love with you. Now, get dressed," she chirped, leaving me to get dressed.

I sighed, thinking of what she said. I _don't_ want this Isabella girl to _fall in love_ with me, I only want this charade to be over and done. I had my own plan for when we are married, until then; I would be the dream groom.

_Only, for the wrong bride._

Mother has already gone to the Swan residence, ordering me to be there within the following hour. Alice was standing beside me as I saddled my horse, pouting and whining.

"Why can't I go with you?" she asked, jutting out her bottom lip,

"Because mother said so. You will see her eventually," I said, irritably.

"I bet she is pretty. I feel we will be the best of friends," she squealed, jumping up and down, and clapping her hands. I couldn't help but laugh at her. She was such an innocent, loving girl.

 _God help whoever tries to court her into marriage._ I thought.

"I must go now, Alice." I said, hugging her, and kissing her cheek.

"Alright. But you will tell me all about what happened when you return," she said, sternly. I laughed, ruffling her short, spiked hair. She glared at me, before smiling and kissing me cheek.

"God be with you, big brother," she whispered,

"You to, little sister," I smiled, riding my horse, and running through the fields.

I reached Swan residence in record time. I saw mother's personal carriage, standing in front of their house. The driver, Alistair smiled at me as I got off my horse.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Cullen," he greeted,

"How many times must I tell you, call me Edward, Alistair." I rolled my eyes,

"I am on duty, so you are Mr. Cullen now." he grinned. I laughed lightly, and tied my horse to the wooden fence. I took a deep breath, and then ascended the few steps to the front door. I looked back, to find Alistair smiling at me. I smiled back weakly, and then looked at the front door. I took another deep breath, and then rang the doorbell.

There was a slight commotion on the other side, and then the door opened.

_I about dropped to my knees,_

Standing before me, was the most _beautiful_ woman I have ever seen. She was the incarnation of divine beauty. With chocolate, wide bright eyes, dark mahogany curled hair; her alabaster skin was flawless, only tinted with dark pink on her cheeks and lips. She was tiny, her height barely touching my shoulder as we stood, and her physique was of Aphrodite.

_She was divine._

We stared at each other for a few moments, scrutinizing one another. I noticed her cheeks inflame anew as she realized I caught her staring at me. I couldn't help the smirk from forming across my face, as I watched her become that more flustered,

"Miss Swan, I presume?" I asked, my voice husky and seductive,

"Yes," she answered, her voice was slightly rough. She cleared her throat, "Yes, I am," she said, her voice was like the voice of angels,

_Get a hold on yourself, Edward._

We stared at each other again. Somehow, I was unable to look elsewhere. She was so _beautiful._ Her eyes were wide and doe like, staring at my green ones with melted chocolate warmth.

_What the hell is wrong with me? I love Tanya; I should not be secretly admiring another woman's beauty._

_Tanya who?_ My inner moron taunted.

 _Tanya. Tanya. Tanya._ I chanted,

We were rudely interrupted by a shrew voice,

"Isabella, what on earth is taking you so long, girl?" a shrieking, annoying voice shrilled. Isabella sighed heavily, giving me an apologetic look, which in turn I gave a confused one; she looked at me shyly, as she stepped aside.

"Would you like to come in?" she asked, her cheeks flaming anew. She looked adorable.

_Adorable, Edward?_

"Of course, thank you," I smiled crookedly at her, stepping inside. I waited for her to close the door, and when she turned around she almost ran into me. I smiled again, and then ushered her with my hand politely to enter before me. She blushed once more, and then walked into what I presumed was the sitting room.

When I walked in, I saw mother standing beside a blonde _goddess_. She reminded me so much of _Tanya,_ only she was more beautiful; _if that were possible._ She was the blonde to Isabella's brunette. She was breathtaking. Standing in front of her on the other side, was a middle-aged woman, with light brown hair, and black eyes. She was glaring at Isabella, her posture was rigid and her face was flushed with anger.

_Suddenly, I wanted to smack her across the face. How dare she look at Isabella in such way?_

_What? What in god's name am I thinking?_

_Get a hold on yourself, Edward._

"What have you been doing all this time, girl? I hope you haven't done anything to embarrass us in front of _Edward,_ I know how stupid you get all the time," she snarled at Isabella, her words filled with venom, and hatred. In addition, the way she spoke my name, was over-flattering. She must have been Isabella's mother, whom Esme spoke of before. I disliked her at once.

_Without thinking, my mouth spoke,_

"It was my fault, Mrs. Swan. Miss Swan was waiting for me to tie the rope of my horse to the fence, which is why we were late to come inside." I felt a strange sense of over-protectiveness towards Isabella. I wanted this woman to stop patronizing her. I could feel and hear the hard edge that filled my voice as I spoke; my eyes were glaring at her, willing her telepathically to apologize to the sweet girl standing in front of her, _who happens to be her own daughter._

The vile woman was not fretted by my stare, it seemed to be on the contrary; her eyes gleamed with glee as she stared at me. Her smile suddenly appeared as she assessed me, and I felt contaminated and impure by the mere look from her.

Suddenly, she seemed to notice the presence of the blonde beauty, and she glared viciously at her,

"I believe I _asked_ you to go back home, Rosalie, have I not?" the evil winch spat. Rosalie rolled her eyes, glaring back at her, and then she turned to mother, gave her a big hug, and a kiss on both cheeks,

"It was an honor to meet you, Esme; I can't wait to meet Alice as well." She smiled,

"The pleasure was all mine, dear, and you _will_ meet my Ali soon I guarantee," Esme beamed, as she kissed Rosalie on the cheeks. Rosalie turned to Isabella, giving me a nod; her sky-blue eyes were assessing me, only with concentration and questioning. I nodded back, politely. She walked toward Isabella, linking her arm with hers.

"Walk me out, Bella," she said, scowling at the devil's advocate.

_Bella. It seemed to be her pet name,_

_Italian for beautiful;_

Once the beautiful ladies disappeared, the evil shrew turned her flirting eyes at me once more. She even batted her eyelashes at me,

_Now, I was in a terrible need of a bath._

"I will be a minute, darling. Do not go anywhere," she bloody _WINKED._

The moment she left the sitting room, I turned to mother, disgust and repulsion on my face. She sighed, baring the same expressions on her face.

"She's her mother?" I asked, practically spitting out the word _'mother'_.

"Unfortunately, now you know why I have been angry for Bella," she said,

"Isn't her name is Isabella?" I asked, sitting beside mother,

"Yes, but she prefers _Bella._ As a matter of fact, so do I. it suites her, don't you think?"

"Very, _Italian for beautiful_ " I answered without thinking. Esme's smirk was so big; her face would have been carved by it. I rolled my eyes at her, and huffed.

Few minutes later, _Bella_ reentered the sitting room, her face burning with deep red color, and her lips were blood red. _My god, she was exquisite._

"Bella, come sit beside me, dear." Mother smiled at her, sitting aside to give her more room. _Bella_ walked carefully to sit beside Esme, her face heating even more. I was afraid for her health; it was unhealthy to have such amount of blood floating only toward the face. I seemed to be unable to keep my eyes away from her. She was like a magnet, pulling me toward her. She was going to be my wife, so, at least she was _beautiful._ I may not love her, and never would; but that doesn't mean I deny how _breathtaking_ she is,

As I kept staring at her, I felt this sudden electric charge attacking me. It was like touching an electric wire, only it was not lethal, on the contrary; it was _luring._

My inner thoughts were interrupted when the witch reentered the room, huffing and whining like a child,

"The servants are worthless. I should fire them all for their incompetence," she huffed, rolling her eyes. I glared at her, wondering how on earth did Mr. Swan marry such a vicious woman. I felt mother squeeze my knee once, and automatically, I relaxed; only merely. And then I felt Bella's eyes on me, causing me to quickly snap my eyes at her, only to smile when she blushed once more, and then she quickly looked away.

"Esme, don't you believe the children would like to have some privacy?" the devils spawn asked, giving me another flirtatious look. I nearly disgorged my breakfast as I sat, glaring at her, wanting to throttle her for her audacity in speaking in such rudeness to mother.

"Yes, they do," mother snarled, noticing her flirting looks at me,

"Edward, would you be a dear, and take Bella for a walk?" mother asked smiling at me. I nodded, smiling slightly back, and then standing up. I stood in front of _Bella,_ extending my hand for hers to take. My eyes were staring into her warm chocolate ones, finding it nearly _impossible_ to look elsewhere. She blushed, putting her cool, soft, and tiny hand in mine. I engulfed her hand in my large one, and stood her up gently.

"Shall we?" I asked, my voice seductive, without my permission. She blushed some more, and then nodded. _My god, she was adorable,_

"We shall," she answered. We walked toward the front door, and then out to the fresh air. We kept walking for sometime, her looking around her, absorbing the natural scene in front of her, and possibly, avoiding looking at me. I was staring at her, her cheeks were dark pink, and every now and then, she would bite down on her bottom lip. We kept walking some more, until we reached a wooden shack. I sat her gently on a bench, and then I sat beside her. We sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes, until I held her hand in mine, and spoke her name,

"Bella," her name rolled off my tongue, giving me the strangest joyous sensation. She looked at me with her wide brown doe eyes, her cheeks flushing even more. I could not help myself; my hand reached up of its own accord, and gently caressed her burning cheek. If it were possible, she blushed even more profusely,

"You blush at all times," I whispered, my eyes staring into hers. She blinked rapidly, and then looked away,

"It's a trait, I took from my father; or a curse is more like it," she whispered, her voice soft as silk.

"I like it; it's daunting," I murmured, my voice again seductive, in spite of me.

She looked back at me, a small smile gracing her beautiful red lips.

Once more, we fell into a less awkward silence.

My mind was wandering, how would, I make this work. I am certain she is _forced_ to this marriage, just as much as I am, and I believed that in order to _placate_ our families, it would be of best interest for us to cooperate, in order to make it work perfectly. We might not be married out of love, but at the least, we could be civil about our interactions.

 _At least until she becomes with child._ Then, mother would stop pestering me, and I would be the loner, isolated man I once was.

_Or until Tanya returns to me,_

"Bella, I know that we are not in the best situation at the moment. We are both forced into this marriage, and I would like to come to an agreement with you concerning the wedding. Our mothers wants us to marry because they want us to be together, for they have a concept of us to be a wonderful married couple," I said, not mentioning the matter of the money so as to not hurt her feelings, "we could be civil and refined in our relationship with one another. We both know that _we_ will not have any form of feelings for one another, hence, it would be foolish for any of us to have high hopes of something more, wouldn't you agree?" I said, waiting for her answer expectantly. I stared at her as her facial expression morphed. It was at first heated with her beautiful blush, and then a slight frown clouded her face. She appeared to be in thoughts for a few moments, then she looked up at me, her eyes sad, and then she spoke.

"Of course, you are most definitely right. We are _forced_ into this marriage, and there is no need for affection pretences; we will do as we are told, and get it finished," she said, her voice carrying an extremely sad tune.

_Why did it bother me so?_

I shook my head, willing myself to make myself professional about the matter.

"Excellent. It will be better this way, believe me." I concluded,

"Yes, of course." She said, her voice changing tunes. I looked at her strongly, but it only lasted for a split second, as she got up from the wooden bench, I stood up too, looking at her confusedly.

"We should probably go back inside," she whispered, looking everywhere but at me. I frowned, looking at her frail face. I carefully cupped her face in my hands, fearful of breaking her. She looked like a doll, a _beautiful porcelain doll,_ and I took great care in holding her.

"Are you alright?" I whispered, my face unconsciously mere inches away from hers. She nodded, pulling her face away from mine.

"Yes. I am. We should go inside," she said, hurrying with her steps away from me and into the direction of her house. I stood shocked for a few seconds, staring after her.

_Have I done something wrong? Have I said something to offend her?_

I quickly came to my senses, and hurried behind her fearing she would lose her path through the enormous wooden trees. I quickened my step beside her, grasping her hand in mine, only this time it was loose and slackened in my hand. It was as if she did not want me holding her hand.

Once we reached her house, we saw Esme standing at the front porch; a huge smile spread across her face the moment she saw us. I felt Bella's hand clench in my own, and I glanced at her to find her jaw clenching and unclenching.

_What was wrong with her?_

"My dear children, how was your walk?" she asked, pulling Bella into her arms and hugging her tightly. Bella hugged her back; only when I saw her smile; I found it fake, forced.

"It was good," she said, her voice slightly on edge. Mother was about to say something, when Bella's mother walked out of the house, and toward us.

"Edward, my dear, I hope all went well with Isabella," she said, her voice sickly sweet, only it was laced with warning, toward Bella; I presumed.

"All went perfectly, Mrs. Swan," I said as politely as I could muster.

_My god, how I despise that woman,_

"How wonderful. Isabella, it is time for you to come inside the house. The servants cannot do everything on their own, that and the fact that your perfect place is in the kitchen with them," she hissed, glaring at Bella.

I stared at her in shock. Surely, that vile woman was in no way shape is Bella's mother. Bella was a sweet, kind, and lovely girl; whereas her mother was the devil's wife herself.

Bella sighed dejectedly, looking at Esme with a small smile, and hugging her goodbye.

"It was so good seeing you again, Esme." She said, her voice wavering. Mother gave her signature sweet maternal smile, as she hugged her tightly,

"I am looking forward to this union, Bella. Remember, you _are_ my _daughter,_ " she pressed, smiling at Bella before letting her go. I watched as Bella walked back inside the house, aware of the fact that she had not even glanced my way. Mother took my hand in hers, we said a quick goodbye to _the witch,_ and then we went to mother's carriage. Alistair has already taken my horse back home, and I was to ride with mother. I let her in the carriage first, and then I went after her. I sat beside her as Alistair started riding the horses. Mother took a hold of my hand, and squeezed it tightly, a big smile on her face,

"Things will be perfect my darling boy, you just wait," she concluded, as we took our way through the roads.

_I hope I do not regret such a decision._


	6. 05. Wedding Day

_***~Bella~*** _

 

It has been three weeks, since I first laid eyes on Edward. After that first day, he would visit me every day for a few hours. It was what Renee called our _bonding time._ It was a time for us to get to know one another, know what each of us like, what each of us hated, and what each of our characters were like.

If I were being honest with myself, I did like those hours we spent together. Yes, I knew his concept of our marriage, and I knew he was not even encouraging the thought of one day falling in love with each other, but since we were both forced into this marriage, and since father and Emmett were the people in most need of this marriage, I have decided to just agree with what happens. After all, nothing else will happen, and it is inevitable for me to marry Edward.

There was no marriage out of love,

There were no feelings, or loving emotions that are between husband and wife concerning Edward, and me.

And there was no Jasper,

_Oh, Jasper._

The mere thought of him brings literal physical pain into my body. It was agreed upon with father that Jasper would ask for my hand, officially, once he returns from his recruiting in the army.

I _loved_ Jasper, he was my _best friend_ since birth, we were each other's confidant, and I loved him. I knew that he loved me also, and I was waiting for him to return from the army, so that we can get married.

_Nevertheless, Renee had to ruin that for us._

Another reason for her to make a hurried agreement with Esme for me to marry her son. Other than the money, was to pull me away from Jasper. She knew how we felt for one another, and she knew that father gave him his consent to marry me; she also knew how it would hurt me to be away from Jasper therefore, she became the devil's advocate, forcing me to make a choice; either to marry Edward and bring the family more money, or she would take me away from father, Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie and I would never see them again.

_And I knew she was capable of doing so._

_Hence, I had no other choice but to agree to it._

I was pulled out of my reverie when a bell-like voice rang as it called my name. Unconsciously, a smile spread across my face as I heard Alice call out my name, as she nearly flew her way toward me.

_She was another Cullen member I have met._

She was shorter than I was, barely reaching to five feat tall, with a flawless pale skin, and bright wide blue eyes. She had a coal black shiny short hair, which she combed into a strange spiked do. The moment I first saw her when she came to meet me, I quickly thought; _she is a Tinkerbelle._

Alice seemed to be a nice girl, always happy and smiling, and she never frowns or scowls. She even took it upon herself to prepare me for the wedding, alongside Rosalie and Esme. I was thankful that Renee was not going to be a part of it; she only cared about taking the money from Mr. and Mrs. Cullen and spending it extravagantly lavishness, saying how much it would add perfectly to her image around the rich and mighty.

I was pulled out of my reverie with a bouncing Alice, jumping up and down in front of me. I was visiting in the Cullen's house, spending time with Edward and Alice _(and since Edward chose not to spend most of the time with me, he would sit with me for an hour at the most and then leave, invoking his need to work)._ Hence, I find myself sitting in their garden, surrounded by the soft rays of the wintry sun.

"Bella! Bella! Come with me, Mommy and I found you the perfect dress." Alice squealed, grabbing my hand, and dragging me behind her. She literally ran through the garden, and inside their colossal white mansion. We went inside the house, running up the stairs. Our shoes were pounding the wooden stairs, making squeaking noises as we ran. We finally stopped at Esme's chamber, and without knocking, Alice marched herself into the room, dragging me once again behind her.

"Oh, dear. It's perfect. Don't you think, Alice?" Esme asked, grinning from ear to ear. Alice was nodding vigorously, a blinding smile on her face. Esme turned to me, a huge smile on her face, and tears shining in her eyes.

"What do you think, Bella?" she asked, holding a white dress in front of her for me to see. I could not help the gasp that escaped my lips, as I stared at the dress. It was made of white silk, with small transparent diamonds embodied on the bodice. The bodice was a beautiful decent low-cut, and the midriff adorned with pale blue chiffon band. The dress was with long sleeves, and since the wedding was set in a week, and in the winter it was a perfect one. There was a small pale blue necklace attacked to the dress' neck, hanging from a shiny golden band. I was mesmerized with the dress, finding myself caressing it and feeling the silky touch caress my fingers back.

"It's beautiful," I breathed, feeling tears prick my eyes. I was never to be an expert when it came to dresses, especially wedding dresses, but this one captured my heart.

"It was my wedding dress." Esme said. My eyes snapped up to look at hers, watching them fill with tears of joy. I shook my head vehemently, frowning at her.

"I cannot take it, Esme. It is yours, and it should go to Alice on her wedding." I concluded. Esme shook her head with a smile on her face.

"I want you to have it, dear. In addition, have no worries, Alice plans on making her own wedding dress. She says this one is too old fashioned for her day." Esme laughed a symphonic laugh, causing Alice to giggle. I looked at the dress, and back at Esme, and back at the dress again.

"Are you certain, Esme?" I asked, feeling my heart pound with glee. I fell in love with this dress, and I was hoping with all my heart for Esme to be honest in her bestowing.

"Of course, dear. I would have never found a better one for you. It literally was made for you sweetheart." She smiled, pulling me into her arms, and hugging me. I clutched at her body, feeling silent tears falling down my face as I basked in the tenderness of her maternal love. I pulled back, wiping my tears away. Esme gave a watery smile and then took my hand and walked me to the full-length mirror.

"How about you try it on, sweetheart. Let us see if it needs size modifying." She said. Alice bounced toward me, helping me out of my dress and into the wedding dress.

After about an hour, which seemed to be a week, Esme and Alice took the perfect measures of the dress, and they promised, it would be ready before the week was over.

Today was my _wedding_ day. I sat in front of my vanity as Esme, Alice, and Rosalie did their beautifying charm on me. I was already dressed in my white wedding dress, and it was a perfect match. It literally fit me like a glove. Esme and Alice did a wonderful job modifying the dress so that it became fitting for me.

"Edward is going to lose his mind when he sees you, Bella." Alice giggled, kissing my cheek. I gave a small smile, thinking about the ceremony. The day would be spent in dancing, having fun, and acting the ceremonial gathering. I was not too nervous about it, what I was truly nervous about, petrified even, was what happens after the ceremony is over. I was extremely nervous about what will happen once Edward and I are alone in our house, and in our bedchamber. We will have to consummate our marriage, and I was afraid. The only person to ever kiss me was Jasper, and his kisses were chaste, his lips barely brushing mine. Now I am supposed to give myself unconditionally and completely to Edward, a stranger who was, in a matter of minutes is about to be my husband.

_My god, I am so afraid._

"What ever is the matter, dear? You seem strange." Esme asked, her eyes scrutinizing me. I took a deep breath, and gave a small smile.

"I am alright, Esme. I suppose I am nervous." I said truthfully. _I am nervous._

"Oh, sweetheart, it is to be expected. After all, it is the day ever girl waits for with bated breath." She smiled, kissing the top of my head.

"Alright. You are now _officially_ prepared." Rose said, a huge grin plastered across her face. I carefully stood up, looking at myself in the mirror and only just staring. I was still the same, although different in some ways. My hair was piled up in an immaculate bun, with few soft wavy tendrils surrounding my face. My lips were red, and my cheeks were dark pink; and I was redolent with freesia and lavender.

"My god, dear. You are so _beautiful._ " Esme gushed; few stray tears fell from her eyes. Alice was grinning with tears pooling in her eyes, and Rosalie was smiling smugly.

We stood for a few more minutes, staring at my image in the full-length mirror, when a knocking on the door interrupted our staring. Rose went to open the door, and stepped aside to let whoever knocked in. I heard a male gasp, my neck turned to see who it was, and immediately I felt tears pool in my eyes.

"Bells?" father asked, his eyes filling with tears himself.

"Yes, daddy. It is me." I whimpered, running the few steps toward him, and throwing myself in his arms. He held me tightly, caressing my back. I vaguely heard Esme say she will wait for us with the guests. Few seconds later, I heard the door closing as she, Alice, and Rose left. Father pulled back, holding me at arm's length as he inspected me. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears.

"Oh, Bella, you are so beautiful baby." He gushed, his voice thick with suppressed emotions. I felt tears run down my cheeks. He raised his fingers to brush my tears away, leaning forward and kissing my forehead.

"You are the most beautiful bride to ever walk the earth, Bella. I only wish it were in better circumstances." He said. I gave a weak smile, and then kissed his cheek.

"It's alright, daddy. It is for the best." I said, doing my hardest to stay strong and to not breakdown.

"It should have been Jasper, not Edward. Do not go, Bella. I will cancel the wedding and I will not care if I was arrested. You do not deserve this." He was frantic, waiving wildly with his hands. I grabbed both his hands in mine, raising them up to my lips, and kissing them.

"I will do it, daddy. For you and for Emmett." I said with finality. He let out a harsh breath through his nose, and then nodded crushing me to his chest in a bone crushing hug.

"I will never be able to repay you, sweetheart. I can only hope for your forgiveness."

"There is nothing to forgive, daddy. Now, I believe there are guests awaiting our arrival. Let's go, it will all be alright." I smiled, hiding my broken soul behind fake happiness. He sighed, but took my hand and walked us out of the room, and down to the Cullen's ballroom, in which the ceremony was being held.

 _"Do you, Edward Anthony Cullen, take Isabella Marie Swan_ _lawfully wedded wife, to love and to cherish, to have and to hold; and do you promise, forsaking all others, to cleave to her and her alone, until death do you apart?"_ The minister said.

"I do." Edward's velvety voice murmured, causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach.

_"Do you, Isabella Marie Swan, take Edward Anthony Cullen to be your lawfully wedded husband, to love and to cherish, to have and to hold; and do you promise, forsaking all others, to cleave to him and to him alone, until death do you apart?"_

I stared into Edward's eyes, feeling the deep ends of my soul exposed by his penetrating gaze. His eyes were shining in the sun light seeping through the glass windows, casting a shimmer to his already beautiful green orbs.

As I opened my mouth, preparing to say the words _I do,_ suddenly, his emerald green turned into dark ocean blue, his wild disarrayed bronze hair turned into chin length wavy honey blond hair, and his black wedding suit turned into the suit of a major in the southern army. I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself to see Edward's face in front of me and not Jasper's. I took deep breaths, and then opened my eyes to find Edward's green orbs staring at me. I sent a silent prayer to the gods for taking away Jasper's face. I looked at Edward to see him looking somewhat nervous, clutching my hands rather tightly. I looked around to find the people staring at me. Renee was sending me venomous glares, which I would have rolled my eyes at on another time, Alice was looking at me with wide eyes that seemed to give me the look that said _please, say, I do._ Esme and Mr. Cullen were giving the same looks, Rose and Emmett were giving me pitiful and sympathetic looks, and lastly father was telling me with his eyes _not to_ say I do.

I took a deep breath once more, turned my eyes and set them on Edward's face, and smiled.

"I do." I said, literally hearing everyone in the room gasp for air. I gritted my teeth, willing myself not to scream _I am marrying against my will, so leave me be_ at them.

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

_I froze._

In all the hours I spent with Edward, he _never_ kissed me. A small peck on my cheeks or a butterfly kisses to the back of my hand, but he never kissed me _on the lips._

_I was panicking. Only Jasper kissed me on my lips._

Edward pulled me to him, holding me tightly as he leaned down and tilted his head to the right side. His lips brushed across mine, making me feel the electric charge invading my lips. I slowly moved my lips with his, trying my hardest to make the kiss as chaste as possible. He seemed to feel my awkwardness, because he took mercy on me and pulled back after giving me two peck on my lips.

Everyone stood up and clapped; some whistling, some hollering in good humor.

Edward took my hand and we walked to our family. Esme pulled him into her arms, kissing his cheeks and whispering in his ears. Renee merely glanced my side, but the grin on her face was not for me, it was for Edward and the money she would gain from his parents. I could literally see her eyes turn into golden coins as she kept grinning. Rose and Emmett hugged me, telling me it would be alright, Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock gave small smiles as they hugged me, but I could see the hurt and disappointment in their eyes. _They wanted me to be their son's wife._

And lastly, my father. _My daddy._

He pulled me into his arms, squeezing me tightly, and whispering his apologies repeatedly, promising to do his best to make it up to me.

But it was too late.

_I was now Mrs. Isabella Cullen._

The party was at its full highest; everyone was dancing, laughing, and drinking wine and champagne. I have already danced with my father and Emmett; also, Dr. Cullen asked my permission for a dance with his _beautiful daughter-in-law._ I of course, blushed profusely when he called me that. I could not deny that Carlisle, _as he insisted I call him,_ was one of the most handsome men I have ever seen. He was my father's age, around his mid-forties; with neatly combed golden blond hair, the most piercing sky blue eyes, and the most handsome facial features for a somewhat old man. He was very tall, almost as tall as Edward was; and he was the gentlest man I have ever met in my life. He was a true _gentleman._

Our dance turned into two, before I was requested to dance once more with Edward. Ever since, he told me to act nonchalantly about the proposal, and I have been what you may call _depressed._ I had been optimistic in trying to establish a normal, happy marriage, since I was forced into it, I might as well try to benefit from it. Only to be saddened by his words. He was not trying to have a happy married life with me; to him, I was nothing but a mere vessel to give him children; he did not say it to my face, but I heard Renee speak of the matter. Esme wanted a grandchild, and a good wife to her son, and Renee wanted one thing only,

_The money,_

I was dancing with Edward, trying my hardest to forget about the emotional and physical prison, which I would be in, in a matter of hours; I saw Rose sprinting toward me her eyes wide and her skin paler than usual. I stopped dancing with Edward, walking toward her and grasping her shoulders to steady her,

"Rose, what is the matter?" I asked, she kept gasping for breath, attempting to balance her breathing.

"Jasper is here," she said. I stood shocked before her, my eyes wide with surprise and my hands started shaking at the top of her shoulders. I sensed Edward come and stand beside me, he put his hand on the small of my back, and for a moment, his warmth distracted me.

"Is something the matter, Rosalie?" he asked, I sensed concern in his voice, surely for witnessing the expression on her face.

Before either of us could answer, I saw him.

He was walking toward us; his steps deliberate, and his stance straight and filled with militarism and authority. He was dressed in his military attire. Abluish gray wool jacket with yellow edges where the buttons lay. His buttons were as shiny as gold as the light touched them as he walked, I could see the collar of his white shirt tucked inside a bluish gray vest, his pantaloons were also bluish gray, and his shoes was a shiny black. His eyes were pouring into mine, and I felt my heart sink with guilt and grief as I saw the sadness, anger, and despair in them. He did not look as _my Jasper_ any longer; he looked _broken, betrayed, and simply agonized._

He stopped in front of me, his eyes going back and forth looking into mine. I felt a hand tighten on my waist, and I broke the eye contact between Jasper and I to look at Edward's arm, wrapped protectively, albeit possessively around my waist.

I wanted so badly to snatch myself away from Edward and throw my arms around Jasper, but I could not. I looked back at Jasper, drinking in his face, his strong jaw which was defined if not as Edward's was but still strong, his deep ocean blue eyes penetrating mine with so many emotions _anger, sadness, hate_ even. And he was right, I could not blame him if he hated me, for I deserved to be hated for breaking his heart.

I kept staring at him, and was about to speak when his husky, strong voice spoke.

_"Isabella!"_


	7. 6. First Night

**Bella**

 

_Isabella. He called me Isabella._

_He never calls me Isabella, unless he was extremely angry._

_He does look angry, and for the right reasons._ My subconscious hisses.

"Jasper!" I utter his name in a strangled whisper. I deftly clear my throat, attempting to dislodge the cluster forming. I could feel myself starting to breath heavily as he stared at me; his eyes filled with so much despair. I took a deep breath, willing myself to collect my thoughts in my head. I had no idea how I would settle this, but I had to try. However, Jasper preceded me.

"Long time no see, Isabella." He gritted, his jaw clenching tightly I swore I could hear his teeth smacking. I swallowed the lump in my throat, and forced myself to speak.

"How have you been Jasper?" _seriously Bella? That was all you could do?_

Jasper let out a small dark laugh, his eyes turning an even darker blue. "I certainly have been better." He hissed. I was at a loss for words. I knew how much he was hurt, because I felt the same way; however, I had no say in the matter and I could not rescind the wedding, or even the thought of the wedding.

Our bitter engagement was cut off by Edward's voice.

"I'm Edward Cullen, Bella's husband. And you are…?" I saw Jasper flinch at the mentioning of the word _'husband'_ , but he quickly recovered, taking Edward's outstretched hand and shaking it.

"Major Jasper Hale Whitlock." His tone was clipped and forced. Rosalie jumped for an opportunity to disentangle the tense atmosphere.

"He's my twin brother, and Bella's best friend." She said, her tone soft and friendly. However, her words were as if she put salt on fresh bleeding wounds.

_Jasper's wounds…_

"Yes. Only her best friend." He shot a glare to Rose, who gave him a sad look and then looked at Edward, speaking again.

"Can I have a dance with the groom?" she asked. Even though her intentions were in the right place, her words were cutting life a sharp knife as Jasper again flinched at the word _'groom'_.

"I'd be honored. Will you be alright, love?" he asked, his eyes pouring into mine. I cursed myself for drowning in the gleaming brightness of the green of his eyes. However, I was pulled out of my fixation by Jasper's sharp intake of breath. That was when I cursed myself once more.

_He heard Edward calling me love. Damn my wretched soul to the deep pits of hell._

"Yes, Edward. I will be alright. I have not seen Jasper in a long time. You go ahead and dance with Rose." I smiled weakly. He regarded me for a moment, his eyes fixated on mine; then they turned to Jasper to glare a little, and then he reluctantly let go of my arm, and walked away with Rose for their next dance.

As soon as they disappeared from our sight, Jasper grasped my arm and pulled us to the verandah, walking us to the wide patio doors. He opened them, and stepped outside in the garden and to the fresh cool air. We took a few steps until we were away from the party. He stopped under a tree, letting go of my arm, and started pacing back and forth in front of me. I was torn. I wanted to touch him, sooth him, and tell him that everything would be alright; however, I knew it would be a lie. Nothing is alright, and it will never be alright. Seconds passed like hours, with Jasper still pacing, a hand taking a death grip to his hat, and the other running frantically through his honey-blond hair. I could not endure it any longer, so I took a few steps forward, and gently touched his arm.

_His reaction shook me to my core._

"Do not touch me." He spat, eyes blazing a blue fire, and his teeth clenching. He jumped as if he were being burned. As if something electrical stricken him. As if I was danger, and he was my un-suspecting prey.

_It hurt more than I could have ever imagined._

"Jasper please," I begged, feeling tears pricking at my eyes. His glare hardened even more, his mouth turning upward into a sneer.

"Jasper please? Please what, Bella? What do you have to say to defend yourself?" he snarled, his breathing coming in ragged pants, and his chest rising and falling rapidly with the effort of breathing.

"I could not do anything to prevent it, Jasper. It was either I marry him, or father gets scandalized." I whispered, my voice thick with emotion.

"I spoke to Charlie, it was his fault. Why do you always have to pay for the mistakes of others? Does it excite you to play the _martyr_? Have you even thought of us when deciding on this?" he spat, his voice low yet stronger than screaming.

"Of course, I thought about us; about you. But I had no other choice. I could not do this to my father, and my brother. They both need money, if not for Emmett, then for father. All he has left is the ranch, and that too would be lost soon; and I will be damned if I let father have less than he was used to. I am not doing it for Renee, if that is what you are asking. She means nothing to me, merely the woman who gave birth to me; but father and Emmett, they mean the world to me Jasper, and you know that." I sobbed, my vision becoming blurry with the tears that were filling my eyes. I wanted him to understand. I _needed_ him to understand. I loved him, but I had obligations to fulfill.

_It was all for father and Emmett's sake._

He stared at me, his eyes slightly softening. I felt the tears spill down my cheeks as we stared at each other. Suddenly, I was enveloped in his strong arms, his hands cradling my head to his chest, and his chin resting at the top of my head. I clutched at his uniform, sobbing my heart out at him. He kept cradling me, rocking us back and forth as he ran his hands over my back in comfort.

_Oh, how I longed for his comfort._

After feeling myself emptied of my tears, I pulled back and looked up at him. His eyes were a smoldering blue, shining in the dim light. He stared at me with an intensity that nearly brought me to my knees. Cradling my head gently in his hands, he spoke.

"Run away with me," he whispered, eyes pouring into mine. I stared at him with wide eyes and gapped mouth. _Did I hear him correctly? Did he say what I think he said?_

"Wh—what?" I squeaked, my eyes wide as a dear. He gave me a smoldering smile.

"Run away with me, Bella. We could go to Texas, or even leave the country. I do not care; I only want you to be with me. Please Bella." His whispered plea cut through my sordid soul like shards of glass. _He wanted us to run away?_

"Jasper, we could not. I am already married to Edward. In addition, I cannot scandalize my father's name in such a way. And what about your deployment? The army has always been your dream. You cannot abandon it so easily." I said, trying my hardest to remove the ridiculous thought from his head. He leaned closer until our noses were an inch apart.

"I do not care. I only want you Bella. I want to marry you and have children with you. I want us to have a perfect happy family life together. I always have. Just come with me."

I closed my eyes, trying to absorb his words. He cannot be serious. I took a deep breath, and as I opened my eyes to look at him and attempt to put some sense in his mind; his lips crashed into mine. I stood frozen as he kissed me.

_My goodness. Jasper was kissing me. And not a tender kiss either._

It was a fiery kiss. A kiss that leaves you breathless and wanton for more. I found myself responding to the aggressiveness of his kiss, mine lips molding with his. He took a hold of the back of my head, pushing my face into his. I kissed him back with vigor, taking out all my anger, sadness, hatred, and bitterness into the kiss. Jasper responded simultaneously, his fingers grabbing my head and his chest aligned with mine. I could feel the rising and falling of his muscular chest as he panted into my mouth. As his hands descended toward my shoulders and then my upper chest, I panicked. Detaching myself away from him, I stared at him with wide eyes, my breathing coming out in hurried gasps. His eyes were shining with happiness, his hair a deshelved mess, and his grin was so wide that I feared it would split his face in half.

"Jasper, what have you done? Are you mad?" I whisper-yelled. His smiled slowly faded as he frowned. "I wanted to show you how much you wanted me." He whispered, his eyes penetrating my very soul.

"I do not need a proof of my wanting you, Jasper. I am married now; I have said my vows to Edward and him I. We cannot be together, Jasper. Please stop what you are doing."

He stared at me, unblinking. "You kissed me back." He said, his voice firm.

_Now I have to say the words I knew would hurt us both._

"It was a mistake. I was not thinking clearly. It should have never happened." I whispered. Suddenly, his face darkened and his emotions vanished. His expression turned blank and the glimmer in his eyes gloomed. He ran his fingers through his hair, taming the messy mop; and then bends to retrieve his hat, which apparently fell to the ground when we were engaged in our passionate embrace. He straightens himself, puts the hat on his head, and then looks at me. I flinched at the harsh and cold look he was giving me. His eyes turned into cold stone, almost freezing me in my place. He took a few steps away from me, turned around and faced the ground to ceiling windows.

"Yes. I believe you are right. It was a mistake. I was not supposed to kiss you in such a way. It was my fault." He stopped talking, taking a deep breath and then turned around to face me. His posture was not of _my Jasper_ , it was the posture of _Major Jasper Whitlock_.

"This _will_ be the last time you ever see my face again, Isabella." He concluded, his voice grave. Sparing me a final glance, he turned around and _left_.

_He left. Jasper left._

I stood frozen in my place as I stared where he disappeared. I clutched at my chest as I felt it tighten; strangled sobs tried breaking their way out of my throat as I finally understood.

_This is the end for Jasper and me. I will never see him again._

I sled down the tree we stood in front, my eyes burning and my cheeks itching from the stream of tears falling down my face. I knew Jasper was telling the truth. I would _never_ see him again, and it tore at my heart as I realized it.

Mites passed like hours with me crouching in agony. I felt a strong hand squeezing my shoulder lightly. I knew that hand. I looked up to see Emmett staring at me with sad eyes.

In an instant, I was in his arms; he enveloped in his strong brotherly embrace, rocking me back and forth and soothing me as I bawled. I was vaguely aware of Rose's presence beside him as she gently rubbed my back. After a few more minutes, my waterfall of tears dried. I pulled away from Emmett, and wiped my face, erasing any trace of wetness.

"Bella-" Emmett started, but I cut him off with a shake of my head.

"No, Emmett, you do not have to say a word. It is over." I concluded, giving a heavy sigh.

"Bella," Rose whispered. I turned to look at her to see tears swimming in her eyes. I gave her a weak smile, "I only hope Jasper finds the right one for him, for I am not."

_And then, I went inside to the party._

…

_ Edward _

_Beautiful._ That was the first word I thought of when I saw her. I heard before that every bride is beautiful on her wedding day; however, I was not prepared for the divine scene in front of me. She captivated me with ever move, ever gesture, every word; and I felt my heart pounding in my chest every time I was close to her, touching her, and simply feeling her.

I felt a strange sense of smugness when I heard her say _'I do'_ , and I realized that the reason behind it was the unmistakable reality that she was _mine._ She belonged to me, and I belonged to her.

_I felt the most bizarre sense of… happiness._

I was dancing with my angel, drinking in her immense beauty, when her friend Rosalie came to us running; her normally pale face was white as a sheet, her eyes were wide and frantic, and her breathing was labored. Bella detached herself from me and scurried to her friend, trying to understand the reasoning behind Rosalie's discomfort. Rosalie started speaking, and I saw Bella's face turn from a blooming pink to a color paler than Rosalie's.

 _I felt a tugging to my chest, which I failed to explain;_ however, I brushed it off and went to both ladies. "Is something the matter, Rosalie?" I asked, unable to hide the concern from my voice. Rosalie looked at me with wide eyes, and if I were not mistaken, I sense a slight _panic_ in them. I looked at Bella hoping she would be able to speak about what ever took place, when I saw her frozen in her spot and her eyes were trained straight ahead. I looked to where she was looking and I felt tightening in my chest. She was staring at a man, a blond man in a military uniform. I could see his eyes trained on her, almost devouring her with his glares. I instinctively felt protective and a bit possessive of her. He took long and straight strides until he reached us. I saw his eyes were a dark blue, stormed with intensity as he stared at _my_ Bella. I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist and I saw the man spare the gesture a glance from the corner of his eye, and I watched as his jaw clenched, before turning his gaze back to Bella.

"Isabella!" he said, his voice strong but I detected a strangled edge to it. Bella stared at him with wide eyes, her expression of shock, pain, and guilt. _Why would she feel such emotions, on her wedding night no less?_

"Jasper," she said his name, her voice strangled and hoarse. I was acting calmly on the outside, but from within myself I was fuming. Who was this man that made _my_ Bella act in such a way? It was as if he held her whole world, although the way he stared at her was of intense anger and anguish combined. Why would he look at her in such a way, and why would she act as if she were about to cry?

_That was when I realized…_

He looks to feel the same way I felt when _Tanya_ left me. I was just as broken. Is it possible that this man was to Bella what I was to Tanya? Was she to him as Tanya was to me?

I felt anger rising more and more inside of me as I thought of it. It was not possible for Bella to have the same connection I had with Tanya with this man. She could not have done the things I have done with Bella.

_She could not._

Jealousy was eating at my insides as I considered the option. It has been years since I felt it, and it was attacking me like no other time.

_Bella was mine, and mine alone. I would be her first, and her last._

I was startled by the severity of my emotions. I have never felt such deep emotions toward a woman, not even Tanya; which shook me to my core. I was betraying Tanya by the mere thought of having feelings for the woman beside me. Our marriage was of obligation on her part, and a means on mine. She needed my wealth to save her family, and I needed her to secure the mind of my mother, and grant her an father the heir they have always wanted.

_There are no feelings between Bella and me, nor there ever will be._

_Is that what you say to convince yourself?_ The voice inside my head snipes.

I was pulled out of my thoughts with the voice of the man, Jasper. "Long time no see, Isabella." He said between gritted teeth. His eyes were staring at her, glaring even. His jaw was clenched so hard, that I heard his teeth grinding.

"How have you been, Jasper?" Bella asked, her voice shaky and timid. Jasper let out a dark laugh as his eyes shifted color to even a darker blue; almost midnight. "I certainly have been better," he hissed at her. I felt my possessive and animalistic nature take over. How dare he speak to my wife in such a way? I will not tolerate it.

"I'm Edward Cullen, Bella's husband. And you are…?" I asked, taking satisfaction in watching him flinch when I mentioned the word _'husband'_. _Yes, she is MINE._

"Major Jasper Hale Whitlock." He shook my outstretched hand, his voice was clipped and cold as he spoke. We seized one another, my firm tightening as he tightened his. None of us was winning the battle. Each grip of ours was equally strong.

"He is my twin brother, and Bella's best friend." Rosalie spoke in a gentle and a friendly voice. _Best friend? I thought Rosalie was her best friend._

"Yes, only her best friend." Jasper gritted, shooting a glare at Rosalie, who gave him a sad smile. _Yes, this man was without a doubt, in love with my wife._

"Can I have a dance with the groom?" Rosalie asked, trying to defuse the tense atmosphere. Again, I basked in the joy of watching Jasper flinch when the word _'groom'_ was spoken. I agreed to Rosalie's offer, thinking it would be best option to have information from her on her brother.

"I'd be honored. Will you be alright, love?" I turned to Bella, launching the magical influence of the gaze of my eyes. I came to know that women were weak in front of the looks and glances I gave them with my emerald greens. I saw Bella's eyes widen and her breathing hitched as she stared into mine. I felt the side of my upper lip twitch fighting a smile as I heard Jasper's sharp intake of breath as I said the word _'love'_.

"Yes, Edward. I will be alright. I have not seen Jasper in a long time. You go ahead and dance with Rose." She gave me a weak smile. I regarded me for a moment, my eyes fixated on hers. A few seconds passed, then I turned to Jasper with a glare. I reluctantly released her, taking Rosalie's hand and leading her to the dance floor.

After a few dance moves with Rosalie, I decided to ask her about her brother.

"So, how long had Jasper been Bella's friend?" I asked, forcing my voice to sound nonchalant. Rosalie gave me a slightly suspicious look, before she spoke.

"Jasper and _I_ have been Bella's friends ever since we were little. We used to play in the background and the gardens of our houses, and we were together at all times." She pressed on the matter of her being in the picture with them. I nodded, moving her around the dance floor. Our talk afterward of no consequence. We danced for a few more minutes, when I felt Rosalie's body tense, and her eyes fell with worry. I was about to ask her what happened when I saw Jasper stand beside us. He did not spare me any glances as he looked at his sister.

"I'm leaving, Rose." He said, "I'm supposed to be deployed soon, and I need time to rest." He then turned to me, his eyes hard and fiery. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Cullen; however I must leave at once. I only hope that Isabella be happy with you." His words were conveying his concern for Bella.

"She is in good hands with me; I promise to take good care of her." I do not know why I felt the urge to assure him that I would look after her, but I did, and I gave him my word for it.

 _Even thought you were planning to throw yourself in Tanya's arms, if she took you back again?_ The irritating voice inside my head hissed, however, I ignored it. Jasper nodded at me, gave Rosalie a kiss on the cheek, hugged her and then left.

"I am going to look for Emmett," Rosalie said, giving me a slight smile. I nodded, letting her pass beside me. I went my own way to search for Bella, but I was interrupted with guests congratulating me and wishing me a happy marriage. As I was speaking with a friend of mine, I saw Bella emerge from the patio doors. I excused myself and walked toward her. She was flanked by Emmett and Rosalie. As I approached her, I noticed that her eyes were red and slightly swollen, as if she were crying. I hurried toward her, grabbing a hold of her hand as I reached her and looked into her eyes.

"Are you all right?" I asked, shooting a glare toward Emmett. He must have upset her.

"Yes, I am all right." She said in a small voice. "You do not seem alright. What have you done to upset her, Emmett?" I snarled, my blood boiling with anger.

"I have done nothing, Edward. She is all right. Come on, Rosie, let's dance." He took Rosalie's hand and walked toward the dance floor. I took Bella's face in both of my hands, and stared into her eyes.

"Please, tell me what's upsetting you, love." I asked in a hushed voice. Her eyes started filling up with tears as she stared at me. She closed her eyes, causing a few drops to fall to her rosy cheeks, and without thinking of it, I leaned forward and brushed the tears with my lips. _I hated the thought of watching her cry._ As I pulled back, I saw her staring at me with a strange expression. It was of adoration, awe, and something else I could not place.

"Bella?" I asked, willing with my eyes to speak.

"I am alright, Edward. I supposed I would miss Jasper that's all. He is to leave for his deployment soon. He is like a brother to me," she said, her voice chocking.

Something inside of me told me that she was not telling the whole truth, but I suppressed it. I took her hands in mine, and kissed her knuckles.

"It's alright, love. Come, there are hundreds of guests who would like to congratulate the bride." I gave her a smile and she took a deep breath, smiling slightly in return.

_This is our wedding night, and I will be damned if I let her think of any other but me._

… **..**

After the gathering ended, father gave me the key to the country house; telling me to spend our honeymoon in it. I was planning on going straight to mine and Bella's new house, but mother insisted that we spend our honeymoon in the country house. Bella and I bid our goodbyes to our families, and when I was hugging Alice, I noticed that she was somewhat distracted. I asked her what was the matter, but she brushed me off, telling me to think only of my bride.

When Bella and I reached the house, I took her straight to the bedroom. I was glad to see her more relaxed and smiling after Jasper was gone. I was determined to have her think of only me tonight, and every night of our honeymoon.

Once we reached my room, I bend at the knees and carried Bella; she let out a yelp, startled by my move. I gave her a smirk to which she giggled. I opened the door, and went inside. I heard Bella gasp as she took in the room. It was dark, only dimly lit with the fiery light of candles. Red roses were strewn about the floor and the bed, a bottle of wine sitting on a tray filled with fruit on the bedside table. I let her down to her feet, watching her face as she took in the room. I was impressed myself with the way the room was organized to create a loving yet erotic atmosphere. It was surely my mothers' doing.

"What do you think?" I whispered in Bella's ear as I stood behind her. I felt her shiver at the sound of my voice, making me grin.

"It's lovely. It took my breath away." She whispered back, her body leaning against mine. I turned her around until she was facing me. I stared into her beautiful eyes and then leaned down and kissed her lips. Our lips molded together; at first, she was hesitant, but then she started to relax and kissed me back. I deepened the kiss, running my hands over her arms. She shivered as her hands tentatively ran over my chest. After a few more minutes of kissing, I pulled back panting heavily. I watched as she bit her lip, her cheeks were a deep red; her breathing was as heavy as mine was, and her lips were swollen.

"Why don't you enter the bathroom and change? I will be waiting for you." I whispered against her lips. She nodded, her breath fanning over my face. She pulled back, walking to the bathroom that was in my room, and closed the door behind her. I exhaled a deep breath, quickly shedding my clothes. I put on my dark blue gown, feeling the soft touch of the silk caressing my nude body. I went to the window, pulling open the curtains, and watched as the full moon light illuminated the room. I sat on the edge of the bed, feeling a bit nervous myself. It has been two years since I had been with a woman, and I was a little nervous. My nervousness turned into lust and carnal appetite as I watched Bella enter the bedroom, wearing a white silk gown. I felt my body shiver in want as I watched her sway in the flimsy piece of clothing, her moves salacious and erotic.

_My god, I was dying._

I slowly got of the bed, walking until I reached her. Her eyes were wide and innocent, yet her body was sensual and lustful. I took her hand and walked us the king-size bed. I urged her to move until her back rested on the headboard. I grabbed the tray, putting it in between us. I took a strawberry and put it on her lips. She slowly opened her mouth and took a bite. I heard myself groan at the sight; she blushed looking down. I touched her chin with my fingers and lifted her head up. I leaned forward and kissed her gently.

"Don't shy away from me Bella. I am your husband, and you should not be shy from me." I said trying to encourage her, even though her shyness was extremely appealing to me. She nodded, and I resumed feeding her the strawberry. After a few ones, she looked at me with a questioning in her eyes.

"What is it, love?" I asked, running my fingers over her heating cheeks.

"C- Can I feed you, too?" she asked, her face turning an unhealthy shade of red I feared she would combust. I smiled, nodding and gesturing for her to do it. She tentatively too a strawberry, moving it to my lips. I opened my mouth and took a big bite, nearly biting her fingers. She giggled and I smirked as I chewed. She fed me a few more times, until I was full. I grabbed the bottle of wine, and poured us two glasses. I clinked my glass with her, and then drank. I watched as her throat move as she swallowed, the movement sent chills down my spine. Her eyes were locked on mine as she swallowed the last drop, breaking my resolve. I took the crystal glass from her hand, tossing it on the tray alongside my own glass. I put the tray on the bedside table and then leaned back, staring into Bella's eyes. I got up on my knees, slowly leaning down toward her. I touched her cheek with my right hand, groaning as my forearm came in contact with her left breast. I could feel that she was naked underneath her gown and it made me feel more lustful toward her. I watched her as her breathing sped up, her shallow panting unbelievably erotic. Without warning, I crashed my lips to hers, literally devouring her mouth. I have never had such intense desire before, and I basked in the ecstasy. I heard her moan, causing my member to harden, more so than it already was.

_I could not take it any longer._

My hand started to play with the silky strap of her gown, slowly untying it. I felt her breathing hitch as my hand slowly caressed the exposed skin of her stomach. My hand started ascending slowly, as my lips kept molding with hers. Her arms wrapped around my shoulders, her fingers linking behind my neck and holding closer to her. I started to slowly remove her gown, hearing her breathing hitch, more so than it already was. The silky gown slipped from her shoulders, giving me more access to her body. I felt her shiver as the nightly chill enveloped her. I pulled back, staring at her face with a smirk. My eyes drank her in, as it descended toward her body. I felt my member harden even more as I; for the first time saw her; naked as the day she was born. Her breasts were small but perky, her skin pale as the moonlight, and slightly covered with a thin sheen of pink. I saw her nipples harden as the cool air of the night touched her. My groan was so loud, that it rattled around the room. I saw her pull her arms, and cross them in front of her torso; her eyes wide and her cheeks pink with embarrassment. I gently pulled her arms away and to her sides, running my fingers up and down the skin of her clavicles.

"Do not hide from me, Bella. You are beautiful, and you are my wife. There is no shame in what we are doing." I whispered, leaning forward and kissing her shoulder blades.

"Let me love you, Bella." I whispered again, my lips kissing all around her upper torso. I felt her relax under my touch, her skin heating beneath my lips. I pulled back, removing my gown and throwing it to the floor. I heard Bella gasp and I looked at her to see her eyes staring at my nether regions. I smirked at her expression. I was not an overly proud man, but I held my own; and I was positive I would be able to pleasure Bella at all times.

"What is it, love?" I asked, toying with her a bit. She bit her lip, eyes going wider.

"You, I mean, your—you are big." She squeaked, slapping her hand over her mouth. I chuckled at her, leaning forward and kissing her nose.

"Why, thank you love. I can assure you my performance will be just as massive." I smirked, watching as her eyes widened further. I kissed her cheek, moving my lips to her ear, and sucking the lobe in my mouth.

"Lie down for me, love." I purred, running my fingers over her ribs. She moaned, slowly slipping herself until she was laying on her back. I pulled back, sitting on my knees and watching as she lay there, exposed for me.

_My god, she will be the death of me._

I started kissing her face. Forehead, brows, cheeks, nose, and finally lips. Her mouth opening to mine as I gently pushed my tongue inside her mouth. My hands were caressing her torso, slowly descending toward her breasts. She let out a strangled moan as my hands cupped her mounds. My thumbs circling her rosy buds. I pulled back, staring at her as she writhed beneath me; eyes closed, cheeks and upper torso flushed.

"Just feel, Bella. Just feel." I encouraged, leaning down and replacing my hand with my mouth. She gasped loudly, her right hand touching my head and tugging at my hair as my mouth devoured her left breast. My left hand was caressing her left breast still. She literally tasted of vanilla and cherry, and my mouth watered, as I tasted her.

"Edward," my name fell from her lips in a silent whisper, her fingers tugging roughly on my hair. I let her out of my mouth, chuckling lowly as she whimpered in protest, and then went to taste her other breast. We repeated the same moves; me tasting her, and she tugging at my hair. After a few licks, I pulled away from her breasts, kissing down in between them and around to her rips. My kisses descended her body, my lips, tongue and teeth tasting her, licking her, and nibbling at her flesh.

_She was the most delicious of all fruits._

Finally, when my mouth got closer to her nether heaven, she froze. Her hand tugged violently at my hair as she tried pulling me up. I looked up to see her shaking her head and her eyes were brimming with tears.

"What is it, love?" I asked, alarmed.

"What—I mean I do not. What are you doing, Edward?" she asked, her voice slightly panicked. I understood her worried expression and smiled softly at her.

"I am going to taste and worship you. It is not disgusting or unpleasant. It can bring you immense pleasure. If you would only let me please you. If you do not like it, you can tell me and I will stop at once." I reasoned, kissing her hipbone. She looked at me with a perplexed expression. I kissed her other hipbone and gave her my enchanting smile.

"You are beautiful Bella. Everything about you is beautiful. Let me please you." I whispered huskily. I was barely able to control my carnal desire for her. She nodded slowly, taking a deep breath and relaxing her body. I gave her a wicked smile as my lips went further down. I looked at her heaven and groaned, watching as her soft folds glistened with her nectar. I leaned forward and blew air into her. She groaned, fisting her hands in my hair. I wasted no time, leaning more and giving her a slow sensual lick. Her hips bucked up, and her body convulsed. I took it as a good sign and started my thorough work. I started licking and sucking her small bundle of nerve, taking her pink clitoris into my mouth and lightly sucking it. She moaned loudly, her body shaking as if she were having a seizure. I slowly ran my index finger over her wet slit, causing her to moan louder. I smirked smugly as I slowly but surely thrust my finger inside of her.

"My god," she cried, her hands leaving my hair and fisting the sheets. I gloated in my accomplishment, keeping my lips on her pink flesh, and my finger inside her. She was soaking by the second, her flesh twitching from my touch. I decided to take a bolder step.

I removed my finger, and replaced it with my tongue. She screamed as I entered her with my tongue, thrusting in and out of her garden. She started to move violently as I lapped at her sweet nectar.

_Finally, she collapsed._

"EDWAED!" she screamed, bucking her hips wildly as I drank her sweet nectar. She was sweeter than the finest of wines, and she was all mine.

After her body slackened, I moved up to her and kissed her. She was hesitant for a moment, but she responded quickly. Our lips molded together.

"How do you feel, love?" I asked, running my nose along her neck. She sighed contently.

"I feel like a jelly fish." She whispered. I laughed, kissing her neck.

"Just wait and see what comes next, my dear." I winked, causing her to blush. I looked deeply into her eyes, my gaze serious.

"However, this time will hurt a little; seeing as it will be your first time to make love. I will make it as gentle as possible for you." I whispered, gazing into her warm eyes.

"Do you trust me?" I asked, feeling myself wanting her to say that she does and mean it.

_I wanted her to trust me._

"Yes," she whispered. I smiled, hovering over her. My member was agonizingly hard, and it was terribly painful. I leaned forward, kissing her gently as I lined myself with her entrance.

"Trust me." I whispered as I slowly entered her. She tensed, her arms wrapping around my shoulders. I stopped for a moment, willing myself not to climax on the spot. She was so warm, so wet and tight. She was magnificent.

Gently, I kept pushing inside, until I reached her barrier. I looked into her eyes and crashed my lips to hers, as I roughly went all the way inside. She froze, crying out in pain. I stilled, kissing her gently and then pulling back. I whispered words of love and kindness in her ears until she started to unloose her body. Minutes later, she instinctively started to move her hips. I took it as my sign and moved with her. We established a perfect rhythm, my hips pulling and hers pushing. Our bodies were sleek with sweat, and our breathing was heavy and irregular. I could feel her as she started to tighten around me.

_She was close. And so was I._

I let my hand go down to her pubic bone, my fingers caressing her hungry flesh as I slammed into her. My hips pumping at a wild pace.

"Cum for me love. Let go." I groaned, taking her nipple into my mouth.

_That was her undoing._

"I—I –Edward, EDWARD!" she screamed, her nails digging into the flesh of my shoulders. A few more thrusts and I was emptying myself inside of her.

 _Pure, unadulterated bliss._ That was how I felt.

After a few minutes, I slowly pulled back, cursing myself as she hissed in slight discomfort. I laid on my back, pulling her onto me. Her head rested on my chest, and her arm circled my waist. I hared her yawn and I chuckled.

"Sleep, love. Sleep and rest." I kissed the top of her head, succumbing myself sleep.


	8. 7. A Month Of Heaven

_**Bella** _

 

I could feel strong arms wrapped around me, warm breath fanning through my hair, and a strong body pressed against my back. I slowly turned in the arms of my husband not wanting to wake him up, and stared at his sleeping face. So much had happened last night. The wedding festivity, Edward and my marriage bonding ritual, Jasper's appearance, and lastly mine and Edward's love making.

I closed my eyes and sighed deeply, remembering the later incident. I remembered how scared and worried I have been when we entered our bedroom, staring in awe as I watched the dimly illuminated room shine with candlelights, and the moonlight. My heart was pounding furiously in my chest as I felt Edward get closer and closer to me, feeling his breath touching the back of my neck and caressing my skin set my body on fire.

When I went to the bathroom to change, as I took off my wedding dress and started putting on the night robe Alice none too subtly put on the wall hanger; Jasper's face jumped to the forefront of my mind. His midnight blue eyes were burning with such intensity, that I felt my stomach churn with pain and guilt.

_He promised to never show his face again, and I believed him._

_Because he was a man of his word._

I remembered going back to the room, watching as Edward sat on the edge of the bed. He was already dressed in a robe like me, and I could see from the naked body of his chest, peeking out of the slightly opened robe that he was nude underneath.

I could feel the way my body flamed as he sat me on the bed, feeding me the delicious strawberries and slightly touching me. I felt I was on the brink of dying when I asked if I could feed him. And I nearly whimpered when he groaned as I fed him. I was feeling very strange and unfamiliar feelings as we sat together, feeding each other delicious fruit, and drinking wine. I was taken aback, when he snatched the glass from my hand and threw it on the tray, dumping it on the bedside table. Watching as he leaned down and started caressing my face with his fingers, and kissing my skin. I remembered the way I gasped, feeling his forearm touching my flimsily covered breast. I was so very nervous, that I felt my face set aflame.

I closed my eyes, remembering, as I was suddenly naked in front of him; his eyes roaming all over my exposed flesh. I felt such a thrill when he asked me not to shy away from him. I could feel butterflies fluttering in my stomach as he kept touching my naked form and kissing all over my skin.

Then, he took off his robe.

_I almost fainted._

I watched as his member stood erect, glistening with his arousal. A strange sense of pride enveloped me as the though of me causing him this level of carnal appetite. I felt my body shiver as I remembered the way his fingers, mouth, and whole body played mine like a pianoforte. He was a masterful musician, and I was his miraculous piece of composition.

However, after feeling all the blissful and euphoric sensation of orgasm, and as we lay afterward preparing for sleep; I felt tears fall down my cheeks as my mind though of Jasper. I felt as if I was betraying him with the way I easily gave myself to Edward, but the realistic side of my mind told me that what I did was for the best.

 _It was better to sooner accept your fate, rather than experience unhappiness from the very first night._ The realistic part assured me.

I sighed, opening my eyes to find a pair of intense emerald greens staring at me with an expression I could not fathom.

"Good Morning, love." Edward whispered, his right arm tightening around me and his left lifted up so that his fingers could brush my cheeks.

"Morning," I mumbled, feeling my cheeks heat with fire. He gave a smile, caressing my cheek.

"God Bella, I love the way you blush." He practically purred. I swallowed, giving a small smile and wiggling about in his arms.

"Where are you going?" he asked, as I moved to get off the bed.

"I need to go to the bathroom," I said, getting up. I hissed as I felt slight pain in between my legs. Edward moved beside me quickly and rubbed my back.

"I am terribly sorry for have hurting you; the first time can be quite painful for the woman." He whispered, drawing circles on my back. I took a deep breath and moved my body slowly, wanting to leave as quickly as possible to the bathroom. Edward smiled at me as I got up. Wrapping the white sheet around my naked body and walked quickly to the bathroom.

After washing up, and nearly fainting at the sight of the slight blood attached to my skin, I took a deep breath and walked back to the room. Edward was lying with his eyes open, staring up at the ceiling. He smiled as he saw me walking back to the bed. As I approached my side of the bed, I noticed a small red patch on the white sheet. I blushed as Edward's eyes caught sight of it. He gave a smile and then got off the bed. I blushed even more as I watched him walk toward the bathroom naked; he did not grab a sheet to wrap it around himself. I was staring at his naked back, watching as his muscles clenched with every move he made.

He turned around and I found myself staring at his endowed member.

"See something you like, Mrs. Cullen?" he asked. I looked up to see a smirk across his face. I blushed deeply and bowed my head, sitting myself on the bed. I heard him chuckle and then the door to the bathroom closed.

_My god, what have I gotten myself into with this man?_

Quickly, I removed the sheet, having in mind to dispose of it later, and then got dressed in a thick sleeping gown. I put new sheets on the bed and organized the room a bit. I hated having things to be unorganized. I heard the door to the bathroom reopen once more, and I looked to see Edward walking out, again naked. I looked out of the window, feeling both embarrassed and awkward.

_The uncomfortable moment passed last night, why am I still reeling?_

_Because of Jasper._ A faint voice in my mind whispered.

I took a shuddering breath, finding myself thinking about him. How was he now? What was he doing? Had he gone back to the drill, yet? Did he travel somewhere far? And the most important question of them all,

_Will he ever forgive me?_

I felt two arms encircling me from behind.

"What are you thinking about, love?" I shivered, as his warm breath tickled my neck. I took a deep breath and shrugged.

"Nothing, just staring at the trees," I said, looking out of the large window.

"I suppose there are certain things to think about in such time, don't you think?" he asked, his lips trailing wild fire down my neck and to my shoulders. I shivered, sighing heavily.

Could I ever love Edward? He was nice and gentle to me, his caresses and gestures romantic and wooing; but his words that we would never have a romantic relationship and that the marriage was merely to placate our mothers and to produce a Cullen heir took residence in my mind.

_Will I ever have what Emmett and Rose has?_

As Edward started removing the top of my gown, we heard horses and a carriage approach. I believe I heard Edward growl as he got up from behind me and went to the window. Again, I blushed, watching, as he stood naked in front of the window.

_Apparently, he is not in favor of decency._

"Hell," he yelped, jumping away from the window and running toward the wardrobe. I looked at him quizzically, pursing my lips as to not laugh as I saw him jumping while attempting to dress in his pants. His eyes locked on mine and he scowled.

"What is it that has you grinning about?" he hissed, I giggled not noticing I had been grinning.

"Why are you in such a hurry to dress?" I asked, biting my lip as he fell to the floor. He balanced himself and got up, dressing rightfully in his pants.

"Mother is on her way here, and I would very much appreciate it if she does not see my exposed bodily parts." He growled.

_I could not handle more,_

I burst out laughing, clutching at my stomach as I giggled loudly and violently. He was adorable looking flushed and scared to be caught naked by his mother.

_It was a scene to behold._

His scowl deepened as he snatched a white silky dress shirt and hastily put it on.

"I suggest you dress in something decent as well, for I am certain mother would love to see you, also." He gritted. I nodded, getting up and walking around him to the wardrobe, but not before, he caught me around the waist and pulled me tightly to his chest. He stared at my eyes for a moment, and then crashed his lips to mine. That kiss was not gentle or sweet like the ones he gave me last night, it was passionate, violent, and dazzling as his lips molded with mine and his tongue played with my own.

After what felt like and ear, he pulled back, panting and flushed. I was not in a better condition than he was, my breathing was fast and my body was on fire.

"Get dressed," he ordered gently and then kissed me lightly on the forehead, and then he went out of the room.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

_**Edward** _

I quickly jumped down the stairs, secretly cursing the visit of my mother. Do not get me wrong, I love mother; but her timing was _ridiculous_ for a visit. Couldn't she wait a few days, or until the honeymoon was over?

I took the last few steps in a high jump and was in front of the door in a second. I opened it, walking outside to the fresh air and wend down the front steps. Alistair, who smiled at me as he stopped, was driving the carriage.

"Good morning, Alistair," I smiled.

"Good morning Mr. Cullen." He smiled back. I went to the carriage door and opened it, taking first mother then Alice's hand and helping them out of the carriage.

"Morning dear," mother cooed, kissing my cheek.

"Morning mother," I kissed her back, "Alice," I hugged my sister, carrying her and twirling her in a circle. She squealed and giggled, kissing my cheek as I let her down. I was about to ask how she has been when she squealed and ran around me.

"BELLA! BELLA!" she screamed, running toward my wife and hugging her. Bella laughed, as she was pushed a few steps back from the force of my sister's hug.

"She is a beauty, is she not?" mother asked, her voice gentle and motherly.

"Yes, she most certainly is." I concluded, watching as the light sunrays kissed my wife's face and hair making her pale skin more illuminating, and her dark thick hair shinier than diamonds.

"How are you dear?" mother asked, as she put her arm in the crook of my mine and walked us slowly toward my wife and sister.

"I am all right, mother." I said. She gave me a strange look and then sighed.

"Alright, I will simply ask it; how did you do last night?" she asked.

_What? Certainly, she was not asking about…_

"W – What?" I asked, attempting to play a fool. She laughed.

"You could never lie to me or hide from me Edward, how did you do last night?"

" _MOTHER_ , it is extremely inappropriate for you to ask your _SON_ such a question."

"Oh, hush. Do not play coy with me young man. Out with it," she sounded almost… _eager?_

_My god, how I have longed for someone to kill me now._

However, I gave her a different route, "Why don't you ask her mother, I am sure my wife would be happy to fill you in." I hissed, feeling my face and ears heat up with embarrassment. My father was the only person to ask me such a thing, hell I would not have answered him if he had asked.

_It was a personal matter, and I wished Bella would keep it personal also,_

"You silly boy," mother giggled, stroking my cheek. I rolled my eyes, giving a small, embarrassed smile at her. We walked to the front porch, watching as Alice spoke to Bella and giggled, while my Bella blushed like a tomato.

_Surely, Alice was not asking. Was she?_

I looked at mother, only to find her giggling quietly. I groaned, marching to my sister and snatching her away from my wife.

"Why did you do that brother dear?" she asked, her expression innocent. _Too innocent._ I glared at her, shaking my head in refusal.

"You are still too young to speak of such matters, to your sister-in-law no less." She glared back, putting her hands on her hips,

"I am as old as Bella, and you have no clue to what I have been speaking to her about." She defied.

"Alice, I am warning you, you too mother; stop your eager nonsense this instant. It is not of your concern," I warned. Alice glared some more, while mother just grinned. I huffed, shaking my head.

_Now I understood why mothers and sisters were annoying at times._

"Hello dear," mother smiled, taking Bella in her arms and hugging her. I frowned as I saw Bella's eyes tear up. She closed them and sighed heavily, pulling back.

"Hello Esme," she smiled weakly. Mother shook her head,

"Esme was before you married my son, now I would be very happy if you called me _'mother'_ or _'mommy'_ as Alice calls me." Mother murmured. I heard Bella's chocked sob before she threw her arms around mother and hugged her tightly, her eyes closed and tears ran down her rosy cheeks.

"I would be happy and honored, mother." She chocked, clenching her eyes tightly. I looked at Alice to find her looking sympathetically at Bella with tears in her eyes. She walked toward mother and Bella and joined their feminine hug. I was feeling out of sorts standing in front of them. I awkwardly cleared my throat, gaining their attention.

"I am sorry," Bella apologized. Mother shook her head, "do not apologize dear, everything will be perfect. Just you wait," mother cooed, kissing her cheek and caressing her hair.

_What was happening?_

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

_**Bella** _

We went inside going to the sitting room. It was the first time to see rooms other than our bedchamber, the stairs, and the hallway. We sat the rest of the afternoon, smiling and laughing as we talked about everything and nothing. Alice was a bouncy little thing, flying around the house like a little bee on a working night. Around lunchtime, the bell rang. Alice jumped to her feet and ran to the front door. Esme explained that their maid's daughter, Jane, was going to work for us. I nodded, getting up and walking toward the front door. I saw Alice carrying plates, while a small girl with gold hair and blue eyes carried other plates. She saw me and smiled shyly.

"Hello, Mrs. Cullen. I am Jane, and I will be your maid." She said politely, her cheeks flushing with shyness. I smiled back, going to her and taking a few plates. She objected, stating it was her job, but I insisted, saying I loved to help.

"It was a pleasure to meet you Jane, please call me Bella," I asked gently. Her eyes widened, and she blinked.

"But I cannot possibly call you by your first name. You are the mistress of the house, and I must show respect." She argued. I chuckled,

"I maybe the mistress of the house, but I am a little young to be called Mrs. Cullen" I whispered, "I would sound like an old woman in her forties." I winked, she giggled, nodding.

"I can call you Miss Bella, I cannot call you by your first name with no titles, sorry." She blushed. I nodded, shrugging.

"Fair enough, as long as you do not utter the title Mrs. Cullen, we are good." she smiled, nodding and going to the kitchen. I walked behind her, to learn the route to my most beloved place in the house. As we entered, I saw Esme, Alice and Edward by the counter; Esme and Alice were chopping fruit, and Edward was eating what they chopped. Esme shooed him, hitting him with her towel. When she saw Jane and me, she scowled.

_What? Have I done something wrong?_

"Can you explain to me how on earth could you ask Jane to not call you as Mrs. Cullen, Bella? Are you suggesting that I am _old_?" she glared, however her eyes were shining with mirth and her lips twitched as she attempted not to laugh. I grinned, sighing dramatically,

"Well, it would not be nice for me to be called a Mrs. at all times. I mean I am only seventeen, hence, still a pretty young lady. I wouldn't want to be compared to _old_ women," I teased, raising my eyebrows at her.

"I am thirty-six years old, thank you very much." She stuck her tongue out at me, "I had my Edward here when I was sixteen, so I can hardly be called an _old_ woman." She huffed, scowling playfully. We all laughed, while Edward groaned.

"What is it with women and age? We all grow old, it is not a big matter," Esme smacked his shoulder, "It is a _BIG_ matter to women, son. And don't you dare ask a lady of her age." She warned, while he rolled his eyes, snatching a piece of pineapple and jumping away from Esme before she smacked him once more.

"Al right, Jane, go and prepare the dining room." Esme asked gently. Jane smiled and nodded. I was about to go with her when Esme shook her head, telling Alice to help her. She asked me to help her organizing the food, while ordering Edward to chop more fruit and not eating it. I giggled as he pouted adorably.

After dinner, Jane washed the dishes, while Alice and I reorganized the table. Esme was speaking with Edward in front of the front door, her expression maternal, yet firm. I shrugged and finished with Alice. Before leaving, Esme told me that she and Jane left food for Edward and I. We said our goodbyes and Jane promised to come in the morning to cook us the daily meals before leaving again.

I suggested for Jane to stay and not leave, since she would eventually stay at our maid's room; however, Esme shook her head, indicating that Edward and I were still in our honeymoon. I blushed but nodded.

When they left, and I closed the front door, I turned around to see Edward gazing at me with a heated, carnal expression. I gulped, giving a shy smile and walking toward the stairs. It was three hours to midnight, and it was the time when I usually slept. I skipped the stairs two at a time, wanting to get into bed before he caught up with me. I turned to the shy bride once more, extremely nervous and scared that I would disappoint him.

After washing my face, and changing into a sleeping gown, I got out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. I stopped dead in my tracks as I saw Edward standing by the bed, a smug smirk on his face as slowly and deliberately stalked toward me like a lion stalking a lamb. I started panting, as he got closer and closer still.

He stopped in front of me, his forearm resting on the wall beside me, and his body leaning towards mine. He kissed me lightly, holding my face with his right hand, as he got closer until his body pinned mine to the closed bathroom door.

"Now, what did you think, running away from me like that?" he asked in a husky sensual voice. I looked into his eyes to find him staring into mine with fire and wild abandon. A few seconds passed before he crashed his lips to mine.

_Let's just say that we had a repeat of last night. Twice._

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

_**Edward** _

Pure bliss. That was how the honeymoon passed, in pure bliss. Bella and I spent every waking moment together. In the daylight, we took walks in the garden, gone into the forest, and rode on my horse. We ate lunch and supper in the dining room, listening to music and gazing into each other's eyes.

In the night, we camped in our bedroom, never leaving the bed, and making blissful love to each other.

I knew she was happy, however, sometimes I would catch her gazing sadly at the garden, or having a dolorous glazed over look on her face. I would ask her of it, and she would dismiss it to nothing. I choose to let it go, for it did not disturb our happiness.

We were lying in our bed at night, the clock ticking close to midnight. I was holding her tightly to my chest as I gazed at her sleeping form. Tomorrow would be the first day of our non-honeymoon life, and real life would begin for us as a married couple tomorrow. Strangely, I was prepared for it; perhaps it would work perfectly for us, perhaps our life together would be happy and auspicious. I could not deny the way she enthralled me. She was not like any other woman I had met before. She was sweet, kind, caring, uncannily humorous, and she was beautiful; exceptionally beautiful.

_And she was all mine._

I closed my eyes, savoring the warmth of her body lined up beside mine, and thinking that maybe there is hope for the both of us. I may have thought of having a loveless marriage with her, but secretly, I wanted, no, _needed_ to have a happy matrimonial life; and it was happy with Bella.

 _Time to let go of Tanya._ The voice in my head ordered.

Yes, maybe it is time for that.

As I drifted to sleep, my thoughts were of one thing. To keep Bella happy and to love her, and the past month made me on the road to loving her.

However, what I heard coming out of her lips as she slept crashed every idea of a happy marriage to me.

_"I am sorry Jasper, please forgive me. I love you."_

I froze, staring at her with wide eyes. I pulled away, gazing at her angelic face as she slept. The way she uttered _'I love you'_ was not of a sister / brother affection. She sounded pained and anguished as she said it. Could she be…

_Oh my lord,_

_Jasper? She loves Jasper?_


	9. 8. Dispassion

**Bella**

I woke up around noon, stretching my body like a cat as I attempted to defeat the sleepy fog I seemed to be captured in. I rolled onto my side, grabbing the pillow beside me and hugging it to my chest. A wide grin splayed across my face as I was assaulted by Edward's scent; it was both intoxicating and dominating my senses.

I had had made a vow to myself last night as I drifted to sleep in Edward's arms. I was going to try very hard and make my marriage a successful one. I had seen and felt the way Edward treated me on our honeymoon, and it was everything I have ever dreamed of. I could sense he was also planning and trying to make a success out of our marriage, and I was going to do the same.

That was why I secretly bid Jasper my farewell, apologizing for hurting him. I could only hope for him to find his true lover someday.

I got off the bed, dressed in my morning gown and robe, and strolled out of the bedchamber. I searched for Edward everywhere to no avail. Descending the stairs, I rounded the corner and walked into the kitchen. Jane was making a late breakfast for me.

"Good afternoon, Jane." I smiled, pouring myself a glass of water. Jane grinned happily.

"Good afternoon Mrs. Cullen. I hope you slept well." She offered.

"Yes, thank you Jane. What's for breakfast?" I moved beside her, grabbing a grape berry and eating it.

"Eggs, bacon, bread, and mashed potatoes. I assumed you would be hungry when you've woken up." She said quietly, her cheeks burning slightly as she unintentionally pointed to my physical activities with Edward. I felt my face heat with my own flushness as I recalled the many times we made love together. I could feel my body react to the memories and I shook my head, clearing my throat to remove them from my mind.

"Yes, Jane. Thank you." I smiled softly and she smiled back sheepishly.

"By the way, have you seen Edward?" I asked, wanting to know where he was. I have not seen him ever since I had woken from my sleep. Jane nodded.

"Yes. Mr. Cullen left the house at seven." She answered.

I frowned.

"Did he not mention where he was going?" I asked, feeling a strange sense of dread rising within myself. I shook it away and listened to Jane.

"No ma'am. He hadn't spoken a word. He merely glared at me before he left." Jane gave a sigh. That was odd. Edward was not rude to people, servants or not. And why would he be mad or angered after our magnificent time together?

_I must ask him about it when he returns._

After I ate the breakfast Jane made for me, she came with me upstairs into my room and helped me get dressed for the day. I choose to dress in a creamy white chiffon dress with a beige ribbon tied around the waist. I wore a flat slipper white slipper to go with the dress and decided to tie my long hair in a loose ponytail with a white silk ribbon.

Jane asked permission to go to town and buy the weeks' stock. I agreed, asking her to buy me my preferred lavender perfume. I wanted Edward to be intoxicated by my smell as I am with his.

As soon as Jane left the house, I grabbed a book to read and walked around our garden. The weather was not overly freezing, but it was extremely cold. The snow made trails and left planted footsteps from where I walked. I went to a big tree in the far left side of the garden and sat gently underneath it. I was surrounded by the snow as I started reading my book. As I kept reading, I started thinking seriously of my life with Edward.

I was given to him as a guarantee; an insurance if you will, to pay money for my almost broke family in exchange of my marring him. I have never thought I would be given to a man in such a manner, especially a man who was not Jasper; however, after marrying Edward, spending time with him, watching, and feeling how he treated me I realized that I could make this marriage work. I could try my hardest to make the marriage a successful one and a loving one.

I smiled as I remembered my time with Edward; the beautiful ways we made love together, the way he would look at me with such fire, and the strange tingling feeling I always experienced whenever we touched.

_I realized that I was falling for Edward. And falling fast._

I heard the sound of a horse neighing from a far and I looked around to see Edward's horse running back to the house. I closed my book, quickly got up and started walking fast toward the house. Edward's horse was faster and as I was a few feet away from him, Edward marched straight up to the front door.

"Edward," I called out, watching as he looked at me. The way he looked at me chilled me to the bone. It was not the way Edward always looked at me for the past month; it was not a gentle, loving, almost worshiping looks; it was cold, distant, and uncaring.

_I felt my heart drop._

Edward merely glared at me and then he marched inside the house. I stood rooted to my place, searching my thoughts for a reason to have caused his sudden change of treatment. I found none, therefore I decided to go inside the house and speak with him. Perhaps something else was bothering him or something went wrong with his work.

I walked toward the front door and went inside, closing the door behind me. I saw the remains of icing trailing up the stairs and decided that Edward might have gone to our room. I quickly ran up the stairs and headed to our room. The door was slightly ajar, so I went inside and closed the door behind me.

_The sight before me brought tears to my eyes._

Sitting on the edge of the bed, in only his riding pants, with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands was Edward. I could see his body shaking slightly with the effort of his breathing. I quickly ran to his side, got down on my knees and removed his head from his hands. I gasped as I saw the empty look in his eyes.

"My God Edward. What happened?" I asked, my eyes searching his face. Suddenly, his empty eyes hardened and filled with an angered glare; his jaw clenched and his breathing picked up. I raised my hand, attempting to touch his face when he prevented it.

"Do not touch me." He spat, each word laced with so much venom. I blinked at his harshness.

_Whatever has happened to him?_

"Edward, what is the matter?" I asked, my voice somewhat shaky. He got up too fast I tumbled on my behind on the floor. He was towering over me, his stance menacing and vicious as he stared green fire into me.

"Let me make myself perfectly clear for you," he began, crouching in front of me so that our faces were inches apart. My heart was beating so loud I was positive he could hear it.

"We got married out of an arrangement; there will be no love, no romance, and most certainly no affection on my part. The only affection you'd witness of me is in bed, when we are having sex; because that is all you are good for, a vessel to present me with an heir. You could forget all your hopes and dreams of a happy marriage life, for I will never grant it to you. All you will ever do is to be the mistress of the house, supervise the servants, be a pretty toy on my arm to brag about, and to be at my bid and will in my bed whenever I needed you. Am I understood?"

I stared at him, my mouth agape with shock as I listened to his hurting words. I opened and closed my mouth several times, willing my mind to comprehend his words.

What have I done to cause such hate and anger? What had happened during the hours of the night that changed him from the most gentle and loving man on the planet, to a vicious, cruel, and spiteful man?

He leaned forward, taking a firm grip of my arm and pulling me almost violently to him.

"I said AM I UNDERSTOOD?" he asked again, his voice sounding like a growl.

"Ed—Edward what happened? Wh—what have I done?" I croaked, my voice small. He snorted, releasing me and tumbling me once more on the floor.

"You've done enough. Now, I assume you are clever and you _will_ do as you were told; otherwise, I _will_ make your life a living hell." He spat, marching away from me and into the bathroom.

My vision was blurred with my tears as I lay on the floor, crying my heart out. What have I done? Something must have been done by me to make him change so quickly. I raked my brain for a reason, but came up blank.

_I haven't got a clue to what I have done._

I was still lying on the floor, when Edward came out of the bathroom. I looked at him and thought I saw a flash of sadness in his eyes before he masked it once more with apathy. He was not sad; I was most definitely imagining it. He quickly got dressed, throwing a glare at me and then walked toward the bedroom door, slamming it shut behind him.

The sound of the slam echoed around the empty room. I felt sobs racking my body as I curled up in a fetal position and cried myself to sleep on the floor.

_That was when it was official. I was damned into a loveless empty marriage._

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_"Bella. Bella sweetheart. Wake up please."_ I heard a voice softly commanding and hands shaking me. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself still on the ground; I looked around and saw Esme and Alice shaking me with worried expressions on their faces.

"Oh dear God. Edward, please get me a glass of water." I quickly looked at Edward as he appeared by the foot of the bed. He had a sad look in his eyes as he moved toward me with the water. He crouched beside me and attempted to give me the water, but I pushed him away getting up and storming to the bathroom, slamming the door behind me and locking it.

How dare he act as if he was worried about me after what he had said and done this morning? I looked at myself in the mirror and saw dried tear trails on my cheeks. My eyes were red and swollen, and my face was paler than normal. I splashed cold water on my face, and mobbed some water to my tangled hair and brushed it with my fingers.

I heard a knock on the door.

"Bella, darling open the door." Esme's voice was soothing, motherly and worried. I gritted my teeth, hating what I was about to do. She was nice and sweet to me, but her decision in marrying me to her son has ruined me more than I already was.

It condemned me to a loveless marriage to a hateful man.

_That moment Jasper's handsome face appeared in front of me._

I stifled a sob as his blue eyes stared at me with love and adoration. If it were not for Renee's cruelness, father's weakness, and Esme's proposition; I would have been married to Jasper by now, and I would have spent my life with a man who loved me beyond recognition.

I took a deep breath, and marched to the door. If I was doomed to a non-loving life, I was going to give the treatment I was given in return.

I unlocked and opened the door to see Esme standing in front of it. I saw Alice standing next to Edward who was staring out of the window.

_He did not even have the decency to look at me._

_Bastard._

"Oh lord, what's the matter sweetheart?" Esme asked, attempting to hug me. I pulled away, walking around her and toward my wardrobe.

"I would like to change my clothes." I said, leaving no room for question that I wanted to be alone. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I flinched away.

"Bella, what happened? Tell me." Esme's persistence was both hurting and annoying me. It was hurting me because I was in desperate need for a mother's embrace, and she was a better mother than Renee could ever be. And it annoyed me because my resolve was wavering. I did not want it to waver. I wanted to be strong as I took everything thrown my way. I did not want to be on the ground and kicked while I was down. I wanted to be strong and enduring.

_For once in my life, I wanted to fight back._

"Nothing has happened. Now if you please leave so I can change my clothes." I said in a harsh final tone. I heard heavy footsteps and then the banging on the door slamming to the wall. I did not turn back, still feeling Esme and Alice's presence in the room with me.

"Bella, what happened? Why won't you speak to us?" it was Alice who asked. I sighed heavily, turning around and glaring at her.

"I said I want to change my clothes. So, please LEAVE." I snarled. She blinked, slowly walking toward the bedroom door. She glanced at Esme, who nodded at her. Alice gave me a hurt look before she left. I refused to be affected by it; after all, she was Edward's sister. She could be just as deceiving and cruel.

"I do not know what had caused you to pull away from us dear, from me; but if you ever wanted to speak with me, I am here for you darling." Esme said, and then took hold of my upper shoulders and stared into my eyes.

"You are my daughter now. Whoever and whatever hurts you hurts me also. I will always be there for you dear. Be sure of it." and then she landed a sweet kiss to my cheek and left.

_I was a horrible person. But I was holding my grounds._

_I have had enough with the hurting._

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

The hurt looks I saw in Edward's eyes faded as the days passed. He was true to his promise. He never spoke to me when we were alone, and when we were with others he was barely talkative; only answering whenever he was asked something. Esme and Carlisle noticed and it seemed that Esme did something about it, because Edward unleashed it on me. He was even more ignoring of my presence, only acknowledging me in bed at night. I was only there in body, but my mind and heart closed off. I never initiated anything, and I never moved in synchronization as I did before on our honeymoon. Even when I climaxed, I was silent and quite. I never moaned his name, never wrapped my arms around him, and never screamed his name.

_I simply stopped communicating with him._

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**Edward**

I spent my time in hurt, anger, and sadness. I should have known she would never love me. And being the stupid fool that I am, I fell in love with her. After I left her that morning, I realized what a big mistake I had done. I planned to return and apologize to her, and try my hardest to atone for what I have said. I was extremely pained when I saw her on the ground, wrapped around herself. I planned on doing my best to make her love me, and forget about this _Jasper_. However, my attempts were in vain. The way she asked us to leave her alone, and the way she spoke to my mother with such coldness and nonchalance made me realize that she did not want any of it. I tried over the days to show little by little that I wanted to make it work with her, but she was not with me by mind.

Whenever I glanced at her, I would find her staring off of space or daydreaming about something, probably Jasper. Every time I saw that look on her face, I got angry and I would immediately remember the way she spoke Jasper's name in her sleep and the way she said that she loved him.

She married me for my money. I was mistaken to believe that she was any different from her evil mother, she was not. She was worse. At least, her witch of a mother was obvious, and she showed her evilness and cruelty. Bella however, was the silent type. She was the one who would stab you in the back and laugh about it. Yes, that was exactly what she is.

 _'If you truly believe it, then why does your heart clench whenever you thought that way about her?'_ my inner voice reasoned, quirking an eyebrow. I silenced him with a punch.

_She was making me lose my mind and sanity._

Even the times we were making love, she was not responsive; not verbally anyway. The first time after our honeymoon and after the ordering I gave her, I decided to be with her as we were in our honeymoon thinking that it was overly cruel of me to ask of her to be at my beck and call whenever I wanted her in such a harsh way; however her reactions sealed it for me, or lack there of. She never responded, never made a sound. She would just lie there and take it. No sound, movement or whimper would escape her. She did not even touch me or do something that would show me she even wanted to work anything.

That was when I truly realized it.

_My heart was broken for the second time, only this time it was ten times worse._


	10. 9. The Hurt Of A Loved One

**Bella**

It has been another month and still my relationship with Edward was bad. Our communication was next to nothing and the only time I found someone to speak to was when Alice, Rosalie or Esme visited me or invited me to visit them.

I would catch Esme staring at me with sad eyes, and I thought that perhaps she knew of my strained marriage with Edward.

One day, Esme has invited me for tea with her and Alice. I accepted wholeheartedly, even though I promised myself to not drift entirely with them; however, with Esme it was nearly impossible. Whenever I in a bad place or in need for someone to just hold me, she would always be there for me, and she would always hug me and assure me that everything would be alright. I would always find myself clinging to her for dear life, and with stray tears finding their way down my cheeks.

She was the mother I have always wished for, and I was hateful to her. It was not her fault that her son was a cruel, heartless, and a twofaced man who took pleasure in watching me flying over the clouds in happiness only to drag me under the ground and bury me.

Esme and I were in her garden. She was quite fond with it, she would always tell me that beside her husband and two children this garden has always been her haven; she would always sit amongst the various flowers and roses that she planted and she would sit still and sniff the aroma of the most hypnotizing fragrances.

"I know that you and Edward are quarreling Bella, or more like had the quarrel and now in the non-communication phase." Esme spoke suddenly. I glanced at her and saw a sad look in her eyes. I looked at my hands, which were fiddling with the ribbon of my dress. She put her hand on mine and squeezed lightly. I looked up at her with tears in my eyes.

"Oh poor dear, whatever happened between you two?" she asked, crushing me to her chest for the millionth time. I started crying and sobbing in her arms, feeling my chest tightening and my stomach clenching with the effort.

"I am here my sweet. You can tell me anything." She cooed, running her fingers through my hair and rocking us back and forth.

As I kept crying on her shoulder, the magnitude of everything that has happened had pressed on my chest, making it nearly impossible to breath.

That was when I have decided to confide in her with everything; from kissing Jasper on my wedding day, to Edward's cruelty after the ending of our honeymoon.

"Esme, there are things I would like to confide in you with; but I would like for you not to hate me or think of me differently afterward." I sniffed, begging to understand.

"Oh you sweet child, I could never hate you. You can tell me everything and anything you ever wanted." She caressed my cheek, giving me a motherly embrace.

"Alright. I will start from the beginning. I had a best friend named Jasper, he is Rose's brother and he has always been close with me. We grew up together, played together, and took tutoring lessons together. He was my friend, my savior, and my shelter whenever Renee upset me. One day, he confessed his love for me and I was over the moon because I myself had had feelings for him. I was fifteen and he was eighteen at the time. He had spoken with father and implied his desire in asking for my hand in marriage. Father welcomed him but advised to wait until I was of a proper age as father still thought of me as his little girl." I stopped to take a breath and watched as Esme sat quietly, listening to my story.

"Father, Jasper, and I were secretly planning things, along with Emmett and Rosalie. We have not told Renee a single word of the matter, because we all knew that she would do something to sour our happiness. Quickly, the days and weeks had passed, and Jasper was close to his twentieth birthday when he told me he was volunteering in the battalion. His dream was to become a soldier and he has always waited for the opportune moment. I was both frightened and happy for him; knowing how the battalion and war could bring death and destruction, but also happy that he was finally achieving his dream."

"I was counting the days and nights after he left, awaiting the arrival of his twentieth birthday and consequently his return to properly ask father for my hand. One day, I had received a letter from him, in which he explained his inability to return at the moment. He promised to return as soon as he possible and I sent him an answer with my love and nostalgia for him, promising to wait for his return. However, my promise was broken when Renee informed me of her agreement with you on marrying Edward. My dreams were crushed with such news and I have tried to evade such matter, but Renee addressed the fact that father was on the brinks of bankruptcy and that your money was much needed. Therefore, I had to sacrifice my love for Jasper and agree to marry Edward."

I kept speaking, choosing to look at the ground the whole time I was narrating the story. I could feel Esme gaze on me, but I would not look up and meet her eyes.

"When I first met Edward, I admit I was attracted to him. He was such a handsome and charming man, and he was gentle and tender with me. But one time, when our wedding was nearing, he told me that our marriage was of a business like matter and that I should not expect a loving marriage. I begrudgingly agreed because he was right, and I had to let go of my romanticism and start living in the reality."

I stopped talking when I head Esme mutter _'foolish boy'_ , but I continued after a few much needed breaths.

"On the wedding ceremony, I had come to terms with my life, letting go of every fantasy and delusion of a marriage to a man I loved and he loves me back. I was dragged back to my old memories and dreams when I saw Jasper in the wedding. He had come to the wedding to ask me to run away with him. I had refused, stating that I was already married and that I had promised father to do it. He was so heartbroken that I felt my resolve wavering but I stood my grounds. That was when he decided to resolve to his last resort." I fiddled with my hands and stopped talking, feeling my face heat up and my eyes fill with tears.

"What last resort dear?" Esme asked, her voice quite. I sighed.

"He—k—kissed me, and I—I kissed him back." I whispered. She took a deep breath.

"Go on." She urged.

"When I felt him become overly enthused with the kiss, I remembered I was already married and whether I responded to him, it was going to be the last kiss between us. I told him this and that I was married to Edward, and that I would never leave father in shame or poverty. He—he became hurt and angered, promising me to never show me his face again and he went to the battalion."

I chanced a glance at Esme, and I saw a mixture of sadness, pride, and love in her eyes.

"My sweet, my heart breaks hearing you tell me your story and it makes me feel such immense guilt for forcing the marriage of my son upon your shoulders. I am dreadfully sorry for what has become of you and Jasper, but you are married to Edward now, and I believe that you should try to get him closer to you. Marriage is a tremendous responsibility, and it sometimes takes years for the married couple to be able to thoroughly understand one another. Now, I know that my boy is a little stubborn and hotheaded at times, but I assure you that he has a good heart and a caring soul, and I already know what a beautiful heart you have. I have no doubt that someday, you and my son will become the happiest married couple." She tenderly caressed my hair. I shook my head.

"No Esme, you do not understand. Edward has made it perfectly clear for me that he does not want the typical marriage." I felt tears fall down my face and Esme frowned.

"Has something else happened?" she asked quietly, and then her eyes illuminated with recognition.

"Does it involve the morning after the last day of your honeymoon?" she asked. I nodded.

"Oh dear, what happened child?"

"The day after the honeymoon, I woke up alone. I asked Jane if she had seen Edward and she said he went for a ride with his horse and he was less than pleasant toward her. Around midday, he returned and I tried speaking with him but he left me and ran inside the house and up to our bedchamber. I went after him and found him with an angered and hurt expression on his face. I tried asking what was wrong, and he raged against me; telling me that I would never win his love and that the honeymoon was the only time for me to be happy with him. He also—he informed me that I—I was merely a vessel, a bowl to produce him with an heir. He has changed juristically after the honeymoon. He was so sweet, loving, and gentle and he seriously made me believe that he started having feelings for me. The strange thing also was that I could feel myself start to fall for him. How could I when I have loved Jasper for years? How can it be Esme? Is it possible? Or is God finding happiness in tormenting me? What have I ever done to deserve this Esme? Why me?" I broke down in her arms; my sobs were making it difficult for me to breath. She held me in her arms, crooning to me and caressing my hair.

"Hush my sweet. All will be alright." She said, kissing my hair. "That boy is so stupid sometimes; he makes me want to take him across my knees." She muttered. I pulled back, staring up at her and wiping my eyes.

"What do you mean?" she sighed.

"What I mean is that from a feeling I have and completely certain about is that my son is madly in love with you. He is only too proud to admit it, that and—" she stopped. I raised my eyebrows at her.

"And what?"

"Listen, Edward went through something two years ago that shook his trust in women; but once he saw you, even though he opened his stupid mouth and spewed those idiotic words of your marriage I could see it in his eyes. He was falling for you, and I believe he has fallen completely for you sweetie." I shook my head.

"No Esme, you did not see the way he acted and spoke to me that afternoon. He was different, and complete contradiction from the honeymoon. He was so cruel to me." I felt more tears falling over my face. She sighed.

"I have no idea what has gotten into that boy. I have spoken with him after that day we found you on the floor, but he wouldn't say a word. All he did was glare at me and tell me that nothing happened. Are you sure nothing happened dear?" her eyes were worried.

"I honestly don't know Esme. I swear to you, I don't know." I sniffed.

We spent the next few minutes in silence, and then I asked her the question that plagued me.

"Esme?"

"Yes darling,"

"If I really loved Jasper, how come I am having these strong feelings for Edward? Sometimes I sit by myself and think about it and I find myself questioning if I was falling in love with him? I know it must be rude of me to ask you, my husband's mother such a question; but you know how Renee is, and I certainly cannot speak to Rose or Alice of it. How can it be?" I started crying once more. She kissed my cheek, giving a sad smile.

"It happens my darling. Sometimes we can love more than one person at a time." my eyes widened at her explanation. She let out a small laugh.

"Yes, it happens. You could love someone and built hopes and dreams with them, and one day you set your eyes on someone else for the first time and things just connect. You feel as if the whole world had disappeared and that you and that other person are in a bubble of your own, having eyes only for one another. It's called soul mate." She smiled.

"But Jasper is my soul mate? Is he not?" I asked, confused and worried beyond reason. She gave me a sad look.

"Perhaps, and perhaps the reason you have had the thought because of your closeness to him; but sometimes it takes a lot of pain and suffering, and so many affairs to happen for things to finally set themselves in the right order. You just need to have some patience and give Edward some time. You will be rewarded in the end"

I sat in silence, absorbing her words still not convinced with the parts involving Edward.

I suppose time will till.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x**

We were at Carlisle and Esme's house. She had invited us all to dinner and we agreed. We sat around the table, waiting for the arrival of Rosalie and Emmett, since they were the only ones absent from the gathering.

"Well, I believe they must have been detained. Let us start, and once they arrive we shall present their share." Esme said with a small smile. We all nodded; Carlisle said a prayer and we started to eat.

Our meal however, was interrupted with the worst news someone could ever hear. There was frantic knocking on the door and after a few seconds, we saw Rosalie and Emmett storming inside the house and toward the dining room. Emmett had a worried expression on his face and he was trying his hardest to calm a distraught Rosalie. Rosalie's expression however was ten times more worried than Emmett's, adding to it her fearful and gloomy face. She scanned the dinning table until her eyes landed on me and I was appalled to see tears forming in her eyes and falling down her cheeks. I quickly got up and walked toward her, catching her in time when she fell into my arms in a sobbing mess. I looked up at Emmett to see a grim look on his face.

"Emmett, what is the matter? What happened?" I asked, finding myself for some reason having a dreadful feeling. It was partial to Emmett and Rose's expression, but it also was related to something else, which I did not comprehend.

"There were bad news Bella. Very bad news." Emmett said in a chocked voice, to which Rose sobbed even harder. Esme came around me and took Rose into her arms and she sagged against her, clutching at her dress.

"Whatever the matter dear? Tell us." Esme soothed. Rosalie sniffled a few times.

"J—J—Jas—sper. Jasper." Was all Rosalie said, but it was enough to send my buckling to my knees. Emmett was closer to me and he held me up against his chest as I stared at Rosalie, waiting for her to go on.

"What of Jasper? What happened to him?" I asked, my voice nearly a whisper. Rosalie started sobbing once more, her heart-wrenching cries cutting into my heart like a blunt knife. I turned to look at Emmett who was looking at me with a somber expression.

"Jasper—has been—hurt in battalion. He was honorably discharged from the army and was sent back home. His injuries are—worse than we thought and he has a long way to heal as far as the doctor's opinions. William and Katherine are with him in the hospital as we speak." He finished, his eyes never leaving mine. By the time he finished, I let out a sob and clutched at him, burying my face in his chest and crying. I could hear Rosalie hiccupping quietly in the background, as I kept crying and sobbing.

"I – must go see him. I—ha—have t—to—too. P—please em—Emmett, t—take me to h—him." I stuttered, looking up at him with pleading eyes. He nodded, wiping my tears away and grabbing my hand.

"We apologize Carlisle, Esme for interrupting your dinner, but Bella has to come with us."

"Of course dear. Carlisle, Alice, Edward, and I will follow closely. It is duty to go and see how he is." Esme fretted, her voice soothing yet scared. She had the biggest, tenderest heart a person could have. She was scared for someone she had only seen once and had not spoken to him more than a few words, and yet she was willing to go to him and help him with his demise.

"Thank you Esme." Rosalie whispered brokenly. Esme gave a sad smile and kissed Rose's cheeks before helping her up and giving her back to Emmett. I was very distracted by Jasper's ill news that I almost did not notice the dark and angry look on Edward's face. He did not look dolorous or grieved, he looked angered and spiteful. I did not have the time for his mental altercations as I had more important people to look after.

_He is your husband; he is supposed to be the most important one you look after._

_He does not want you, therefore you are entitled to look after the ones that do._

Two voices spoke to me in my head and I shook it violently, ridding my mind from such insanity.

_The last thing I wanted was to start talking to voices in my head. I did not want to add madness to my endless list of grief._

Emmett grabbed both mine and Rose's hands and walked us out of the house and into a carriage. On the way to the hospital, I held Rose in my arms as I silently cried. My mind wandered to all scenarios and I felt tugging at my heart when I thought of the most blasphemous one.

Jasper could not die. I would happily live with the idea of him hating me and be apart from him, but I could never stomach the thought of him seizing to exist.

The mere thought sent painful tugging at my chest.

No, he will live. He has to live.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x**

The moment I saw him, I nearly collapsed. He was lying on a hospital bed, his body encased in a sleeping shirt and covered with a creamy sheet. His slightly tanned face was deathly pale and filled with cuts and bruising. His body looked limp and weak as if he could not even lift up a feather. My heart broke at the sight of him; he has always been one of the strongest men I have ever known, so full of strength and watching him so fragile and helpless shattered my very soul.

I went to his bed, carefully sitting myself beside his head and started running my fingers through his hair. My eyes were blurred with tears as I gently caressed his head. Rosalie was sat on his other side, her hands doing the same caressing mine were doing, and Emmett sat by his feet.

I did not know how long it has been before we saw Esme, Carlisle, and Alice entering the room. Esme quickly went to Jasper's side beside me and caressed his bruised cheek.

"Oh you poor boy, you do not deserve such pain." I saw a stray tear fall down her cheek. Carlisle stepped ahead and read his medical chart.

"How is he doing Carlisle? Please, do not lie to me." My voice was shaky when I spoke.

"At the moment, he is not very well Bella. He has sustained severe injuries and it will take some time for him to heal, what is most important is for him to wake up." He explained.

As he finished, I saw Edward enter the room. His expression was still angered, but I saw a flash of sadness cross his face when he saw Jasper's form. His eyes then met mine and there were many different looks crossing them. Guilt, pain, sadness, and fury. His changing moods were seriously giving me whip lashing and my current state of mind and emotions were not in the perfect sitting for them.

A few minutes later, when we were all seated the door to Jasper's room opened and entered William, Katherine, and Jasper's longtime friend and brother in arms Peter.

"Oh Bella, look what has become of Jasper. My little boy." Katherine wailed, throwing her arms around me and sobbing in agony. I hugged her to my chest, running my fingers through her frizzy hair and whispering soothing words. William came and joined our hug, crushing us between his arms. He did not have to say a word; one look from his eyes said it all.

_His silenced grief was more painful the grieving out in the open._

After William and Katherine let me go, but not without Katherine still holding my hand in hers; Peter walked toward us and pulled me into his arms. I have come to like Peter and his wife Charlotte and we have written to each other every once and a while.

"How are you Bella?" he whispered in my ears, his voice sad. I pulled back and looked into his eyes and saw all I needed to know. Jasper had told him of my marriage and Peter looked saddened by the events that occurred.

"As good as to be expected. How is Charlotte, and little Peter?" I gave a small smile.

He grinned somewhat "My Char and Pete are perfect. They send their hellos."

"Send mine back to them." I smiled, squeezing his arm.

After everyone was seated, Carlisle turned and looked at Peter.

"Mr. Henderson, I understand that you were Jasper's friend and partner in the battalion. Could you explain to us how did this happen?" I saw Peter squirm in his seat and glance at Jasper. After a few moments, he sighed and started to speak.

"Jasper has returned to the battalion a changed man. He did not give any more explanations of what caused his immense distress; however, he has dedicated all his time and effort for the drill, more so than he was before." He gave me a sideway glance and I pretended not to notice. I looked at Esme and saw a sad look on her face. She mouthed _'sorry'_ to which I gave a sad smile.

"It was four days ago when it happened. We were training on how to use explosives and other detonations. Jasper was amongst a few other soldiers who were in the same troop. We did not notice it but some of the explosives were out of date. Jasper was the head of the troop and was as you could say in the line of fire. In shortening, Jasper took the worst of it, along with a few other soldiers who were on his heels. The other has sustained similar injuries, but Jasper is the only one sustaining a coma." Both Rose and Katherine let out sobs after Peter had finished. My vision was blurred with my tears as I held Katherine in my arms that for the second time wrapped herself around me and cried. I wiped my eyes with my free hand and looked up and saw Alice's body shaking with sobs. Esme was holding her and soothing her while she cried. I do not know why I had a strange feeling about it, but I quashed it down. She was sad to hear such story; that was all.

"Well, all we can do now is waiting for him to wake up. His physical injuries and wounds were swathed and bandaged. The only thing we await for is him gaining back his consciousness." Carlisle concluded. We all nodded, sitting around Jasper and quietly speaking to one another.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

It was time for Peter to leave, stating that he was going home to his wife and son. He has taken their and his presence for granted and now he wanted to stay with his family as much as possible. He hugged me goodbye, promising to communicate sometime soon. I informed him to send my warm regards to Char and Little Pete. He smiled and nodded, kissing my cheek.

The room now was empty of everyone except Rose, Emmett, William, Katherine, Edward, and me. Carlisle, Esme, and Alice needed to leave; but not before Carlisle spoke to Jasper's attending doctor and took his case from him. I saw a flash in Edward's eyes then but it disappeared just as quickly.

Alice tried convincing her parents of staying, but Carlisle informed her that only family was allowed. She protested of Edward's presence and they told her that he was staying until the proper hours were over so that he could take me back to our home.

Time passed with no progress. Jasper's battered body refused to move or acknowledge anyone. The proper visiting hours were over and we had to leave. Only his parents were allowed to stay. William told Katherine to take Rose home while he and Emmett would stay with him. Katherine was about to protest when the door burst open and my father entered. He gasped at the sight of Jasper and went straight to William and Katherine. He gave William a brotherly hug while he crushed Katherine in his arms as she sobbed. After she finally stopped, he gave Rose a kiss on the forehead and then turned and walked toward me taking me in his arms. I felt my eyes will up once more but I ordered them not to cry anymore. I was so tired of crying.

Father told Katherine that he would stay with William and Emmett. Katherine and Rose left in their carriage while Edward took me behind him on his horse.

I wrapped my arms tightly around his midsection as we rode through the streets. I could feel the bulging of his muscles as they tensed while riding the horse. Until now, the only sad look I saw on Edward's face was when he saw Jasper, before that all I ever saw was anger and hate, mixed with guilt and sadness. I did not know the reason behind such emotions and I was starting to really tire of them.

We reached out house, and Edward helped me off the horse. We went inside and I walked up the stairs and straight to my room. I was about to close the door when Edward held it with his hand, pushing it and entering the room. I sighed, going to the bathroom and changing into my sleeping gown. I went back to the room and got into the bed. Edward was already there, laying his back on the headboard, his naked chest illuminated in the moonlight. I swallowed, moved to my side of the bed and went under the covers. I saw Edward staring at me with a strange expression. He opened and closed his mouth several time as if he wanted to say something. He finally sighed, leaned closer to me and kissed my forehead.

"Goodnight Bella." Was all he said before he turned around and adjusted his head on his pillow. I was staring at his back with my mouth wide open. I seriously considered Edward suffering a mental illness. His moods were shifting rapidly as if they were adjusted to the moon; shifting every time it appeared.

I shook my head, sighed and then flopped on my pillow. Right now, I needed my sleep; later I would thing things over.

_But first, I would go and see Jasper first thing in the morning._


	11. 10. Confrontation

**Edward**

I woke up to an empty bed. I rolled onto my side with my eyes still closed and extended my arm to wrap it around Bella's body only to find her side of the bed empty and cold. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself alone in our bed. Her side was neatly made and it was void of the warmth of her flesh.

I sighed heavily, already knowing where she went. To see him.

Jasper.

If I were being honest with myself, I was sad to see the way he looked in the hospital. Although I despised him for taking Bella from me, I felt sorry for the man. He looked as if a speeding train hit him and if it were not for the rising and falling of his chest, I would have thought he was dead.

However, his demise was not enough to make my sadness last.

Because, once again, he had taken Bella from me.

My Bella.

_My wife._

The way she collapsed when Emmett and Rosalie told us the news of Jasper's incident had many emotions stirring within me. Anger, hatred, jealousy, and hurt. I was angered to see her in such state for a man other than myself, her own husband. I felt hurt for two reasons; her reaction to another man's woe, and the way she felt pain caused hurt to grip me. She was my wife, and I loved her; regardless of what happened, I loved her and it hurt me to see her in such pain. The jealousy and anger were toward him, because he has stolen her from me once again. He found his way into her life and heart once more, only this time with a more dramatic effect.

_I hated this man with a passion._

However, as I lay on my back staring up the ceiling my mind was set.

I was going to confront Bella tonight, and I would speak with her regarding Jasper. We have to speak of it, and see what needs to be done.

_I only hope that nothing had happened between the two of them._

***O*O*O***

**Bella**

I woke up early in the morning. Looking to my right, I saw Edward sleeping soundly and peacefully. I gave a small smile as I watched his sleeping form. His normally brooding and frowning face was smooth and calm, his pink lips were slightly parted and his breath was fanning over my face. Even in his sleep, his breathing smelt delicious; of honeysuckle and mint. He looked many years younger when asleep, the calmness serenity of the world plastered on his face.

_He was even more handsome when he was sleeping._

My eyes traveled down his body and I felt my breathing hitch with desire. Yes, when we christened our bed every night, I did my hardest to not show any feelings to him. I did not want him to see the effect he had on me; but no matter how much I recant it, I could not deny his beauty. He was the epitome of male beauty, and every day his handsomeness increased.

I may have been blessed with a handsome husband, but his attitude and treating of me war far from handsome; after the honeymoon finished anyway.

I shook my head, clearing it from all thoughts Edward and slowly got off the bed. I had a busy day and I wanted to be at the hospital as early as I could. Jasper needed me, despite his hatred of me and anger at me, I knew he needed me.

_This time, I will be there for him._

Slowly, I got out of the bed and into the bathroom. After finishing my morning bath, I emerged back into the room and got dressed. After I was dressed, I chanced a glance at Edward and felt a small smile tugging at the corner of my mouth.

His sleeping face was the complete opposite of his awakened face. It was peaceful, calm, and childlike; meanwhile his awake face was always angered, saddened, or carrying unfathomable expressions.

I leaned down and gently planted a small kiss on his forehead. No matter what he had done, I knew that I would always care for him. He was my husband after all, and I would not be a good wife if I had not acted as one.

_For myself at least._

"I will be back soon. Sleep well." I whispered, feeling a strange tugging to my chest and my eyes burning with tears. Why was I having such strange feelings was beyond me.

I was planning to go to see Jasper with Emmett or Rose, and I was surprised to see that Esme and Alice had been waiting for me in the sitting room.

_What on earth were they doing here?_

"Bella darling, good morning." Esme smiled, pulling me into her arms. I smiled back.

"Good morning to you too Esme. How are you?"

"Oh, I'm perfectly well dear." she smiled. I nodded, looking at Alice, who had a sad expression on her face. I walked toward her and pulled her into my arms.

"Whatever is the matter, Alice? Why are you so sad?" I asked. She shrugged, and I saw a slight blush spreading across her cheeks. Esme coughed lightly, coming up behind me and taking our hands.

"She was just upset by the sight of Jasper in the hospital. It was the first time she ever saw such a sight of an injured man." Esme answered, her eyes staring into Alice's with firmness. I looked from between the two of them but then shrugged, mentally confirming it.

_Any person would collapse at the sight of severely injured Jasper._

"Where is Edward?" Alice asked, averting her eyes from mine.

_What was the matter with that girl?_

"He is still sleeping. I did not want to wake him up and tire him." I answered, intending on keeping my answer vague and simple. There was no need for Alice also to know of the tiff between me and her brother.

"Well, let him stay asleep. I believe you were on your way to see Jasper, yes?" Esme asked with a small smile.

"Yes, I was planning on going with Emmett or Rosalie." I concluded. She nodded.

"Well, they will visit him late in the day and I took liberty in accompanying you along with Alice, if that's alright." She started, staring at me. I wanted to go see Jasper with either Rosalie or Emmett, or at least go see him first by myself; but seeing, as Esme and Alice were already present, I had not another choice.

"Of course, Esme." I said, giving a small smile.

Before we left, I told Jane to inform Edward of my departure with his mother and sister to the hospital. The last thing I needed was for him to blow it out of proportion if he thought I went there alone.

**OoOoO**

The moment we entered his room, I felt my eyes fill with tears as I saw his own eyes opened and staring up at the ceiling. I let out an involuntary gasp and he heard it, shifted his head to the right and landing his eyes on me.

So many emotions crossed his bruised face. Longing, pain, slight anger and desperation. His eyes were swollen still but he was able to open them. His face was still bruised and battered and it tugged at my heart to see him in such a way.

I was pulled out of my thought by his hoarse voice.

"B—Bella?" he whispered, a tear falling from his eye and down to his ear. I sprinted toward him, gently wrapping my arms around him and hugging him.

"Oh Jasper, I am so very sorry for what happened to you. Very sorry." I cried, my own tears falling down on his hair and forehead. He gently touched my arm, prompting me to look at him. He gave a small smile as he weakly lifted his arm and wiped my tears away.

"Don't cry Bells. I am alright." He whispered, couching a few times. I saw Esme's hand in front of his face holding a glass of water. I helped Jasper up and he took a few sips before couching once more and laying his head back on the pillow.

"How are you feeling dear?" she asked, her voice filled with motherly affection. Jasper grimaced and whimpered.

"Like I have been exploded into a million pieces." He whimpered once more before he all together shut his mouth.

"It will pass soon and you shall be better." Alice's small voice echoed through the room. Jasper slowly turned his head and looked at her and I saw something flashing on his face before he masked it away. I felt a strange tugging in the pit of my stomach but quickly squashed it away.

"Is there something you would like for me to bring you dear?" Esme asked in a gentle voice. He weakly shook his head and thanked her. Esme smiled and told us she and Alice would leave so that we could have some privacy. They had seen him awake and were glad. Alice seemed unwilling to leave but Esme dragged her out of the room.

The room was filled with silence as we stared at each other. His eyes went back and forth as they searched my face. He opened and closed his mouth a few times as if he wanted to say something. I was staring back at him, my eyes watering each time they fell on his bruised skin. He was still the handsome man under all the blue-purple colors and I lightly raised my hand and touched his cheek. He closed his eyes and gave a quite sigh.

"I am sorry Bella." He whispered, breathing deeply. I frowned. What could he possible be apologizing about?

"Whatever for?" I asked, gently running my fingers through his hair. He opened his eyes and stared at me as he spoke.

"For what I did at your wedding. For being cruel and cold-hearted to you. For kissing you without your consent while you were married to another man, and for implying that you elope with me. I should not have said nor done such things, and for that I am terribly sorry. My mother had raised me better than this and she would take me across her knees if she ever found out what I had done to you." He whispered, his eyes filling with tears.

"No Jasper, you had every right to act in such a way. You were hurt and angered and you did the one thing that would make you feel less pained. You returned to find the woman you were willing to marry had already married another man. Your heart could not bare it and letting it out in such a form was perfectly normal and understandable. You should not be sorry, for you have done nothing. The one thing that matters is that your are alive and well, nothing else matters." I whispered, my voice shaky with my emotions.

"What I did to you would always be burned into my brain. I realized it truly, when I was injured; the moment the explosives set off it was as if my life was running in slow motion. I heard every harsh word I said to you clearly, and I saw your tear-stained face as if you were standing right in front of me. I had prayed over and over for God to keep me alive so that I could have a chance to apologize to you, and tell you how sorry I was. That near death experience has opened my eyes Bella. It has taught me to let go of the anger and pain, or at the very least do my best to let them go; and I would start with you Bella. I will let you go, I will from now on be only your best friend and brother. Your love will always reside in my heart, but for the sake of your sanity and mine, I will let you go."

I was silently crying, listening at his words. He was willing to sacrifice it all for me, going as far as approving of remaining my beat friend and now brother instead of lover.

_The only problem was that he decided this when Edward clearly wanted nothing to do with me._

"How are you doing Bella? In your—marriage I mean." He asked, his voice lowering when he said the word _'marriage'_. I sighed, giving a small fake smile.

"It's—alright. I'm having a good life." He sensed my hesitation and immediately pointed to it. I just shook my head and kept silent. I did not want to speak of it nor did I want to upset him.

He was already experiencing enough heart and body ache as it is.

"Bella, you look sad. Talk to me." He pressed.

"I am sad because you are injured Jasper; what else would I be sad about?" I asked, my tone evasive. He gave me the look he always gave me when he knew I was lying to him.

"Is he good to you?" he suddenly asked. I froze, my mind and heart screaming no, but my mouth had a different answer.

"Yes Jasper. He is good to me." Whatever happened, and no matter how harsh and cruel Edward was to me, he was still my husband and I must never speak an ill word of him.

"Alright. If you say so." He whispered, not convinced.

_However, it was the end of the discussion._

***O*O*O***

The rest of the day was spent with me in Jasper's room. His parents, Esme and Alice once more, Peter, Rose, and Emmett joined us. Esme was somewhat uncomfortable while Alice was almost jumping off her chair to go somewhere. I held my tongue, not wanting to be rude to Alice, but she was acting strangely. Esme, would also give her stern looks to which Alice seemed unaffected by. Eventually, Esme gave up and concentrated on her conversation with Katherine. Rose, Emmett, and I were immersed in a conversation with Jasper, while Alice stayed close by as a listener who put a word here and there.

By the end of the day, Carlisle showed up to look over Jasper's injuries. He stated that he would stay at the hospital for another week, and then he would be released back home. However, he would be on bed rest for another week to ensure the quick healing of his injuries. Katherine and Rose assured Carlisle that Jasper would be safe with them; also, Esme volunteered to help alongside Alice.

It was nighttime when once again Edward showed at the hospital. He spared Jasper a look and a nod and then turned to me.

"Are you ready to go home?" he asked, his voice strained and gruff. I nodded begrudgingly; not wanting to leave Jasper's side. Rose and Emmett told me to go, assuring that they would keep their eyes on him. I have wanted so badly to kiss his cheeks or forehead before I leave, but I knew that it would be inappropriate with Edward in the same room.

"Bye Jasper. I will come see you again soon." I said, giving a small smile. He returned it weakly and turned his eyes to Edward.

"Keep her safe." Was all he said, his eyes staring into Edwards. Edward stared back with equal intensity and then nodded. I stood there, staring at them in confusion; it seemed that they had a moment where a man's mind spoke to another's.

_My God, men could be strange at times._

Once went outside of the hospital, Edward took a firm yet gentle hold of my hand. I looked at our joined hands, and then up into his eyes. He was gazing at me with a very fierce expression.

"Bella, there is something that I believe we need to discuss together. Would you mind if we talk before going straight to bed tonight?" he asked, his eyes conveying his apparent desperation.

_What could he possibly be extremely desperate to speak to me about?_

"Of course. Whatever you prefer." I replied, feeling my heart hammering in my chest for some unknown reason.

We rode our way to our house, the cool wind blowing in my face making my hair fly behind me. I shivered a little from the cold and tightened my arms around Edward's waist. One of his hands took hold of my forearm and gave a squeeze of assurance. At least that is what I thought it was.

We reached our home and Edward went straight to the stable. He helped me down, took my hand and walked us toward the horse's stall. He let him in, refilling his water bucket and left him some food. He turned around and once again, took hold of my hand walking us toward our house. I was confused and frightened from his change of treatment; my gut telling me that he was going to do or say something that would hurt me as he had done before. However, I had no other choice but to follow him inside and let him lead me upstairs to our bedchamber.

"Please, have a seat Bella." He said softly, gesturing to the couch. I obeyed, walking toward the bed, taking off my coat and then sat on the edge. Edward took off his suit jacket and vest; opened the first three buttons of his shirt and rolled his sleeves up to his elbows. His sight shortly distracted me. The way his white shirt flowed over his upper body making him look more muscular and enticing than ever.

_My God, I was doomed._

"Alright. I believe there are things that need to be spoken aloud. I approve of your visits to Jasper because as I have come to know he is your best friend; however, there are certain things that I must speak off so that my mind is put at ease." He started, dragging a chair and sitting in front of me. He was staring at me intently and I was very much confused for what he was saying.

"I know that I have been somewhat—cruel to you after our honeymoon ended," he went on and I could not hide the flinch that escaped me as he mentioned it. He cringed himself and frowned, to which I was confounded by his words and expression.

_What does he has in store for me?_

"For that, I—apologize. I should not have acted or mistreated you in such a way; but what I have heard you speak in your sleep hurt me more deeply than anyone could ever have."

"Wait, what are you talking about? I do not understand Edward." I sighed, not knowing what he was getting at. He sighed also, running his hands over his face roughly.

"The last night of our honeymoon, after you went to sleep I heard you speak in your sleep." I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment. I thought I had outgrew this habit, but unfortunately I have not; still, I do not think there was anything I would have spoken that would unleash such horrid reaction from my husband.

"What did I ever say Edward that would make you turn from the most loving man to the cruelest one?" I gritted, feeling my eyes brimming with tears of hurt and transgression.

"You said that you were sorry and that you—" he stopped looking pained. I swallowed, suddenly not wanting to know.

"You said that you—loved Jasper."

_Time stopped._

As I stared wide-eyed at Edward's pained face, I sat on the bed, my whole body frozen with shock and fear. Edward heard me say I loved Jasper? No wonder he was treating me horribly.

_I am a terrible wife._

"Oh God," I gasped, covering my mouth with both my hands as I stared at Edward with teary eyes. He had every right to treat me in such a way. I was so horrible, confessing albeit in my sleep to my undoubting husband and on our honeymoon no less that I loved another man. I deserve to die.

"Is it true Bella? Please be honest with me." He said, his eyes searching mine. Suddenly, I shot out of the bed, and started pacing the room. I should have known that it would come out, and that he would find out about it. Damn you Renee for convincing me of not telling him.

I must tell him. I have to. He has a right to know.

I turned around to face him, my shoulders hunched and my cheeks wet from my tears.

"I suppose I should tell you everything." Then I started with my story, telling him everything about my father's debts, the agreement between Esme and Renee, and my story with Jasper. I even told him of our kiss in my wedding, thinking that if I were completely honest with him, it would make matters easier for us.

_Oh, how wrong I was._

He was silent, quietly absorbing what I was saying and it put me on edge. I wanted him to tell me what he thought, what he would do.

Anything was better than his calculated silence.

"Say something," I blurted. He snorted angrily.

"What do you want me to say?" he snarled, and I flinched. He got up and stalked toward me until he was mere inches close. He was towering over me, his eyes blazing a green fire as he stared down at me. He was breathing heavily and for a moment, I feared he would smack me.

"So, let me analyze the situation fully," he started, his voice deathly calm with an angered edge to it. I swallowed, hard.

"Not only did you marry me for my family's coins, but you hid from me and my mother the fact that you were to be given to another man? And said man had showed up on _our_ wedding asking you to elope with him no less; and to make matters perfectly fitting the two of you kiss? If I had under any circumstances misunderstood you, please enlighten me." He growled.

Oh my God. I am doomed.

I quietly cleared my throat and started my reasoning, hoping I would calm him down some.

"Edward, I understand that this whole conundrum is unbelievable, and we were both forced to endure it. I was planning on telling you or Esme of the matter concerning—Jasper, but Renee forbade it, threatening me that if you had known of it you or Esme would not approve of the marriage and that father would be humiliated and becomes completely bankrupt. I realize that it was a mistake and that on some level I have fooled you; but once we got married and we started spending our honeymoon, I cannot deny that I was starting to have strong feelings for you. You may never have such feelings for me, but I have and I am not ashamed of telling you. I have wanted us to at least be civil with each other, but the cruel treatment you have given me had put a damper on our relationship and I believe that we both need to work it out together. I understand that you are angry but I you also need to know that most of the things I had done in my life, I was forced to do by my mother. You need to consider this before you make any judgments." I finished, taking a deep breath and waiting for his answer.

_However, his next words paralyzed me to my spot._

I had expected anger, I had expected fury, I even expected disgust; but I have never expected him to speak to me with such hate and to utter such degrading words.

"You expect me to believe such lies?" he snorted, and then angrily grabbed my arms and squeezed so hard I started feeling pain.

"You honestly want me to believe that such a woman, like you who would approve to marry a man she doesn't know for money, that she was _forced_ to do it? And that your father was too weak to stand up to your mother? And that your beloved had been rejected by you only for the sake of _your_ marriage? How stupid do you think I am?" he screamed in my face. I struggled against him in attempt to free myself, but it was futile. Edward was much stronger that I was and I was certain that his firm grip on my arms would cause bruises.

"Edward please stop. You're hurting me." I cried out, my eyes brimming with tears from the pain. He suddenly and roughly let me go; pushing me backwards and making me stumble until I hit the wall. I stared at him in horror, watching as he glared at me with such anger and hate that would have laid me to ashes.

"Edward, please listen to—" he did not let me finish. He growled, shaking his head and snarling out "Don't you dare speak Isabella; your intentions were made clear."

I stared at him in fear and confusion, "What intentions?" I asked. He barked a laugh.

"It's very simple, really; you took advantage of your father's charade, playing the innocent little girl in it and plotted with your mother the whole thing. She would play the role of the obnoxious evil mother, and you would play the submissive obedient daughter and Esme would fall for the bait. You would keep going with your little love affair with your bastard lover and since it would have been scandalizing if he had bedded you without marriage; you saw to have it done by me first, so that you could go running to him, isn't that right?" he hissed, his words filled with venom.

I was staring at him with tears running down my face. I had never thought he would reach such atrocious thoughts. How could he think that? How could a person think in such a way?

"It's only convenient. You and your family would get all the money you needed, and you would have your happily ever after with Jasper, right? A perfect setting for a whore."

_I have had enough._

With the speed of light, I sprinted toward him and slapped him hard across the face.. Twice.

"How dare you? how dare you imply such horrific acts toward me and my family? The only terrible person within my family is my mother, and if I could, I would have ended her life myself. She has done nothing but make all our lives miserable and as for my father, he did what he did because he loved her; as much as it was wrong, he did and there is nothing that can change it. Esme knows of Jasper because I told her a few days ago; and if I were as you described me as a whore, I would have not cared of your and my reputation and would have eloped with him when he showed up at the wedding. You know nothing about me and you have no right to make such horrid speculations. What gives you the right to judge when for all I know you could be worse? I decided to be honest with you because of your confession to me, but if it was going to make my life hell with you then I should have never told you, for I would be happy dead than spending my life with a man who doesn't even care for me and so easily questions my honor without asking."

By the end of my ranting, I was breathing heavily and my face was red and tense with anger. Edward was staring at me with equal anger our chests seemed to rise and fall rapidly in synchronization. Suddenly, Edward jumped on me and smashed his lips against mine. His lips were aggressive as he claimed my mouth. I was struggling in his grasp, forcing me to not give in and forcing him to let go. When his tongue parted my lips and entered my mouth, I bit him, hard.

He yelped, pulling his face away and glaring at me.

"What have you done?" he yelled, licking his tongue gently. I glared back.

"I would be a whore if I gave into your ways. My days as me being a mere vessel to you are over. From now on, you never touch me not in public or private or I swear to God I will kill you. If you ever realized how you have wronged me and came to sincerely apologize and to honestly work on our marriage, then I would gladly welcome you. However, if you choose to still be the same hateful man that you are now and see no good life for us, well I suppose we would life in a dead marriage for the rest of our lives. Now, I would like for you to leave my room, for I am tired and want to sleep." I was both elated and surprised by my strength and bravery. From now on, I would fight back; I am done being the calm and quite Bella. From now on, I am going to strike back just as hard as I have been stroked. No one shall ever walk over me again; not Renee and certainly not Edward.

_I am going to be strong and I will make it work._


	12. 11. The Past Returns

**Edward**

_What have I done?_

I stared after my wife as she entered the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. How could I have said such cruel and blasphemous words? I practically called my wife a whore and I regretted it the minute the word was out of my mouth.

If she was really a whore; she would have eloped with Jasper on our wedding day. She was right and I had to be a stupid, idiotic bastard who would hurt her feelings every time.

However, I was still angry at what she told me. She should have told me about her marriage arrangement to Jasper; but she didn't and the moment she finished her talking, I became enraged. I felt betrayed and lied to and I didn't like that feeling.

_It was enough she only married me for my money, but being promised to another man was another blade twisting into my heart_

I had been lied to once before, and I didn't want it to happen again.

 _You_ _haven't_ _told_ _her_ _of_ _Tanya_ _also,_ _so_ _stop_ _being_ _hypocritical._ The voice sneered once more. Yes, I haven't told her of Tanya, but I was planning to do it tonight; however, her ranting of her story stopped me short and made me think only of her wrongs. I know it's unfair, but that was how I felt.

In addition, I did not believe when she told me she had feelings for me. What sort of feelings was she speaking of? And if so, why hadn't she tell me of them earlier? Was she in love with me? Starting to fall in love with me? Or simply forcing herself to fall for me? I understand I was harsh on her, but I was also doing my best to be sweet and gentle. Perhaps, my harshness was more prominent than my gentleness; but she was my wife and she should have spoken to me.

_I suppose this confrontation was bad after all._

And it was a complete disaster when I kissed her.

I just could not rein myself in. The way she was yelling and screaming at me made her enticing. She was extremely beautiful as she spewed her words toward me. I can't deny that it angered me, but it also made me have sensual and carnal feelings for her.

_It was driving me insane with want for her._

She seemed aggressive and powerful as she glared at me and gave me a piece of her mind. By the time she was finished, we were both glaring at one another and panting heavily. I didn't think, I just acted and with the speed on light, I had her in my arms. She struggled as I ravished her mouth with mine, but I wouldn't relent. Because of her, my feelings and emotions were terribly chaotic and I could not put my mind of the right track.

When I finally thought she would give into me as my tongue entered her delicious mouth, she did the unthinkable.

_She bit my tongue, nearly cutting it off._

I yelped in pain and pulled away quickly, glaring at her. I licked my tongue gently, quietly hissing, as I tasted blood on my taste buds. When I yelled for her to explain herself, she screamed at me once more.

She told me that she would be a whore if she ever given herself to me again, and that I never touch her unless I was truly repentant, and that if I ever wanted her I must be resolute to make our marriage work; otherwise we would be having a dead marriage. After that, she ordered me to leave the chamber for she was tired and wanted to sleep.

I could not move as I kept staring at the closed door of the bathroom, thinking that she has gone too far. She was my wife and I would have her whenever I wanted.

I will be damned if I let her throw me out of my own room.

The door to the bathroom opened and she emerged with a blue sleeping gown. It was apparent that she wore nothing underneath and instinctively, I found myself aroused by the sight of her ample breasts as the swells showed from the transparent fabric at the side of her gown. She stopped short when she spotted me and raised any eyebrow.

"I believe I have made myself perfectly clear; I want you out of my room." She hissed.

I swallowed hard, forcing myself to tame the wild aroused beats inside of me. I took a few steps closer to her until our faces were mere inches apart, and whispered,

"You are my wife, Bella; which means that you must do whatever I tell you. This is my chamber too; therefore, it means I will stay here. You will not throw me out of my room." I snarled, leaning down until my eyes were pouring into hers. She glared back, her stance defensive and defying.

"Alright. I will go to another room then." She walked around me, but I caught her arm and pulled her back walking her backwards until I trapped her between the wall and myself.

"You will not do such a thing. You _will_ stay in _our_ room and there will be no further discussion of the matter." I concluded, pressing my body to hers. Her breathing hitched and her eyes narrowed as my hands caressed her arms.

"As for our nightly activities, I will leave you be until you have calmed yourself down; however, I am an impatient man so do not take much time calming yourself." I leaned forward, brushing my lips to her cheek. I grinned when I felt her shudder but the grin soon faded when she pushed me away.

"I have told you Edward; we will _not_ sleep together or have any physical connection until you have truly repented. Now, please leave because truthfully, I cannot stand the sight of you; unless you would want me to stay in one of the guestrooms or another room in the house." She growled. I glared at her once more, and pushed myself away from her.

"Your stubbornness will get you nowhere, Isabella." I hissed, grabbing my sleeping clothes and marching to the door. I opened it but turned to look at her with my hand on the knob.

"Goodnight, Isabella; I hope you find your solace in a cold empty bed." Then I stormed out, slamming the door behind me.

**-x-x-x-x-x**

The next morning, I woke up feeling disoriented. I reached out to Bella's side, but found it empty and cold. I opened my eyes to see that I was sleeping alone, and not in my room.

Then, I remembered. Bella threw me out and here I am, sleeping in another room away from my extremely stubborn wife. I let out a heavy sigh, and got off the bed. I went to the bathroom and washed up, went back to the room, got dressed, and then got out and to _our_ room. I stood in front of the door, contemplating whether to knock, enter, or simply walk away. I decided on the first and gently knocked on the door. There was no answer, and when I knocked, again there was still silence. I opened the door and peeked inside to find the room empty. The bathroom door was wide open and there was not a sign of her. I closed the door and went down the stairs and into the kitchen. I found Jane wandering around the kitchen and she startled when she saw me.

"Mr. Cullen, I have not seen you." she squeaked. I gave a small smile.

"I apologize Jane; I did not mean to startle you. Have you seen Bella?"

"Yes. Miss Bella went to the hospital with Mrs. Cullen and Miss Alice." She smiled.

I inwardly groaned. She went to see Jasper once again, taking both my mother and sister with her. I nodded stiffly and asked for breakfast. Jane nodded and told me she would bring it to me in the dining room shortly.

I went to the dining room and sat, read the paper while I waited for Jane to bring me breakfast. When she did, I ate quickly and then went out and toward town.

As I walked the streets toward the hospital, I had the strangest feeling. I felt as if someone was watching me. I kept turning around and looking for a sign of anyone who would be following me but I found none. All the people in town knew me and were good people, therefore, I had no reason to suspect any of them; besides, and no one was staring at me or scrutinizing me.

I have decided to forget about it and marched straight to the hospital. Father was waiting for me for yet another medical lesson. As I entered the hospital, the female nurses turned their heads at my arrival at an unholy speed. I rolled my eyes as I walked toward father's office when I saw every one of the nurses looking at me lustfully.

_I was a married man for God's sake. Do these women have any sense of self-respect?_

I knocked on the door, hearing father telling me to come in. As I entered, father raised his head from his desk and smiled.

"Ah, Edward. Finally you have decided to grace the hospital with your presence?"

I huffed, walking toward his desk and flopping myself of one of his side chairs.

"Pardon my delay. I—did not sleep well and when I finally fell asleep, I woke up late."

Father looked at me with his piercing blue eyes; his intense staring was making me uncomfortable. My relationship with my father had always been perfect. He was like my best friend; as a matter of fact, my only friend. I was never good with making friendships, and the few people I have tried making an effort to befriend, only seek either my family's money, or my father's social prestige.

"Why are you staring at me so?" I asked, averting my eyes from his. He sighed, leaning back and resting his back on the chair.

"How are you and Bella doing?" he asked bluntly. I snapped my eyes toward him, shock evident on my face. I did not believe he would ask me in such a forward way.

"We are fine."

He hummed, unconvinced.

"What of your relationship?" he pressed, his eyes conveying me to speak. I've decided to give him something, just so that he would forget about it; also I knew that mother must have hinted that something was not right between us.

"Bella and mine's relations is a little…strained if you might say. However, we are working on it."

He made a humming sound, staring at me with his calculating eyes.

"Listen Edward, there is something I believe I should tell you." He started, his eyes staring into mine to gain my complete attention. I nodded to let him know he had my attention.

"You and Alice already know how much your mother and I love each other," he raised an eyebrow and I nodded with a smile. I always looked up to mother and Father's loving relationship and have always hoped to one day find such love and admiration with a lovely woman such as mother.

"Well, it has not always been rainbows and sunshine for us, son." My brows furrowed in confusion. He gave a small smile.

"We did not marry out of love, but out of our parent's wishes. I was nineteen years old and your mother was fifteen, and we knew absolutely nothing about love, marriage, or family responsibilities. We were too young to carry such amenability and it tired us so much that at one point we were certain our marriage would end viciously, or if not we would have the saddest, most forced married life any married couple would have."

I stared at him wide-eyed, unable to digest his words. The way mother and father were around each other proofed that they were madly in love with one another, and that they were that much in love since their marriage. Nobody would have believed or even thought they would have had days of hate, fight, and despair within their marriage.

"Most of the trouble was caused by myself. You see, I was and still a very jealous man, but I've learned with time to control my jealousy and to become wiser. However, in the first year of our marriage, I was what you would call _the_ _green_ _eyed_ _monster_. Although I did not marry Esme out of love, she was my wife and carried my name; therefore, I had the right to act as a husband and to become foolishly jealous whenever a man spoke with her." Father shook his head and sighed, appearing regretful for what he was.

"She always tried her best to be a loving wife, even though she did not marry me out of love. Esme has always been kind and the most loving woman on the planet, and I believe within our honeymoon she was in love with me; however, my being a man to which means idiocy, I would always ruin it. There were times when I reduced her to tears, and I would be the stupid idiot that I am and not even sooth her while she cried. Sometimes, men tend to do the most foolish and selfish things and they believe they are always right, when in truth, they are ruining their chances to be happy."

I stared at father with contemplation. My behavior was similar to his, and I too had reduced Bella to tears several times and I was an idiot with her.

However, I could not help myself. I am a man after all, and I tend to unleash the wrath of my temper before I think clearly of the situation.

Perhaps this conversation with father would help me with Bella.

"Even though I was insufferable at times, she still handled me with care and love and I found myself falling for her too. We were nearing the end of our first year of marriage when the worst and the best thing had happened." He let out a shocked laugh and continued.

"It was December and it was the middle of the frosting winter. We were invited to a ball organized by her aunt and we had decided to go. That day, I was on my best behavior with her and we had finally confessed our love for each other. Esme was feeling little ill days prior but seemed to manage her constant vomiting and fatigue. I told her we did not have to go if she was ill, but she insisted she was better; she also wanted to flaunt our loving marriage in front of everyone. I smiled and nodded, helped her into the carriage and we rode away to her aunt's house. The night was dark and cold, yet it was the most romantic night we have ever had. We danced and laughed and spoke with the guests and giggled at the happy expressions on our mother's faces. It was not a secret that our marriage was going through hard time, but we managed to survive them; until I have decided to be a bastard and ruin everything." He laughed humorlessly.

"Her cousin Laurent was there, who I had not seen the whole night. Esme and I were standing in the terrace when I told her I would get us a drink. I left her with a kiss and an _I_ _love_ _you_ and left. I was detained by a few of the guests and I was about ten minutes late to go back to her. When I returned however, she was not alone. Standing, mere inches from her was Laurent. I acted on the scene. I did not wait until she told me about it or until we left home and dealt with it in private; nor had I calmly and civilly confronted him of the way he approached my wife. With the speed of light, I launched myself at him and tumbled both of us on the floor. I could hear shouts and screams around me, but all I focused on was the man beneath me. I saw him as a threat, as a man out to take my wife away from me; adding to it, I knew that he had a desire to marry her and I think I just lost my control."

I felt so much like father as I remembered Jasper. I simply could not control my feelings and emotions when it came to him. Yes, Bella was my wife now, but Jasper had asked her hand in marriage before me and she had wanted to marry him. Like father, I acted on my jealousy and without considering the use of my mind.

 _Which_ _caused_ _you_ _tremendous_ _troubles._ My inner voice returned with a sneer.

"What happened next had destroyed every good thing between Esme and me and nearly cost me my marriage. As I was delivering my fists to Laurent's face, I heard Esme scream for me to stop. She even tried prying me away from him, which angered me beyond sanity. I thought she was trying to protect him from me and I hated it. I left him on the floor and turned to Esme, my face hot with the heat of my anger as I glared at her.

"'You are afraid for him? Is that it?' I snarled, watching as her eyes widened. My fogged, jealous mind did not think and considered her expression to be of shock for my knowledge. What I did next I would regret for the rest of my life even though all is perfect between us. I marched right up at her and slapped her hard across the face. Everyone gasped as felt as if my hand was on fire. I immediately regretted what I had done when I saw her face. She stared at me in fear, shock, hurt and horror as tears streamed down her face. Her hand was clutching her cheek as both our mothers flocked her side. Her mother glared at me as she looked over Esme's cheek, while my own mother gave me a slap on my face and started screaming at me for my cruelty. Esme was stood in front of me, when suddenly her face turned deathly pale and her body swayed, sweat started to form on her forehead and without warning she collapsed to the floor. I almost did not catch her as her body slammed into mine when I ran to her. Her eyes were closed and her once rosy cheeks and lips almost turned a terrifying blue. When father examined her, he discovered that she was pregnant, with you." He smiled when my brows rose to my hairline.

He gave a laugh and nodded. "Yes, the fatigue and vomiting days prior were caused because of you my son. And that night, when my father and hers forced me to return home, they had given me a beating of a lifetime for I had not only stroked my wife, but I also endangered her life and the life of our child. Next day when I went to visit her, my face was swollen and all black and blue." He chuckled, rubbing his jaw. It appeared he was remembering the beating quite literally.

"Our parents were against me coming near her and I had taken a slap from my mother in law the moment I walked into Esme's hospital room. I rushed to her side when I had seen the sad and broken look in her eyes but stopped short when she flinched away from me. That moment, I had promised myself to whatever it took, whatever I could to have her love me again. And so, for the next nine months, I had literally become her slave. I did whatever she wanted, brought her whatever she needed. Even when she had wanted to strike me as I had done her, I had willingly given her my cheek and when she rose her hand to slap me, she shook her head and lowered it to her stomach; _'I_ _could_ _not_ _strike_ _you_ _Carlisle,_ _even_ _if_ _you_ _had_ _stricken_ _me'_. That sentence had shaken me to my very core and made me more determined to gain her love and forgiveness again."

He stooped to take a deep breath and then let out a laugh.

"It was not until the day you had decided to come into this world that she had forgiven me. That of course after she had punched me in the face for complaining about the pain in my hand when she had gripped me so tightly while giving birth to you. A piece of advice son, when you and Bella become pregnant, NEVER under any circumstances state you are in pain; that is, if you do not want to lose an eye or your head for that matter."

We both laughed at that.

"What I meant to say from all of this is that life is never easy, especially for newly married couples who were married under obligation. However, that does not mean for you to give up. Give your best and let your true self show and with time, good treatment, and love eventually your life will be the best to ever have." Then he smirked.

"And since you are a Cullen, and my son, you are definitely bound to mess up. Just try not to be too much and do your best to control your anger. Also—there is absolutely no harm in making your wife a little jealous herself of do something to make her go crazed with possessiveness over you. Not only men can be possessive." And then he winked.

_Yes. I blushed at that._

"Thank you father. I was in desperate need for such fruit conversation. I can only hope it works for us as it has worked for you and mother." He got up from his chair and rounded his desk to reach me. He pulled me into a fatherly hug.

"Do not mention it, son. Your best interest and happiness is all I ever think of. And Bella, she is a jewel, a rare gem that needs to be taken care of and loved. You are a very lucky man, Edward."

**-x-x-x-x-x**

The rest of the afternoon was spent with me working with father in the hospital. I had found myself particularly keen on pediatrician when I saw the manner he handled the little ill children. I found my mind wander to having children with Bella, if we ever solved our problems, that is. I felt myself smile as I pictured her belly swollen with our child, while other two were running around her. I have always loved little children and have always wanted many of them as my own.

_But now, I can only hope for it to happen._

After my work was done in the hospital, father ordered me to return home to Bella. He advised me to buy her some pretty flowers on my way home, assuring that it would soften her a bit.

So here I was, on my way home from the florist shop when once more I had the feeling of being followed. I kept looking behind and around me but saw nothing or nobody out of the ordinary.

It was not until I arrived at the house and was nearing the gate when I looked behind me and saw someone following me. The person following me was a few inches taller than Bella, and was dressed in a black cloak, with a hood hiding his face. I quickly hid in the bushes and waited until he appeared in my eyesight. I set the flowers aside, not wanting to tear them and prepared myself for a fight.

For some unfathomable reason, I felt dread and morbid as I waited for the person to show himself.

A few moments later, the person appeared and I launched, grabbing his arm, spinning him around and pinning him to the tree I was hiding behind. The person struggled but my grip never faltered. I was going to kill this person whoever he was for trespassing on my house.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" I growled, tightening my grip on the trespasser's arm. It felt small, as if I were gripping the arm of a woman. The feeling of dread returned when I saw the covered face rise to my eyes and I was struck by a pair of blue eyes.

_A pair of very familiar blue eyes._

"Now Edward is that any way to greet a long lost friend?" the all too familiar feminine voice cooed, dripping with lust and seduction. No, this cannot be.

I took a step back and stared into the eyes of my past, when she uncovered her hidden face, removed her hood, and shook her golden strawberry hair.

All breath left me as I stared at her face. Her smiling face.

"Hello Edward." She grinned, her eyes twinkling with mirth and glee.

 _"Tanya_ _…_ _"_ I said in a whisper.


	13. Chapter - 12

_**Edward** _

I stared at her, my tongue tied and my body frozen. Never in a million year could I believe that I would see Tanya's face again. She was the same, same beautiful features as always only when I was looking upon her now I realized what I have never seen before, what I have refused to see when I thought I was madly in love with her.

I saw how falsified she truly was, and apparently still is.

_I felt sick for ever loving this woman._

I was pulled out of my disgusted thoughts by her arms wrapping around my neck and her eyes staring into mine as her face stopped mere inches from mine.

"I must say Edward I am rather surprised. No _welcome home_ kiss for your Tanya?" she purred, playing with the hair at the nape of my neck. She seemed to take my silence as approval and leaned in pressing her cold lips to mine.

That was when _she_ appeared in my mind.

My wife.

My _Bella_.

I took fierce grasps of Tanya's hands, unlatched her claws from my neck, pushed her away from me but still held the vice grip I had on her wrists and glared at her. She was smirking, which made me sick to my very core.

_How could I have ever wanted to marry her, make her as mother's daughter in law?_

I was disgusted with myself.

"Don't dare touch me Tanya." I snarled, pushing her so hard her back collided with the tree. She stared at me in shock and a glint of anger while all I could do was glare at her, forcing myself to not hit her for if she were a man, her face would have been smashed beyond recognition.

"What is the matter with you? How dare you push me that way?" she hissed.

_That was my breaking point._

"How dare I? HOW DARE I? How dare you show your face here, to me, in my house you lying conniving bitch? You stay away from me you hear? Or I swear I will make your life a living hell." I growled, picked up the roses and turned around to walk back home.

Only her next words stopped me dead.

"I wonder what your lovely wife would say if I decided to meet with her." I could literally hear viciousness oozing from her words. I turned around to see her smirking widely with her fingers playing with her hair.

"What are you speaking of? What are you playing at?" I did not want Bella and Tanya's ways to cross; not now, not ever.

"I am speaking of knocking on your wife's door, and telling her what a tremendous pair you and I were in the past. I would tell her everything that had happened between us in detailed description; tell her what passionate lovers we were, and what a lustful pair we made in between the sheets; I would plant the seed of doubt in her head once I inform her of your knowledge of my return and your wish to meet with me."

I have never wanted to _hit_ a woman as much as I wanted to hit Tanya at this very moment.

I took a deep breath, forcing myself to do my hardest not to lose whatever patience left in me. In three long strides, I was in front of her. She was smirking still, now her bottom lip in between her teeth. Such move would have been seductive to me in the past; however now, it was plain disgusting.

"Now you listen to me Tanya and listen well for I will not repeat myself; STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE. If I ever hear you even attempted to make contact with her, I swear to all that is holly I will make you wish you have never been born." I spat, driving my words further with my firm hand grasping her chin roughly. She gave me a challenging look before grinning widely. I let go of her chin, and turned around walking back into my home. Before entering my house, I looked back to see her gone. I breathed in a sigh of relief and went inside, told Jane to put the roses in water and went upstairs to have a little rest.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

I lay on the bed, staring up the ceiling and thinking of today's encounter. Why would Tanya return after what happened between us two years ago? Why would she trail me and act as if we were long lost lovers? And why the hell was she speaking in regards to Bella? How did she know of my marriage? It was apparent from her disguise that she did not want anyone to see her, or perhaps it was only I she did not want to see who she was?

I rubbed my face roughly, running my fingers through my hair and tugging harshly.

Why did she return? Why now, when I was thinking of a way to gain Bella's trust and love?

I will admit, I have been less than gentlemanly towards Bella, and I have had no excuses, however I was determined to do whatever it took to gain her trust and with time her love.

_And I will get it, cost what it may._

I was pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of heels thumping on carpet covered wooden floor. I closed my eyes, waiting for Bella to enter and realize I was in _our_ bed.

The door opened, a few steps echoed, a gasp sounded, and then the door slammed shut.

 _Well, hello there._ My immature mind saluted Bella's inner feisty kitten.

"What are you doing in my room, Edward?" she hissed. I opened my eyes, slowly raising my upper body until my elbows were resting on the mattress. I stared at her and convinced myself not to jump off the bed, march toward her and take her against the door.

She was a sight to behold.

Her ripe and tiny body was encased in an olive green dress, embroidered with beads of shiny crystals, the bodice brocaded with flowers and endless layers of chiffon. As always the best part of her dressing was where the corset was in place, pulling at her waist making it tiny and pushing up her small but beautiful breasts showing a little bit of her upper chest in a complimenting way.

I could feel my mouth watering as I stared at her.

"EDWARD!" I jumped at her shouting my name. She was glaring at me with such fire it both terrified and aroused me.

_My God, what is this woman doing to me?_

"Yes?" I asked, as dumbfounded as a buffoon. She sighed annoyingly and put her hands on her small hips.

"I asked you whatever you were doing in my room?" I smirked, lying back down on the bed but with my eyes still on hers.

"It is not _your_ room, it is _our_ room. I can come and go as I please." I winked, closing my eyes and waiting for her yelling onslaught once more.

_But it wasn't a yelling onslaught._

Suddenly, I felt small fists hitting every part of my body. I opened my eyes to see Bella hunched over me and throwing angered punches left and right. Her fists landed on my arms and upper torso, and thought she was one of the smallest people I have met, she sure possessed unbelievable strength. The places she hit were already hurting and although she looked magnificent in her feminine fury, I wanted to be unattainable of bruising.

I caught her wrists in my hands, holding them tightly yet with gentleness and pulled her above me. She was struggling in my grasp, to which I smirked and cages her hands behind her back, wrapping my arms around her and holding her firmly to my body. I took pleasure in hearing her sharp intake of breath as her struggles slowly started to wane.

She was breathing heavily, from her attacking moves or my way of holding her I did not know, but her hot mint breath was fanning across my face it made me feel dazed for a moment. I lifted my head toward hers, wanting to catch her lips with mine but she pulled her head back. I tried once more, and she turned her head to the right.

I growled, rolling us over until I was on top. She froze as I trapped her body to the bed, my eyes never leaving her wide glistening ones. I leaned down to capture her lips when she spoke.

"What are you doing?" she asked, her voice a breathless whisper.

"I am trying to kiss my wife, but she seems to have certain barriers in regards to it."

"Well, perhaps because she thinks you are an idiotic bastard who needs to be taught a lesson." She whisper/hissed. I felt my manhood starting to grow hard as I kept her pinned to the bed.

"Will it be settled if I apologized to said beautiful wife?" I asked, nuzzling my face in her neck. She smelled delicious; of vanilla and lavender and I felt myself growing harder with each breath I took.

"Well, that depends." She purred. I smirked.

"On what?" I whispered, lightly nipping at her neck. She let out a breathy moan and struggled a little in my grasp. I unclasped my arms from her hands, wanting her to touch me, to run her fingers through my hair, and to scratch my clothed back with her nails. I was certain my light white shirt would not prevent the markings of her short blunt fingers.

"On how you plan on apologizing to your wife."

That's when I attacked.

I crashed my lips to hers, gentleness and passion enveloped our kisses as she ran her hands over my back. I in turn, started caressing her arms and ribs. I groaned as her fingers played with my hair and I heard her hiss as I lightly touched her breasts. She had more room for movement now and I was desperately hoping for her to use it.

When her right leg urged my legs to open I welcomed it gladly in between them, wanting her to feel how much arousal and passion she raised in me. Both her hands were on my shoulders, fisting my shirt as she moved her leg sensually.

My God, I was about to get an immense pleasure, I am sure.

_Only what occurred next sent me to my knees, literally._

With a firm grasp of my shirt, Bella pulled tightly as her right leg moved to reach my member, her knee grazing it; however, what I thought would feel equal to massive delight was actually colossal agony. I enclosed my hands around my abused cock as I tumbled to my knees when she pushed me off the bed onto the floor.

I sat, cupping my member and staring at her in shock, anger, and agony. You never come across a man's manhood in such a brutal violent method; ever.

"In the name of God, what have you done Isabella?" I wailed, my voice screechy from the blow I have endured. She got off the bed, went to her vanity and adjusted her dress and hair. After she was finished, she walked toward me and crouched until our faces were mere inches apart.

"What husband dearest, can't handle a little blow? You actually believe that with a few kisses, a weak apology and I will be putty in your hands and submit to you? If you believed so, then you are sadly mistaken. I will _not_ be fooled with your male beauty and passionate embraces. Until you really do show me how contrite and remorseful you are, I shan't give in to you or forgive you. Now, I am headed to the other room; please be kind enough to leave once your rather… um, painful situation is settled." She snorted in a very un-lady like, a wide grin plastered on her face. She grabbed an afternoon dress and walked out of the room with loud tinkling laughs echoing after her.

_My God, what have I gotten myself into?_

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

After what seemed like an eternity, I managed to pull myself off the floor and limbed to the bathroom. I hissed, punching the wall as soreness and a slight burn emanated while I took a piss. I groaned after I finished, washed myself and then walked slowly to the bed. I carefully took off my britches and lay down on the bed. I winced as I gently massaged my cock, sending a silent prayer to the heavens that no permanent damage has been done.

All the while I was thinking; _what in the name of God has happened?_

One moment, me and Bella were kissing and embracing on our pleasurable way to coupling, and the next thing I know, I'm tumbling to the floor with both my dignity and cock in shame.

I ask once more; _what happened?_

That's when the irritating voice in my head decided to rear its sarcastic head.

_She isn't like the other whores you would encounter. She's an honorable woman who refuses to be used merely for your bodily pleasures. She will not forgive or trust you if you treat her like a whore._

"I am _not_ treating her like a whore." I hissed to the air, sighing heavily.

_You may think so, but you are. Think Edward; all you ever did was treat her like shit, parade her in front of everyone as the perfect beautiful trophy wife, and the nights were only reserved for your pleasure. Even a whore would take better treatment from her customer._

I cringed at the truthfulness of the voice. I was indeed no better as a husband, I was and still treating Bella like a plaything and it have got to stop.

_I have to stop treating her like a mistress, and start treating her like a wife._

That's when my mind was set. I would do whatever I could to erase the old cruel Edward and recreate a better, gentler, and more loving Edward.

A loving and devoted husband.

However, since she decided to play dirty with her earlier stunt, and my own doubts she would never forgive me, I have decided to venture into another path to walk hand in hand with my groveling attempts.

I was going to make her jealous; lest her feelings be shown as before on the honeymoon instead of her perfectly masked indifference and nonchalance.

_I did not know how, but I was going to have it done._

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

As I went downstairs and into the kitchen, I could hear Bella's carefree laughter echoing around the room. I went inside to see Bella, Alice, and Esme giggling over something. Mother was the first to notice me.

"Oh, you're up dear. Come have some of this delicious food Bella made." Esme gushed, walking toward me and dragging me to stand beside Bella. I felt Bells stiffen beside me and I inwardly groaned at her stubbornness; hopefully, it wouldn't take her too long to rekindle her feelings for me.

"Here, have a taste of this apple pie." Esme smiled, giving me a big slice. I took a bite, and couldn't help but moan loud at the deliciousness of it. It was warm, crispy, and it melted in my mouth like honey. I looked up when I heard a soft giggle to find mother grinning, Alice trying her hardest to stifle her giggles as she blushed deeply, while Bella walked around the counter and was rolling her eyes at me, giving me a glare.

_Not a good company to moan sensually in their presence. No good company at all._

I cleared my throat, swallowing the bite and looking at Bella with intensity.

"It tastes wonderful, love." I winked. She rolled her eyes once more and then turned to Alice.

"Alice, would you like to show me the dresses you brought for me?" I knew it was a ruse in order to escape being around me and this time, I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, yes. Come Bella. You are going to love them." Alice squealed, dragging Bella up the stairs. I looked after them, my eyes never leaving Bella even after she disappeared with my sister. I sighed, shook my head and turned to finish the orgasmic pie Bella made.

Esme was staring at me with a strange look and I found myself fidgeting.

"Is everything alright with you and Bella?" she asked, her voice gentle yet firm. I sighed.

"All I seemed to do is ruin everything when handling Bella. Especially after she told me about… Jasper." I concluded, averting my eyes for I had no desire to see the disappointment in my mother's eyes. I heard her sigh and a few moments later I felt her hand on my shoulder. I looked up to see disappointment, yet understanding.

"You are your father's son." She smiled sadly. I snorted.

"Yes, so I've heard. He told me about the beginning of your marriage." Her eyes widened briefly and then she nodded.

"Yes, you father has always been and still an ill-tempered man; although now, he learned to control his anger and is able to think before acting on impulse."

"I know I haven't been the most ideal son for the past three years, since… well, you know; and I have done and said some terrible things to Isabella, but I am determined to do all I can to gain her love and trust because I…" I stopped, sighing and running my fingers through my hair. She smiled, gently rubbing my cheek.

"You what, darling?" she cooed, as she always did when I was a little boy.

"I believe I am falling in love with her." She gave a low squeal to which I laughed as she hugged me tight.

"Oh Edward, I am so happy for you my dear. I know that you made mistakes regarding… Tanya, and afterward you became somewhat not yourself, and that you mistreated Bella; however, I am certain that you will proof to her and everyone how repentant and contrite you are. Just have faith my darling. Have faith."

"I do mother, I do and I will do my best." She grinned widely, kissing my cheek and milled about the kitchen cleaning and such.

I stood in my place, pondering if I should tell her of Tanya's return or not, when I finally decided to inform her of it. Better to have mother and father informed, lest something sinister happens and destroys everything.

"Mother… there's—another problem." She stopped what she was doing and turned to look at me with her motherly undivided attention.

"Oh?" I sighed, took a deep breath and spoke.

"Tanya is back in town." The glass that was in hand fell and shattered as her eyes widened; only she wasn't looking at me. Her wide shocked eyes were focused on a spot behind me and I stiffened, feeling a cold chill run up my spine.

_Oh no, please God no._

But God seemed to refuse my request in order to punish me for the sweetest, yet hardest voice spoke the words I never thought it would.

"Who's Tanya?"


	14. Chapter - 13

Chapter – 13

Bella

I sat in the library, a Shakespearean play in my hand as my thoughts wandered to the previous week. I closed the book and I let my mind revisit the events that took place after the very deliberated stunt I have pulled on Edward. I felt myself grin, a giggle coming out of my mouth as I remembered the way his face looked like once I have knees him in the groin. However, my grin slipped right off as I remembered the mixed feelings I felt.

That day, after I left Edward on the floor, I went to the guest room and changed into the afternoon dress I had picked. It was a simple yet fashionable sky blue dress with white and slightly deeper blue silk ribbons. My emotions were starting to become chaotic once I left the main bedroom. I did not know how to feel or what to feel, or I may simply did not want to feel; I do not know but when it concerned Edward, everything was disarrayed and confused. At times when I would look at him and see him occupied with something, especially something he liked, I would always stare at him and scrutinize his features and expressions.

Sometimes, he would be immensely focused with his thick eyebrows pulled together in concentration, his full lips set in slight hard line, and his jaw clenching every few times. Or when he is frustrated; he would always huff exasperation, sigh in frustration, and tug violently on his thick hair. The last trait always made me want to move forward, pull his hands from his messy locks and run my fingers soothingly through his thick tresses.

But it was when he would sit on the pianoforte that I always come undone.

The way he would sit on the piano bench, his posture straight and his eyes closed. I always loved watching him when he thought I wasn't watching him. Stray locks from his hair would fall over his forehead, his brows would furrow in concentration as he played. His long pale muscular fingers would move over the ivory and ebony keys in such a sensual way, as if he was making love to the keys. It was one of my favorite pastimes besides reading and walking.

I remembered once when he caught me staring at him as he played. The piece was somewhat sad but still the most beautiful piece I've ever heard. It was as if he felt me looking at him when his head snapped up and a smile broke across his face.

It wasn't a smirk, or a sneer; but a loving tender wide smile that made my stomach flutter. I stared at him for a few more minutes while he played with his eyes staring into mine, not once straying from me. I was filled with inner conflictions in regards to him.

Should I forgive him at the first time he apologizes again? Definitely no.

Should I give him a chance to really prove himself wrong and to work rightfully to amend our marriage? That's what I had in mind; I only hope that he truly work for it from the heart.

As Edward kept staring at me, another matter had crawled into my mind, making me avert my eyes and march out of the music room.

Something that made me suspicious. Something that planted the seed of doubt and suspicion in my mind.

A woman named Tanya.

I remember the way Edward stood frozen when I inquired of her last week as I heard him speak to Esme of her; and what made me even more suspicious was the way Esme reacted to the news.

Flashback

"Who's Tanya?" I asked, my voice loud in the silent room. I was startled when the glass Esme was holding fell from her hands and shattered loudly, echoing around the room. That was the first clue that something bad was connected to this Tanya woman. The second clue was her wide fearful eyes which were trained on me; and the third clue was Edward's instant stiffening once he heard my voice.

My gut feeling was telling me that something bad came from that woman, or bad things always connected to her. Maybe my female intuition was in the works, merely from the sound of her name.

Ever so slowly, Edward turned around and came face to face with me. His face was baring various expressions; shock, guilt, and worry. I folded my arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow, tapping my heeled foot on the wooden floor.

"Well?" I inquired, my eyes trained on Edward. He sighed, and ran his fingers through his hair.

"She's of no consequence." He said, his eyes closed tightly and his jaw was set. I turned my gaze at Esme to find her attempting to occupy herself with the kitchen. I narrowed my eyes at her and she averted her eyes once they've met mine.

Oh no, I was not going to be in the dark on this matter.

"Esme, who is Tanya?" I aimed my question to her. Edward's eyes snapped open and were now glaring at me, while Esme looked like a frightened rabbit.

"I said she's of no consequence. Why can't you just stop speaking of it?" Edward growled, his face tight with anger. I narrowed my eyes at him, and glared back.

"Well, from the way you both are reacting I would say that this Tanya woman is of major consequence to you. Who. Is. She?" I snarled. He smirked, a vicious look taking over his face.

For the love of God, what is he up to now?

"Why do you care?" he asked quietly. I glared.

"Because I am your WIFE and I have all the right to know of this woman who's making you and Esme that concerned and troubled.

"Well, I am your HUSBAND, but that did not stop you from kissing Jasper." He growled.

As I slapped him on the cheek, we all heard a loud gasp coming from behind me. I turned around to see Alice glaring at me with tears in her eyes. A severe look of hurt on her face.

I wonder why?

"You kissed Jasper? Why would you? How could you?" she yelled, tears running down her cheeks. She clamped a hand on her mouth and ran out of the house. Esme ran after her calling her name but not before glaring at Edward and giving me a sympathizing look.

I turned to look at Edward, who was glaring at me while rubbing his red cheek.

"If I didn't know any better, I swear you would enjoy slapping me." he gritted.

"Oh I enjoy it. Immensely. Especially when you rightfully deserve it." I hissed. He was in front of me in two strides, grabbing my arms and squeezing; not too hard to cause pain, but tight enough to gain my attention.

"Well, I don't appreciate being smacked around every time you do not like something I say or do. So I am warning you Isabella; smack me again and you will face the consequences." He shook me a few times to get his point across, which only angered me more. I was done being everyone's submissive. I was going to get answers or he will get slapped every damn second until he speaks.

"For the last time Edward; who is Tanya?" something in my tone of voice of face went through his hard expression because his face softened somewhat and he sighed, loosening his grip on my arms.

"She—she's someone I used to know." He exhaled loudly. I kept pressing.

"Is—is she your lover?" I knew it was uncalled for to put it in such description, but I had to know. His eyes looked at me with sadness as he spoke.

"She was. Not anymore." He sighed. Taking hold of my hands and looking into my eyes.

"I know you've told me of Jasper, and I have been less than gentlemanly with you; but I truly hope you give me the chance to make up for it. And I promise you, I will. As for Tanya; well, I'd rather not speak of her, at the least not now. I do not like speaking about her as—she's given me much hurt in the past and I have already erased her from my mind and heart." He was silent for a moment, letting absorb his words. I reluctantly nodded.

"Will I be seeing her around?" he winced at my question.

"You might; however it's unlikely for the two of you to come face to face . Her family is old friends with mine and we might cross paths with her. I know how vicious she can be and all I ask of you is to never give her any chance and try as best as you can to never be with her; alone or with people around. I don't want her to get to you." He pressed. I frowned, scrutinizing him.

"Why not tell me about what she did to you? And why are you so frightened of her?" I asked doubly.

"Because—she followed me today as I returned home from the hospital, and if I knew Tanya and the workings of her mind, she is up to no good. All I ask is to give me time to find out why she's back in town and when the right time comes I swear I will tell you everything. Just please, do as I ask."

I did not like the sound of things as he spoke and I would be lying if I was not a bit scared now. I shook my head, snatched my hand from his and glared at him.

"No Edward; either you tell me everything now or we are back to the start. I do not want to be threatened by a former lover of yours who's clearly as vicious as you describe her. And if she were that evil, why did you fall for her in the first place? No, I refuse to be in the dark. I have been in the dark before and look where it had gotten me. Either you tell me now, or forget it all together." He was becoming angry as I spoke.

"Bloody hell woman, are you ever going to listen? Let it go for now Isabella and when the right time comes, I will inform you of everything. That is all I can offer." He snarled.

"Well, you can take your offer and go to hell. I do not want to know, but don't even think for a moment that I would let that bitch of yours stomp all over me. My bite is far worse than my bark I assure you. Our marriage may not be perfect, may never be perfect but I will be damned if I let another woman take my husband from me and cause more stress and despair than there already is."

After my rant, I spun on my heels and left Edward staring after me with shock.

End flashback

I snapped out of my memories and my fascination with Edward's playing and scowled, turning around and walking out and toward the garden. I was thankful that the garden was spacious since I normally loved to take walks around, but especially when I had a lot on my mind and wanted to clear my thoughts.

I let my thoughts drift to Jasper. He was back to his house now. Thankfully, he was strong enough to survive his severe injuries and he was healthy enough to heal quickly. Katherine was extremely ecstatic to have her only son back home, even though he still had a long road to recovery; his facial injuries were almost healed. It was his legs that needed severe caring and healing. His right leg was broken in two places while his left had become temporarily paralyzed all he could do was only wiggle a few toes.

Still, it was tremendous that he left the hospital and that he would be healed, in time.

I have visited him everyday ever since he returned home. He was somewhat depressed, but he tried his hardest to come over it. I, Rosalie, Emmett, and even Alice were always with him whenever Katherine wasn't. Things were normal and calm around Jasper but I always noticed a strange gleam in his eyes whenever Alice entered the room, or whenever they were speaking in private.

I have also noticed that Alice has become cold and indifferent toward me. Whenever I tried engaging her in conversation, she would either listen half-heartedly or ignore me all together.

I was starting to become annoyed by it.

There was also the way Jasper and Alice were acting around each other and the way they have become close. Was it possible for Jasper and Alice to have feelings for one another? If I were being honest, Jasper deserved the best woman he could ever have and although Alice was being a witch towards me, I had to admit that she treated Jasper with such care, gentleness and dare I say love.

Strangely, the thought of them loving each other or at least having slight likeness towards one another did not make me uncomfortable, sad, or angered. I was actually hoping that they would have something for each other; Alice was a tremendous girl and Jasper deserved to love and be loved.

Especially after his ordeal in battalion.

No matter what happened between Jasper and I, he was a good man who deserved the best that life could ever give to someone.

..

..

..

..

I was pulled out of my thoughts with loud thumping coming from behind. I turned around to see Edward running towards me, his boots making loud thumping on the rocky pathway leading to the hidden archway which I used to read in whenever it was raining.

"Bella, wait. I need to speak with you." Edward said, his hand holding a grip to my elbow. I sighed, taking a deep breath.

"What is it that you wanted Edward? I am tired of your mind games. If you are planning on speaking to me in nonsense, do not bother." I was neither in the right feelings nor the state of mind to handle his mood swings.

"No, I swear. I am not playing games with you. I—listen, you wanted to hear the truth regarding Tanya, did you not?" his words gained my attention quickly. I stared at him, nodding my head slowly while looking into his eyes for any sign of misunderstanding or lying.

There was none.

Edward was honest in telling me of Tanya, and I have become both curious and frightened.

"Um—yes. I still do. Will you tell me now?" I asked, my hands balling into fists to prevent me from touching him.

"Yes. I will. Will you sit with me?" he asked, motioning for the archway. I nodded, walking ahead of him and sitting down. He sat beside me, his eyes staring straight ahead as he seemed to be collecting his thoughts.

"It happened two years ago. I was in love with Tanya, or so I thought and wanted to marry her. I have tried everything I possibly could to gain her love, but she seemed indifferent, never giving me a second glance; until one day she professed her undying love to me. I was extremely happy and wanted to inform my parents at once. She however refused, stating that she did not wish to marry at such young age and that we wait for the time which suited her. As the fool that I was I agreed, consenting to her request of non-marital coupling. I was afraid I would lose her, so I approved…"

I stared at him as he stared straight ahead still, his eyes hard and hands balled into fists.

"I was in a delusional bliss for two years. Sneaking out of my parents' house, running to our hotel room and spending a few stolen hours in sin. At the time, I thoughts nothing of it; happy with the outcome of spending time with the woman I loved. I lavished her with everything she ever asked of me. Money, jewelry, clothing; everything. I have had troubles with my father for the missing money and when I was forced to confess, I told him and mother everything. Father became angered, while mother speechless and shocked…"

They asked me to terminate the relationship at once, to which I raged and swore to never do. They told me of what the situation would do to my reputation, who would ever ask Alice's hand in marriage if her brother was living in sin, and spending money on the daughter of their family friend like a whore. Mother was more shocked at Tanya's doing, always thinking she was an innocent good girl…"

It was the first time I had heard mother say the word whore and the last. They ordered me to end it, but I stormed out, ran to the hotel, and waited for Tanya. I was planning on asking her to marry me, or that we elope together; whichever worked for us. However, I was shocked to the realization of her ending what we had. She kept saying she never loved me, and that she was only using me to get to my money…"

"I was shocked, hurt, and angered. She had made a fool out of me, made my relationship with my parents the worst I could ever have, and almost made the tarnishing of my reputation public…"

After she left, and later being informed that she had left the country to live in Europe with her aunt, I had had my mind set; that I would never fall in love again, and that I would take vengeance on women with the same character and appearance. She was a strawberry blonde with a curvy body. I went to brothels and fucked women who looked like her with brutality. It did not matter to them, as they were used to it due to their jobs as whores and they even enjoyed it…"

"I was in a very dark place Bella, and I only owe thankfulness and gratitude to my parents. They pulled me from the dark abyss I fell in, straightened me up, and did their best to save me and somewhat bring me back to my former innocent self."

He turned to look at me then, his eyes both hard and vulnerable. He swallowed thickly.

"That is why I had agreed to the marriage mother set up with you. Because they informed me that I would be disowned of my heritage, which would have tarnished my reputation; but also because I could not and would not refuse them. Any demand they asked was divine and I had swore to never put a sad or angered look on my mother or fathers'.

..

..

..

..

"I—I do not know what to say…" and I did not. His tale was unbelievable. Could there be such cruel and vile people in the world that would do such things? Was there a woman such evil and wicked that would break a man such as Edward? There were times when I would see the innocent vulnerable man Edward spoke of and used to be; was he that man at all times in the past?

I could feel my blood boiling in my veins and my face heating with my anger. How could someone do such things to any human being? Be it man or woman. My hatred of Tanya had risen to higher levels and my determination that she does not cross paths with my husband was strengthened. He may have been less than civil with me, but the way he behaved the past week, his confession, along with his apparent vulnerability and regret gave me a reason to defend him, and dare I say hope for us to work on our marriage.

"I only wanted to tell you for two reasons; my desire to share my past with you and be the one to make the first step in making better of our marriage…" he started, his eyes staring into mine. I nodded, smiling faintly at his words. Perhaps we would not have a hateful marriage after all.

"…and the second reason?" he sighed, running his fingers roughly through his hair.

"That—the Denali's have invited us all to dine with them at the end of the week, and since Tanya has returned, and I knew the workings of her mind I did not want you to go blind. I wanted you to be told everything and to know that you are a much better person than she is and not to give her the chance to get under your skin."

I stared at him, wide-eyed. Surely he was jesting.

"What? Why would we go? After everything she has put you through?" I asked, bewildered.

"Her parents are old friends of mine as I have told you before, that and the fact that they know nothing of what she has done. My mother did not want to stain my name in front of them, and did not want to lose the friendship of her childhood friend. Carmen and Eleazer know absolutely nothing of what transpired between Tanya and me."

My goodness, that was such a terrible conundrum.

"Must we go, Edward?" I asked, hoping against hope that at the very least he and I would not be forced to attend. He sighed once more.

"We have to go Bella. I would do anything to keep you from harm's way, but we must attend. I am terribly sorry for putting you in such position, but it's forcible for the both of us, and my parents' also."

I closed my eyes, contemplating the whole situation.

It appears that they will be no escaping such tragic event.

I sighed, opened my eyes and nodded jerkily.

"Alright! We shall go; however, if Tanya so much as crossed her line I will put her in her place. I will not care for her parents'. If she crosses the line, she will suffer the consequences." I warned, dead set on going through with my warning.

Edward nodded, giving a small smile, lifting my palm to his lips and kissing it.

My skin tingled with his touch.

"And I promise you Bella, I swear to you on my life that I would never intentionally hurt you again. I cannot guarantee that I won't be the stubborn idiot that I am, but I would never cross the line with you again. I want a loving marriage with you Isabella; even if you do not love me, at the very least a civil caring marriage." He leaned down, and gently kissed my lips.

"I am so sorry for all the pain I have caused you. From now on, you will be my number one priority and would do all my best to bring you happiness."

Maybe life was getting better for us after all.

..

..

..

..

The carriage seemed to have wings, as we had arrived at the Denali's in what seemed like seconds instead of a thirty minute drive. Edward was holding my hand tightly as his thumb rubbed soothing circles on my skin. Alice was riding with us, and during the past week she seemed to return to her normal loving self and she profusely apologized for the cold shoulder she gave me a week prior. I assured her that all was forgiven and that she could come to me whenever she felt sad or hurting and that she was my sister still.

She was now scowling as she stared out the window. She also did not wish to go to the Denali's and threw a remarkable fit when informed of it. Carlisle had to take back the check he gave her for her new dresses until she huffed annoyingly and agreed begrudgingly to go.

You never come between Alice and her dresses.

"One word she say, one word and I swear I will poke her eyes with a knife, and pull her hair out of its roots." She hissed, crossing her arms under her bosom and sneering. I gave a small giggle as Edward snickered at her feisty attitude. She glared at us, huffed, and then returned to staring out of the carriage.

My God, no one in the family wanted to go; all because of Tanya.

We arrived at the Denali's and the carriage stopped. First Edward got off, then helped Alice, and then me. The house was remarkably massive, but not as much as the Cullens. We saw Carlisle and Esme's carriage and I was thankful that they arrived before us.

They could work as a buffer.

I think.

Edward took a deep breath; put my hand at the crook of his right arm while doing the same to Alice with his left. We went the few flights of stairs toward the open front door, where a butler awaited.

"Mr. Cullen, so nice to see you again. Miss Alice." He bowed, taking Alice's hand and kissing it. He then turned to me with a bright fatherly smile.

"Mrs. Cullen." He too kissed my hand. I smiled back, loving his parental demeanor.

"Aro, it's good to see you also. Are we late?" Edward asked, no doubt wanting to turn around and storm out of the house, but could not.

"Yes sir. They are all in the drawing room; Miss Tanya, too." Edward stiffened.

"Very well. Lead the way Aro."

Aro walked before us, taking us across a long corridor and taking a turn to the left. He led us to a two-door room, opened the oak doors and went inside introducing us.

"Mr. Edward, Mrs. Isabella, and Miss Alice are present."

I saw Carlisle sitting with a middle-aged man with coal black hair, a slightly tanned skin, and black eyes. They were sitting by the fireplace with glasses of scotch in their hands. The man smiled at us and stood up. I looked for Esme and saw her sitting with a blonde-haired woman by the piano in the middle of the room. The blonde woman had a loving face and a warm smile.

It was beyond me to comprehend that the spawn of Satan named Tanya was conceived by such warm people.

"Edward!" said spawn shrieked, appearing out of no where and launching herself at my husband. He froze in his place, his posture of a man walking to the gallows. I wanted so badly to rip her arms off his neck, but Edward did it for me, roughly yet discretely yanking her away from him.

"Tanya." Was his curt reply. She smirked at him, licking her lips and raising an eyebrow. She then turned toward Alice and scowled at her, to which Alice returned with a sneer of her own.

"Alice." She spat her name. Alice narrowed her eyes and growled lowly.

"Tanya." Alice spat back. Tanya rolled her eyes and then turned them on me.

She smirked again, her eyes glinting with viciousness and evil mirth.

"And you must be the new Mrs. Cullen. Can't see what the fuss is all about."

Oh, so that is how she plans to strike?

Well, watch and learn you heartless harlot as you are about to be shown a thing or two in modesty and morals.

..

..

..

..


End file.
